My 11 month old is so clingy to me, it's driving me crazy! He is not mobile yet, so if I put him down he cries and whinges until I pick him up. If he is in his walker, he will chase me around everywhere I go and scream if I even leave the room for a minute. I hate seing him so unhappy, but I can't be holding him all the time. The only time I get anything done is when he is asleep! Any tips mums?
2006-09-22 11:40:25 · 19 answers · asked by kezzafazza 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
You are just going to have to hear him cry. Theres no way around it. This is probably why he doesn't like to be put down and why he still doesn't crawl. If the crying gets too much for you put him in a playpen and make sure it is in a bedroom and close the door. I have NEVER heard of a baby crying itself to death. If he is still SCREAMING at the top of his lungs in about 15 minutes go check on him. BUT DO NOT PICK HIM UP. He has to learn on his own.
2006-09-22 11:46:20 · answer #1 · answered by *Becka* 3 · 3⤊ 3⤋
This is too hard to answer with out more info. Does he go to a Day Care or are you a stay at home mom? Do you have a private nanny? Have you asked his Doctor? He sounds like he is at a very insecure stage and really needs you. He can also feel your anxiety which can worsen his clingy behavior. Research his daily activities write all things down for a week and see if there is a pattern when does he become more clingy than other times write these things down. Write down what you are doing as well.Do not be afraid of spoiling him, at this age you can't. He needs to feel secure. I can't seem to help with out more facts. Be patient as I am sure you are. And if you are a stay at home mom invite friends in ,or plan outings with your son included but have other adults around you at the stressful time. Hopefully in time he will have some self confidence and not be so clingy.
2006-09-22 12:01:19 · answer #2 · answered by laura_anne_carroll 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Welcome to motherhood!! i'm afraid this has been fairly a lot my adventure for the previous 6 years..with 2 toddlers. i'm surprised even with the indisputable fact that that a 4 week previous is yearning your interest this a lot. i ought to assume that of a 4/5 month previous toddler. I also won't be able to trust that a 4 week previous is merely about crawling. to respond to the door, positioned him in a secure position such as strapped into his toddler bouncer and merely deal with the mood. you're in reality lengthy previous for a couple of minutes and he will quickly understand you come again. There are slings which will accommodate even the biggest of toddlers, save round. Get out and meet different mums, you'll quickly keep in mind that what you're experiencing is fairly a lot the case for each new mum and there is not any longer some thing unusual about your toddler. if you're definitely aggravating, seek for suggestion from along with your well being targeted visitor or Paediatiricain. solid luck and congrats on your toddler.
2016-11-23 15:58:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, small children don't have a concept of time. Two minutes to them is the same as a day. So, start off by speaking to him. Play peak-a-bo so he realizes that even though you go away, you come back. Tell him that you will be back in a minute and then make sure you come back. He'll learn that you will be back and will be more comfortable being alone.
Second, I do think that it's important to foster his own independence by letting him learn to sooth himself. When he cries don't pick him up, but calmly talk to him and let him know that things are all right.
Third, this is a phase at it will pass to.
2006-09-22 11:58:50 · answer #4 · answered by vonwasden 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
First make sure he isn't needing something else, ie. diaper change, food, drink, and so on.
If all those needs are met and he is just wanting to be held then give him a kiss and go about your business. Talk to him as you are going about your daily business but refrain from picking him up. Right now he is used to you picking him up. He needs to get use to you not picking him up every time he cries. His wanting to be in the same room with you is normal and do you really want him where you can't see him?
As long as you talk to him without picking him up he will get use to it eventually. And then you can work on being in different rooms if you want. Like all habits this one will be hard to break for both of you.
2006-09-22 11:51:58 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I cant answer that question because i am in the same boat as you. My son is 2 and he broke his leg 4 weeks ago and he has been really clingy, I just walk out of the room and let him cry or put him in his bedroom and tell him when he has calmed down i will see to him.
2006-09-22 14:32:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I AM SHOCKED at the insensitivity and ignorance of the other postings. It is cruel and senseless to let your baby cry, or to avoid him. He is just at the stage right now when he really needs you. It can be psychologically damaging to not meet his needs. Do not let him cry, do not avoid him - just pick him up and enjoy him. Yes, you will not get anything done until he is asleep, but what in the world is more important than the happiness of your child? My daughter was very clingy at that age, but I met her needs with love, attention, and holding whenever she wanted, and she developed her own independence in time. Your son is totally normaly. Please do not listed to the other posters - listen to your instincts and fulfill your baby's needs now. Babies who have their needs fulfilled develop normally, and grown independence in their own time. Trying to force independence often backfires, and puts a wedge between mother and child that can never be mended. Good luck and enjoy him!
2006-09-23 14:16:28 · answer #7 · answered by Kokopellimana 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well it sounds like your spending too much time with him he needs other kids his age try to put him in a day care center for like one or two day's out of the week just for a few hours so he can be more social it will be hard at first but it will teach him that he doesn't need you all the time lot's of my friends have done this and i plain to as soon as my baby turns 1 he was a premi that's y i have to wait till he's 1 but i don't plan on just leaving him there all the time just anuff where he can have some fun some kid fun i hope it works for you oh and watch the nanny tv show she always has a lot of good tips
2006-09-23 12:49:04 · answer #8 · answered by baby.j 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was told by my Dr. That it's OK for the baby to cry. I never understood that until I was so tired I couldn't stand myself. The hardest thing I ever did was put my son in his crib when I was trying to get things done and let him wail for 20 minutes or longer. The first few days were VERY difficult but I'm so glad I did it.
He's now 8 and extremely independant, he plays by himself reads by himself and doesn't need to be in my business 24/7. He enjoys being with me and would rather do that, but is aware when I'm busy, he needs to occupy his time elsewhere until I'm finished with what I'm doing whether that be watching a show, reading a book, or doing housework.
I need to restate... it will be one of the hardest things you will do, at least for a few days. Don't give up. Show your child that you're in charge. If the crying is too much for you, shut the door to their bedroom. When you put them down and pick them back up again show them lots of love so they don't feel abandoned though.
2006-09-22 11:51:39 · answer #9 · answered by Heather S 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
I have went through the same issue with my baby who is 12 months old right now. You just have to let them cry it out a few times. I always made sure he was fed, not sleepy, not hurting, and had a clean diaper, then if he still cried I just let him cry til he stopped... its working so far
2006-09-22 22:07:41 · answer #10 · answered by steveangela1 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋