I have a friend who I have know for about two years. Within the past couple of months things have gotten very strange. I have caught her in a lie a couple of times and there are just some things that cannot be explained. My husband and my mother both think that I need to cut the friendship off with her because they are convinced that she is doing very heavy drugs. We have both smoked weed together( that is the only thing that I have ever done) I know that she has done coke, but she said that she has stopped. I am not smoking anymore. My mother says that all the signs point to heroin. Her husband has done some very heavy drugs and I think that he still is. She is a good person and I care for her. But, I just don't know what to do, I am already in too deep, but I don't want to get in any deeper if she is doing heavy drugs like coke and shooting up. She has kids and often leaves her kids her with me. She did last night and told me this erroneous story about why she had to. An
2006-09-23 05:46:08 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
My husband says that she was lying and that I am naive.
2006-09-23 05:46:36 · update #1
you should call someone have you ever seen intervention? they really helped somepeople i feel bad for what she is doing to her kids.
2006-09-23 05:49:48 · answer #1 · answered by ohh babyyy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think your being naive but rather the friend you are. Maturity comes at different times for different people. Yours may have been before hers. Intervention takes a lot of guts and a hard call. Sounds like you want to and need to do some type of intervention on behalf of your friend. Choose the right time without fear and madness in your heart and speak from your heart. Let her know you want to believe in her but have your doubts. Above all be honest and the intergrity will shine through for both of you that will lead to further mature discussions between both of you. Friendship is a hard thing to lose. Don't lose it because of your fears!
2006-09-23 06:02:38 · answer #2 · answered by A 1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive been in the same situation. because of the children issue, talk to your friend. usually they deny drugs. if your gut feeling says drugs then theres alot more going on in her life, some how innocent people get mixed in with their daily live's .look her straight in the eye and tell her what u think and how its effetcting you and your family. dont continue the friendship until things get better. which they don't, when people are on heroin they dont care too much about anything but that high they get. i was married to a heroin addict for 20 plus years. and i only smoked weed also. but i felt pressured to use some of those drugs. and i did. but didnt continue. she needs help but mainly the children need help seriously, a 2 yr friendship isnt very long. id try to get help for her children , if not id bet youll be taking care of them always.
2006-09-23 06:04:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to believe her lies in order to help her. If she's doing heavy drugs, there's nothing you can do to stop that. It has to be something she wants for herself. But you can, if you want to, still watch her children for her sometimes. By loving and protecting them, you'll be saving them from a lot of misery, and you'll also still be loving your friend. But don't under any circumstances let her draw you into drugs yourself. Tell her in no uncertain terms that that kind of thing is not allowed at your house or in your presence, if the issue comes up. Your example might inspire her.
2006-09-23 05:55:13 · answer #4 · answered by Billy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Complicated situation. I can tell you care about her, which is why others in your life are saying you are naive. I think you should just tell her what you think. You couold end up with her kids for a extended weekend if she goes off on a binge. It's hard but people who are addicted are very selfish when they are using, but everyone can stop..but you personally are powerless to make her stop.
2006-09-23 05:50:49 · answer #5 · answered by uptheladdertotheroof 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By the way i see you really care for her... i think that you should warn her of how bad these drugs are and tell her that she should stop for the benefit of her kids.... and for her own health..if she gets mad and tells u ..tha tu don't know anything... then u should get distant b/c u did ur part... that's what i think... or i would take all of her angriness in and always try to help her get out of it....
2006-09-23 05:51:33 · answer #6 · answered by Cutie77 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whatever you do, do it because YOU think it's right, and not because of what your husband or your mama thinks. and i advise you to talk to your friend about this. and if she is on drugs, you should help her not leave her. but if you want to leave her, you can find other friends i would say pretty easily, but if she is nothing you imagined, and you stop talking to her, and later you find out she is still a good person...well...then regaining her friendship will NOT be as easy, as making new friends. so anyway, talk to her about this.
2006-09-23 05:52:23 · answer #7 · answered by butta_szilard 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with uptheladdertotheroof.
If she is addicted and it sounds as though she is, there is nothing that you can do for her. Like many addicts she will lie and deny. Until she 'chooses' to heal, she will spiral down. It will hurt you and her children. Help the kids as best you can.
2006-09-23 06:03:04 · answer #8 · answered by deepndswamps 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would try to get her and her husband help for the safty of the children, maby send them to a place that helps treat drug addictions and keep the kids while she is there.
2006-09-23 05:50:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is doing smack then lying will come naturally to her. Let her down gently and turn your attention to your husband, if he's on it you've got to concentrate on him.
2006-09-23 07:29:35 · answer #10 · answered by bob kerr 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋