Am I in love? What should I do?

Question

I am a college freshman who decided to attend a university out of state. My boyfriend of almost 3 years, decided to stay in state. We went through a painful summer of unconsciously pushing each other away, and finally an excruciating breakup. He sent me a myspace message last week and a text message that said that he misses me a lot. I really miss him too, but I'm not sure if we can be in a relationship where we only see each other 4 times a year. I feel like I may never find anyone else who I connect with as much as him, and I hate not being with him, but I don't want to feel like I can't enjoy my life here at college because I'm tied to someone back home. Is it worth it? What should I do?
(By the way, the open relationship thing will not work with him)

Answer 1

I think the best thing to do is move on, for several reasons:

1. You won't be able to see each other very often. This WILL affect your relationship, no matter how much you call, write, e-mail, etc..

2. You were together for three years, and your break-up (along with the preceding events) was immensely difficult. OF COURSE he misses you! You were an integral part of his life for a long time. But just think: Are you two really in love and wanting to work for your relationship, or are you attached to what you once had?

3. You're in college now. Rather than going back to an old boyfriend, this is the perfect time to get to know new people and build new relationships. You should be experiencing as many people as you can rather than sticking to what you know - that's part of what makes us grow.

I know it's hard when you both seem to want to be together, and there is always a chance that things would work, but it may not be what's truly best for you...Ultimately, only you can make this decision.

Answer 2

So whats so bad about hanging in there? You won't be in college forever. Also the partying part of college is severely overrated. I mean, whats that going to get you ready for? When college is over you may be glad you still have him as your best friend. He sounds like someone you can trust. Much more than anyone you may want to go out with on a whim.

Answer 3

I think u should improve ur relationship with ur boy friend though u met with him 4 times a year. You should not break the relation. On the other hand you can crate relation with a man who is very close to u.