My daughter is driving me nutz she wont sleep!?

Question

my 5 month old daughter used to go to bed at a descent hour like 8 o'clock or so. now she stays up until 10 or 11. and i have to wait until after that to get some of the house hold chores done. but thats not the worst part of it. she majorly cranky. shes screaming and throwing her self back and im really small and shes huge its hard to hold on to her. what do i do? Shes wearing me out. she'll stay up untill 10 or 11 then wake up at like 7 or 8 in the morning plus wake up a few times at night. someone please please help me.

Answer 1

She sounds like she's over-tired or else frazzled from too much going on. Also, is there a chance she's hungry. Their need for milk/food changes. Teething is another possible cause.

You could try calming things down by maybe holding her and walking/rocking and singing some monotonous song. You have to feel calm and come across as calm to her or else she'll sense that you're frazzled, and that will make things worse. Usually if you hold a baby really snugly (at that age, maybe hold her upright with her head over your shoulder) and walk or rock a little they get calmer. You could stroke the back of her head - also calming.

Even if she's teething, keeping the atmosphere (and yourself) low-key and calm and making her feel secure can keep them from getting too upset with any pain.

If at all possible head off any signs that she's about to start being upset. Once they get upset its harder to get them calmed down.

I don't care what anyone says, don't leave a baby to just "cry it out". It isn't good for them, they don't need to exercise their lungs (or whatever else some people think crying is good for), and they just learn that when they're uncomfortable or upset you will leave them on their own!! Sure, they'll stop. So do those babies in orphanages in places like Romania, but that doesn't mean its a good thing for them.

Try to back up her nap time some, so she may be more ready to sleep at 8.

Any chance she's a little colder than she should be and needs to be nice and warm in order to be calm and go to sleep? Waking up a few times in night could mean she's too chilly.

I'm guessing, though, that she may pass the time she should be sleeping, get over-tired, and then "its all over". When they're younger they don't notice actiivity in the house quite as much as they will at her age. I don't mean normal things like talking and televisions on. I mean people being loud, passing the baby from one person to another, a bunch of lights on, a bunch of sounds, a frazzled mother, etc. Newborns can get over-stimulated, but babies her age are more likely to be tuned in to what's going on.

If you try to dial-back some of the activity, noise or lights just a little; and make the effort to be particularly calm right after dinner you may be able to set a better stage for sleeping closer to 8. After she's asleep you can forget about the "atmosphere" (within reason).

Many babies her age will sleep at 8, but they're up at 6 a.m

Really, if she'd stop waking up in the night you would probably woudn't be worn out if she went to sleep at 10 or 11 and slept until 7 or 8.

Answer 2

My 9 month old is doing the same thing. this first year is going to be the roughest. Stay calm, do a few of your chores during the day, go to be when she does, restart a new routine, and pray. I'm not getting any sleep either and I have tried everything except the cry it out method. He's fed well, bathed, warm, soothed, and happy by bedtime, but he still wakes up for comfort. He's 9 months, so teething is also a factor, but he started teething at four months and now has four teeth. Maybe yours is teething. Tylenol before bed time and rub ambesol on his gums every hour. good luck.

Answer 3

How long has this been going on? At this age, it's very common for a baby's sleep schedule to change. (However, I asked about the duration of this because it's possible she could be ill- check her temp, etc.) The way you describe her- being cranky and fussy- it sounds as though she is overstimulated. Sometimes in these instances it is best to lay her in her bed, talk to her in a soothing voice and tell her it's time to go to sleep, and then let her fuss it out. It won't hurt her to do this occasionally and it's better for the both of you so that you don't get frustrated. Also, if it's getting to the point that you're having to "fight" her, she's definitely "too tired" and needs to fight it out on her own. Also, what is her nap schedule like? Is she taking naps in the late afternoon? Babies at this age generally need 10-12 hours of sleep at night and 3-4 hours of sleep during the day. It could be that she's getting all the sleep she needs! ;) I feel for you- I've been there.

Answer 4

Prepare for bedtime as you normally would, making sure all of her physical needs are met.
Include all the things that she has learned to associate with going to sleep in her bedtime ritual, i.e. lullaby tape, special blanket or toy, etc.
When she gets sleepy, put her in her bed.
Position yourself so that you can gently pat her and make sure she remains lying down by gently applying pressure on her body if needed.
When she begins to cry, don't pick her up -- this will be extremely hard to do, but if you pick her up, she will learn to cry next time until you do again!
Continue to pat her, sing to her, tell her you love her --whatever it takes --even though she is crying. You will not be abandoning her, only teaching her to let go and fall asleep.
Ideally, you and her mother can do this together for mutual support.
When one of you can't take it anymore, that one should leave the room for a while.
Keep singing, patting, and comforting her until she falls asleep.

This will work, eventually. The first night it may take an hour-and-a-half or even more for her to go to sleep. The following night she may go to sleep all by herself or you may need go to through the same painful process again. Either way, you will probably face about six crying episodes before your daughter learns how to go to sleep on her own. Each successive episode will get shorter than the one before it. Also, you can begin to leave her alone for a few minutes at a time during the crying and screaming period.

Answer 5

NEVER give a baby honey. I am so sorry to disagree with luvblis, but it is dangerous to give a baby honey. It could cause botulism. Ask your doctor or look it up on the internet.
I agree that she could be teething.
Try keeping her awake a little later at night. Try holding off her last bottle of the night a little longer.
Do not force her to stay awake during the day and not take a nap. Babies need naps, and she will definitely be ill & cranky if she doesn't get one.
As far as letting her cry herself to sleep, there's a difference between whining & crying and you as her mother would know the difference with her. If she's whining I'd say let her whine herself to sleep. If she's crying something could be wrong. She could be in pain, possibly with teething, or she could be hungry, could be time to step up how much she's eating.
Good Luck

Answer 6

It sounds like she is not getting enough sleep during nap times. When a baby is over tired, it makes it even harder to go to sleep. Do Not try to keep her up during the day in attempts to make her more tired at night, it will not work! The more proper sleep a baby gets, the better mood they are in. The first thing you need to do is work on her nap times, then work on her bed time. At her age she should be getting around 12-14 hours of sleep a day. After about 2-3 hours of awake time she should be ready for a nap. This usually translates into 3 naps a day, with a bedtime between 7-8. While you are trying to get her sleep routine down, avoid going out (running errands) during her nap times. I know it is hard, but it will be well worth it once she is on a proper schedule. At her age she is so fascinated with everything, she doesn't want to go to sleep, she then becomes over stimulated, and then over tired. Trust me, it gets better. Just be consistent with nap times! Good Luck.

Answer 7

Been there!! Sometimes I thought I would never sleep again. Sometimes I would be so sleepy I would think I was in bed dreaming that I was sitting there holding my son.
Have you tried giving her a bottle, or if you breastfeed, let her eat. A lot of times they will go to sleep while eating.
Also, a swing usually puts them to sleep, but the trick is getting them out of it & not waking them up.
The best thing I found for my son is to make him stay awake longer before he goes to bed for the night. Play with her, take her somewhere, to visit relatives who will play with her & tire her out. Try holding off her last feeding for the night for another hour or so, unless she's hungry, definitely don't let her cry for something to eat.
It is a stressful thing you are going through, and having to deal with it without much sleep makes it worse. I'll tell you what people used to tell me (that REALLY irritated me, lol) Just hang in there, it will get better.
If I had a $1 for every time I heard "it'll get better" I'd be the richest woman in the world,

Answer 8

You sound totally stressed out. Remember that this is completely normal behaivor for a baby. It will get better. Some things you can do is adjusting her feeding time, waking her earlier, make sure she's taking adequete naps during the day. This phase will not last forever...don't lose your cool. Request help from dad if possible.

Answer 9

try puting your baby in her crib at 8 every night she may cry a little but it will get easy just keep going back to her with out pick her up and comforting her like rub her back and stuff she will soon be back to going to bed at that time if not you can try 8:30 to start and move it back to 8 that is what i had to do and keep at it this will pay off in the long run very hard at first to do i know been there done it

Answer 10

Love your child by providing all the touching, being verbally soothing and talking positively to her.

She needs down time too, even if she screams. Set her down for a bit, say 10-15 minutes and do what you NEED to, get a chore or two done, or at least make some prorgress...

since she screams when you hold her it will be true for when you set her down...... but you've set the rules and the pace.

your love never stops, but you can be productive and not let how SHE acts 'rule' you...... but it can be how you deal with her that will make all the difference in the world.

Good luck, be positive, and this 'phase' will pass.

:)