If my stepdaughter's mother keeps calling my husband harrassing him by talking about me - what can I do?

Question

She called him yesterday to talk about the fact that his daughter's teacher is complaining about her behaviorial issues (which we knew where going to start happening based on the fact that her mother keeps denying him visitation and trying to make his life a living hell now that he is married). In the meantime because his mother is badmouthing me to her, she took great delight in dissing me to him for 30 minutes or whatnot and also bringing up other irrelevant information as well rather than talking about her daughter specifically and her needs. She also continues to say that I am too scared to meet her face to face and/or that I am jealous of her relationship with his mother. OF COURSE I am! That is supposed to be my mother in law and so I am hurt but that is not why I don't talk to her. It is because she is unreseasonable and is not thinking in her child's best interest by denying her father so much.

Is this considered harrassment? What can I do at this point?

I haven't wanted to call her as the bitching stepparent or fall to her level at this point. If she was respectful and willing to work things out - heck I'd take her out for lunch - I even offered it when my husband and I first got engaged. So I don't know if I should fall into the trap of - "I've got to call her now because she dissed me that I don't want to face her" or not. What do you think.

We've been in and out of court about visitation because she keeps denying him visitation everytime she gets "mad" or something of that sort. They have a legal agreement but she can't get arrested over it, so we basically have to wait for court and for the judge to slap her hand and that's it. But she continues to deny visitation.

I tried to offer us going out to lunch once but she continues to tell my husband "I have nothing to say to her."

Also I have a great relationship with his four year old daughter - which keeps me going - because I love her very much and she responds the same. I am not serving as any kind of replacement - but just establishing my own relationship with her.

Answer 1

You need to remain on the high road and don't stoop to their level. Tell your husband that he needs to deal with his mother and ex and that if they cannot be civil to you then they are not welcome in your home or on your telephone. Don't get caught up in their drama. If you refuse to play, they will eventually get bored. However, you husband must also refuse to play or else HE will keep the drama going. Just be yourself and be good to his kids and in time they will learn the truth. If they want to call you a bi*ch because you won't contribute to their drivel or try to taunt you because you won't blah, blah, blah, so what? Laugh at them and be sweetly sarcastic if necessary and in the end you will come out on top. Good luck.

Answer 2

Your husband needs to talk to his mother and tell he to stop bad mouthing you since you are his wife and all, it is his place to do this I wouldn't be meeting her for lunch or anything because that could be even worse, If he stayed on the phone for 30 min. while she dissed you he has a problem he should hang up each time she starts doing this and maybe she will get the message. The judge will get tired of her denying visitation for your husband and seeing them in court each time she is actually in contempt of court, It is all in your man's hands, talk to his mother and not encourage his ex to bad mouth which he is doing by the way if he stays on the phone for 30 min. letting this happen. good luck

Answer 3

Your husband needs to stop letting his ex rule both of your lifes. I f she denies him visitation he should call the cops & get her *** locked up- it is against the law to stop a parent from seeeing their child if there is a court order for the to visit. Also. she will give u problems because she wants to be back with your husband-u need to secretly record their conversations to make sure he is not playing you both.I am going through the same situation.I try not to act stupid like them but sometimes i feel that if i don not speak up for myself they will keep treating bad-only when u show a dumb skank that u are not to be played with is when they will learn to at least respect you.Your mother in law is wrong to down u to your husbands ex.She needs to grow the hell up & stop being messy like a teenager.Your step-daughter sees whats going on & sooner or later will act out towards her mom -my stepdaughter started rebelling against my husbands ex because she used to bad mouth me to her also.I hope that & wish u the best. I feel that all the parties involved should get together & talk about what the real problem is- Go on Dr. Phil.

Answer 4

Your husband is the key. He needs to grow a pair and tell the X
and his mother to grow up, accept you or stay out of both of your lives. As for the denial of visitation. Take her *** back to court everytime she does it. If your husband missed a child support payment she would not hesitate. Keep records of dates that each visitation is denied. When you go to court list each date because each time visitation is denied is a individual seperate incidence of CONTEMPT OF COURT.

Answer 5

they do no longer could be arrested yet reporting them for telephone harassment will in easy terms get them a convo w/ the interior of sight police and a warning. human beings are not getting held in a cellular or put at the back of a squad vehicle for telephone harassment (till they are threatening someones life). in case you won't be able to placed your foot down w/ purely words, that is once you be attentive to you want a a good distance better point of means to assist and there is no longer something incorrect with that. Going to his paintings is purely too a good distance, i might point out that to boot once you're making a telephone document. A restraining order is purely too lots at this element and blockading their extensive type isn't in all probability conversing something to them (the will no longer get the element that what they are doing is incorrect).

Answer 6

i don,t think its harassment sounds like jealousy,i think maybe u ladies probably need to talk because it looks like she has misjudged your character. question did the father your husband have a relationship before u two got married and maybe the father needs to go to court for visitation i know how u feel though but I'm the ex girlfriend with the kid and his new girlfriend called me several times she there not even married i tried to be friends but oh my goodness she only wanted friendship because she is a jealous person and hell i don't even care to talk to the father but be careful with her she sounds like she is full of drama oh boy do i know what it feel like to have somebody put u in there mess

Answer 7

FONE HER, TELL HER SHES FULL OF ****...? if she wont let yer hubby see the girl wats the point of her bugging with stupid stuff, CHANGE YER NUMBER, and just blank your so called mother in law,, sounds like theyre 2 peas in a pod to me,leave em to it, they will soon get bored when they realise your not biting, AND DONT BACK DOWN TO THE EX, youll see shes all mouth when you give as much mouth back, cos this is usually the case , and she is ridled with jealousy probably cos your happy?,X

Answer 8

have you talk it over with you husband?
i recon you have, you sound very pro active to me. i had the same problem as you in the end we brought another cell phone and used the old number for her to contact my partner.
its a hard call if she is only talking about the child the have between them than that should be cool all children need as many postive adults aorund them to guide them through life. but its his issue if she is talking about other problems other than the daughter he needs to be the man you married and tell her to get a life and stop interfering in yours

Answer 9

you should have ran from this arrangement,but since you are in it, i guess you have to deal with all of this drama.well, all i see is that you should stay out of the mix,even if she is bad mouthing you if you just be yourself and just be supportive of your husband by just letting these people ACT out, in the end all they are doing is making things bad for themselves.you maintain yourself and do not get into back talk with her and just try to have Peace in your house ,sooner or later she will see that you will not be party to the bad conduct and all the negative talk about you will prove untrue.

Answer 10

You ned to tell your husband you do not appreciate this woman calling your house and bad mouthingyou. What's wrong with him that he would even listen to her crap? Tell him you insist it stop and right now. Playing the nice person is not getting you anywhere.