Still hasnt finished school,doesnt work,and is resentful when I suggest getting a job.
2006-09-23 08:58:16 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
We put up with the same thing till the age of 23. We had a son. We decided to purchase him a cheap trailer, found used furniture for it, had extra plates, glasses, silverware, blankets, sheets, etc. Asked him to help us scrub the inside, and then furnished it with extra items we had at our home. (Deep down he wanted a place of his own as much as we wanted him out. We were tired of no job, coming and going as he pleased, friends at all hours of the day & night). Please-Don't get me wrong. I cried many a night worrying about him. He is our son and I do love him but there comes a time when he needs to become an adult and a responsible human being. We also paid the first months rent and furnished necessary staples and some food. He was told he had to get a job and pay his bills from now on. For us, this tough love worked. He found a job close to his home, (had no vehicle so had to ride a bike or take the bus), no TV, no phone. Today - 9 years later he appears to be a a responsible adult with a good job, rents a nice home, has it nicely furnished, has decent furniture, keeps his place extremely neat & clean, has a wonderful girlfriend, and appears happy. Granted-there were a few times he would ask for our help to pay the rent - but he had most of it set aside himself. Good Luck. This is easier said than done.
2006-09-23 09:30:43 · answer #1 · answered by HolidayGurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lay down the rules and tell him you're more resentful of having a son that refuses to grow up and act like a man. He's got 2 weeks to find a job and make plans to get out. If he doesn't do that, he'll find out you don't owe him jack **** including free usage of your home.
2006-09-23 09:27:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick his @§§ Out! Help him find an apartment, and show him the door. You are done raising that child. Tough love works wonders.
2006-09-23 09:05:56 · answer #3 · answered by nitr0bike 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you take away all but minimal support, they will have no choice but to look after themselves. If they are in school. provide a bed, one meal a day, and nothing else. no laundry, TV, Internet, phone,absolutely no cash or credit,ho cleaning. The less you do the more they will have to.
2006-09-23 09:09:02 · answer #4 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is never too late to practice tough love. You have to! It will be hard, but you are doing it for you 21 year old. Good luck
2006-09-23 09:08:30 · answer #5 · answered by anny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have them sign a lease to rent their room from you - if they refuse, call the police and have them forcibly removed from your house, since you have no legal obligation to house them without compensation.
If they agree to may rent and sign a lease, you are now their landlord and can legally evict them if they fail to pay rent. If they don't like your terms, they can simply move out to another place.
If they don't want to grow up, you'll simply have to throw them out of the nest and let them learn by being homeless.
2006-09-23 09:01:54 · answer #6 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well mom i guess its upto you 2 teach your little boy 2 be a man.. its called tough love.. give him 2 weeks 2 find a job or a new place 2 live.. the choice is his..
2006-09-23 09:07:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just kick them out tell them they have to get a job or leave
2006-09-23 09:01:43 · answer #8 · answered by scottygirl1623 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kick him out of the building!
He is lazy!
2006-09-23 09:04:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
set a deadline and stick to it. child sounds depressed or indulged.
read "Before it's too late" by Samenow.
2006-09-23 09:03:28 · answer #10 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋