Does this look good for my journalism paper?

Question

Do High School Freshman really get bullied?
By: Katelyn Josey
You walk into the front door. There are a lot of people staring at you as you walk the halls. It’s not because you’re pretty or popular, but because you’re a freshman.
At least, that’s what some people think of high school. Really its just all talk, no action, and its all just stereotypes as WIHS freshman Holly Berthy said, “I’ve never really seen anybody get put in a trashcan.” Are the first few days at high school really that bad? SHS freshman Sara Fox said “No, you’ve gotten to know everybody in middle school.”
You also hear rumors about how bad upperclassman can be but in real life they’re not bullies. Middles school actually has more violence and bullies! “People actually mature in high school,” Freshman Melody Gill said. “People say that only the freshman get beat up and bullied but I don’t see why. Everyone else in that school was a freshman at one time too!

Answer 1

yes it dose seem a bit one sided, but is very well writen...my history teacher told the class the other day that ignoring someone is a form of bullying. it is fairly short though.also the "WIHS" and "SHS" should be spelled out before u write them in the short form because some people don't know what you are talking about. after u mention them once spelled out then u can shorthand it like that...i like the topic, by the way

Answer 2

It is excellent. Is it for a class? If so, as one person pointed out, it is one-sided. That is great if it is an opinion paper. If not, maybe you need a few negative comments in there too. But as it is written, it is very well done.

Answer 3

You need to close the quotation marks at the end. Other than that it seems okay, but I agree its possibly a bit one-sided.

Answer 4

It is rather short and entirely one-sided but fairly well written. If you write more on it email it to me and I will go over it again.

Answer 5

I like it. Id give you an A+