how can i stop being depressed?

Question

okay. im only 13 but was sexually assualted when i was 12 at a friends house on new years eve. {it was one of her dads friend} im really depressed because i know my parents like my brother more than me because he hardly gets into trouble and i do. like if im suppose to do the dishes and i forget i get yelled at and that really upsets me. but when my brother forgets to do the dishes he doesn't get yelled at. why is that? i mean my parents notice and everything but they don't do anything to cheer me up when im upset. they just yell at me even more and i start getting an attitude because of it. im seeing a counseler but she doesn't do anything for me. i hate my life. right now im at the point where my parents and family are the enemies. i used to love them with all of my heart but now i don't im beginning to hate them. i can't trust anyone but my best friends but she alwayz cares about her boyfriend instead of me. what should i do to help stop the depression and hurt? i really need help.

Answer 1

I'm sorry that happened. Did you tell your parents about the sexual assault and then they started treating you badly? I think sometimes parents can't accept how horrible people in the world really can be, because they are afraid of what it will mean for them - what it will mean they'll have to do to help you. So they take it out on you instead. The sad thing about sexual assault, is that unless you've got a video tape of the person assaulting you, showing their driver's license or something to prove that it is them, someone is going to claim you are lying. That doesn't matter. You know what you know, and that is all that counts. And parents aren't perfect. I bet years from now they will be apologizing to you for acting the way they are acting now. Is there anyone else you can talk to?

Something that I've realized growing up is that you are as good as you believe yourself to be. If you believe that you are above this nonsense that is happening to you, other people will to. You will in fact BE above it. Don't lower yourself to anyone elses level. They are making a mistake in treating you this way, and you can show them that by believing in yourself.

You can email me if you want. I don't check it THAT often, but I will respond. No one should be without help in this situation. I know how it is to be a teenage girl, and it is not a pretty world out there. And that's coming from someone who had it good.

Answer 2

getting over depression is hard every1 knows that but there are ways to help it. If you have a pet try talking to it. Animal and or even stuffed animals can be helpful. Ether a lot of the time will make you feel better because it appears that they are listening to you. If that doesn't work you should try talking to your parents and ask them why they are so hard on you and not on your brother. if they try to blow you off don't walk away feeling unloved go back up to them and insist an answer. Another helpful way is if you belong to a church or a group find a priest or a adult who could help you. If you are all alone then do some thing you are skilled at, that will raise your morals and you will feel better about yourself and be more able to fight depression. A way to get over the terrible that comes from being sexual assaulted is to go and talk to your father so he can find a way that you and he can talk face to face to the person who assaulted you this may sound crazy but that is a way that might make you feel better; to hear the assaulter first hand apology.

Answer 3

First of all, I really admire you for being so strong and telling everyone your story. I'm sure there are a lot of girls in the same situation but are too afraid to talk about it. Second you should give yourself a pat on the back for being the daughter you are, because your parents should feel grateful for having someone willing to tolerate and listen to their yelling. I agree with "Charlie" from above. Helping others cope with their problems will give both of you a chance to overcome this obstacle. By helping others, you will feel good for having helped someone and you will have an opportunity to turn something negative into a positive. Finally, don't look at the dark side of being the "less favored" among children because sometimes it can work to your advantage. For example, if you want to go to the mall or movies, you can say to your brother, "Why don't you ask Mom? She never says no to you." I hope you feel better.

Answer 4

maybe you should get connected with a youth group in a church. I don't know how comfortable you are with that but you might meet a couple of really cool people. I'm a spiritual person so I really believe in having that spiritual family and connectedness. It helps to have someone there for you praying with you.

I know it's hard when your parents are yelling at you more than your brother, but you really can't control your parents other than to just tell them how you feel. And however they respond you have to just take it. Realize that one day you will be independent of them. Realize that they are your parents and even though it's hard to love them, they are your blood. They may still have some growing to do themselves. It may be hard, but try to forgive them for the way they are sometimes. And try try try not to get an attitude with them. It only makes it worse. In those moments, just be strong inside and calm on the outside.

If you ever need someone to talk to e-mail me.

Answer 5

Wow, you have quite a bit on your plate! First, it seems like your parents must care, they have you seeing a counselor, so they must know that something is wrong, and they want to help. Have you tried talking to your counselor and your parents together? It might help you let your parents know how you feel.
As far as helping with the depression, nothing works better than having a hobby or activity that you love, that will help you focus your energies on something positive. This will in no way make up for what happened to you, but it may help to take some of the pain away for you.

Answer 6

i'm glad you're taking the time out to express yourself online. that means that you really want someone to help you think right. children sometimes misunderstand parents, and parents certainly sometimes misunderstand children. just know that that's a part of life. everyone looks back on their lives as they grow through things to realize how stupid they were at times. so, just realize that your parents are not aware of how much you are hurting right now, and whatever you can do to make yourself feel better, you should do it. there are alot of fun things in this world that can entertain you until your parents come around. take your mind off the negative in their life and think only on the positive. there's alot that 13 year olds can do that are positive if you think about it. think about it, and do something good for your life. getting in trouble only gives you misery all your days. don't think negative thoughts! that's the most important way you can help yourself. God bless and keep you.

Answer 7

You're quite the same as me , I depress very often just because having scoliosis and I don't tell my parents about my problems since then .. Well maybe because my culture teaches that parent is not too close to their childs.
But now I get a new way to stop being depressed which is:
start making friends in the internet or Yahoo! answers by clicking the profile and email them(coz you won't probably meet them face to face .. so just tell them your problem)
2. is hug somebody you really love and you'll feel your heart calm.. like me I hug my 6 year old brother or.. even a cute teddy bear

Answer 8

OMG!! my parents r tottly like that and i also get in lots of trouble so i get yelled at. i was depressed like all summer but after i joined the soccer team i was neva home i left the house at 6 for school stay for soccer practice 6 then i go home so i barely see my family which is cool except weekend so join a club or a team or somethinng it really helps

u can look at my questions i had good answers fron ppl whe i asked the same quetion

Answer 9

The first thing you need to do is report the abuse. I was sexually abused at a young age as well and was terrified to tell anyone--until finally I couldn't handle the depression, the hurt, the shame. Talk to your school counselor as well, maybe he/she can help with the situation at home--help you be able to tell your parents how you feel and what happened to you. They can help you with family counseling--which you need in order to understand and deal with the things that have happened to you. One more thing...what ever the situation was, it is never your fault to get abused. I was 13, the first time I was abused and was convinced that I "asked for it"...don't do torture yourself with these thoughts as they just aren't true. Get help--and save yourself a lifetime of heartache.

Answer 10

Volunteer at a teen sexual abuse center to help others with what you've been through. You can't do much about your parents attitudes, but getting out and helping others, helps yourself. Create your own social network and screw your family.