We don't live together because he has to have a good job and can't find a job near my school.I feel sometimes that he doesn't listen to me or value my feelings.I've been hurt many times before and won't put up with being neglected, but I take my vows seriously and don't want to end it. We can't even have normal conversations, just talk about how what I'm feeling is bullshit to him.I want to be as honest with him as possible about my feelings...in time I've learned that good as well as bad things need to be discussed.I don't know anyone who is in a similar situation and would like to hear from someone who may understand what I'm going through and what I might be able to do to save my marriage. Thanks.
2006-09-22 17:29:13 · 10 answers · asked by newtothismarriage 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have a friend who is going through the same situation, but the other way around. He is an American and she is Indian. She is trying to work it out, but he is the one not interested. Se will never leave him, because its against her religion, but she talks about how she doesn't have anyone to talk to because the Americans cannot understand their way of living. So my guess is that she doesn't understand the way we as Americans live. All they do is fight. Her sister came to the US and told her that she was too mean to her husband.....
2006-09-22 17:58:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anastacia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As some one said above, many people tend to have difference of opinion after the marriage. So I am sure this is happening because of this and not because he is Indian.
You two may have had a cultural shock, as they say, after the wedding and I can see here too, you want to see if some one had a similar experience like you!
Where will those answers take you? I am sure if you two have an attitude to sit and discuss your issues, that might lead to a healthy life.
In India, electric power failure do happen some times. So see this! If in the night, when light goes off, we get worried and sadly enough, when we know that it was a power failure and all are facing the blackout, we feel okay and normal.
Do U get my point? Ur question reflects your attitude!
2006-09-22 18:02:47 · answer #2 · answered by ~Raju~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You live separately and you don't have normal conversations about how you are feeling physically and emotionally.
I understand your situation.
There is a gap between the two of you which may never be bridged. There is a culture difference that will not change. In his society, a woman's feelings are low on the his list of what is important. Living apart is not helping it either.
I do not know how to help you save your marriage which is so imperiled.
I would ask you to look within you and ask yourself:
Is this what I want in life?
Is being in in a marriage where how and what you feel is not considered what you want?
You need to be honest with yourself.
2006-09-22 18:02:59 · answer #3 · answered by Mark 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Couples should always have a trial marriage. I call it living common law. Live together for 2yrs at least. Because you don't know someone until you live under the same roof. You may take your vows seriously but 7months of fighting between the two of you is not a heathly marriage at all. Thats just my opinion.
Good luck.
2006-09-22 17:43:09 · answer #4 · answered by X-Woman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i do no longer have any first hand adventure. extremely it will be a conflict of mindsets and subculture of two places. We Indians are too smitten by language, faith, caste sub caste and what no longer. your kinfolk may no longer agree for this idea if he's a white (or Afrikaner). they could settle for an Asian on the most. If in any respect they agree it will be with reluctance and on your sake in reality. otherwise those American adult males are commonly very smooth and worrying. They bypass little more advantageous to woo you (compared to Indians). they're going to difficulty to study about your subculture etc. fulfillment expenditures for such marriages are larger than those between Indo human beings and Indians
2016-11-23 16:30:48 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All people who are married fight,but sometimes there could be extra fighting due to diffrences in upbringing, or beliefs.If your husband is Indian, he may have a diffrent religion or his beliefs may be diffrent than yours.Your beliefs are not wrong and his beliefs are not wrong.I would advise that you both try to see both sides of the coin.Maybe you can ask your husband how he was raised and what his beliefs are.Try to see things from his view.I hope things will get better for the both of you.Goodluck
2006-09-22 17:44:49 · answer #6 · answered by Gin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It appears that talks about feelings make most men uncomfortable. I'm sorry to say this, but if he doesn't really care about your feelings, then the marriage is probably doomed. I don't have any experience in this, so the best I can do is suggest marriage counseling.
2006-09-22 17:39:21 · answer #7 · answered by musiclover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Indian as in middle eastern? If you have ever been in a household where they are talking to each other...hell it seems like they are fighting all the time. Get used to it or get out...it's not gonna get better.
2006-09-22 17:34:26 · answer #8 · answered by johnnydean86 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
indian like cowboys and indians?...maybe, just may be .. you are paying Karma of a past life , you where at gen. Custer orders killing mercyless.. Now it's time for payback .. you married chief SITTING BULL!! .. time to circle your wagon!!!
2006-09-22 17:42:59 · answer #9 · answered by vyc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out!!!!!!
2006-09-22 17:43:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋