I told her she makes me love her too much. I told her that she was too skinny. I told her it was horrible that I couldn't live without her. Stuff like that.
2006-09-22 10:18:45 · 31 answers · asked by Sausage Fingers™ 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It WAS stupid, insensitive and unnecessarily cruel. That is simply not something you would want someone to do to your mother or your sister or your daughter! Man, she's the woman that shares your life and will defend you and your children, cook and care for you if you were ill... she will sacrifice for you and keep quiet. She accepted you with your faults yet you have to point out HER faults as though you were perfect and fault-free?
There is no fault in having a woman make you love her and consider life meaningless without her. Tell her she is what makes life fulfilling and meaning and that you love her for being who she is. So many men across America have fat wives and they dream of having a long legged, skinny woman... you want her to put on on weight? Buy her chocolates and ice cream and take her out to dinner every now and then and get her some cheese cake for dessert.
You sure know how to make us guys look bad and embarrass all of us men. WHATEVER in hell possessed you to do such a stupid and senseless thing like that? Man, that's just being a bully and you did it because you know it would hurt her feelings. Damned, man, ain't you got any shame in you? Is this the way your parents brought you up?
What you SHOULD have said was to thank her for making a man out of you! For teaching YOU that there's such a thing as a woman like her in this world and that she has taught you that the greatest diamond in the world cannot outshine her. Man, get down on your knees and kiss her feet, and hope that she forgive you; you have no idea how lucky you are to have such a great lady by your side. She could have chosen someone else and yet she chose YOU! Be thankful and be grateful!
2006-09-22 11:00:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
While I understand your motive behind this, I think...getting something like a list of your faults however small they may be can crush a person's self-esteem and heart.
It was not stupid of you, but possibly ill thought out. You might want to explain to her why you did this.
Are you afraid she is not taking care of herself (too skinny), afraid she will leave (love her too much, horrible to live without her), etc?
I know from personal experience that my boyfriend hates it that I am the only person he has ever met he can't walk away from in the drop of a hat. It scares him to death that something might happen to me, etc.
If this was the purpose of this letter, then I applaud you being able to say this to the woman you love. So go talk to her and explain.
If you were trying to attack or criticize, possibly do it in a less contfrontational way, like talking. A dialogue is much easier for a woman to accept than the cold black and white of paper.
Good luck!
2006-09-22 18:18:37 · answer #2 · answered by meggs2311 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey I wouldn't so much call it stupid as I would "acting without thinking first". Rethink what you wrote and talk to her, don't write it on paper where it looks like an insulting attack. If you think she is too thin, tell her you are in fear for her health, if you feel she is too clingy, ask her as kindly as you can to allow you some private space, but be willing to give HER her own private space as well and instead of saying it's "horrible" that you can't live without her, say she is your reason for living. Good Luck sweetie and I hope you are able to work this out. Clearly to do love her very much, but just choose the wrong way to say what you are feeling. Give it time, you'll find the right way for BOTH of you to communicate.
2006-09-22 17:39:09 · answer #3 · answered by Daydream Believer 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well... Yes, it was a bit stupid of you. You don't point out a person's faults, whether it be a woman or a man. It makes them feel unloved, and like all you notice is these faults. Especially two of the ones you mentioned... It makes it seem like you don't want to love her, that you don't want to be with her. Find a way to make it up to her and prove that you still love her, despite anything that you may notice as a fault.
2006-09-22 17:33:43 · answer #4 · answered by Caryssa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why on earth did you do that????? Talk about mixed messages, wow. " You're too skinny, BUT I can't live without you", now how did you think she was suppose to react to that? You had better put into action your "B" plan, and start kissing up...starting with a date to dinner, flowers and some 'fatting' chocolates..........and the all important 'I'm sorry' note, and "stuff like that."
2006-09-22 17:58:50 · answer #5 · answered by Nisey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess it really depends on what you were trying to accomplish. Did you want her to recipercate with a letter back to you? Are you having martial problems and you wanted to try the letter as a line of opening honest communications? My husband and I try to communicate in various ways, depending on what it is that we would like to say. Sometimes it is easier to get things out in writing, words sometimes get all mixed up.
2006-09-22 17:27:07 · answer #6 · answered by Smiley girl and guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it was right on the money for a jerk, but you'll be in the doghouse for awhile on this one. Kiss *** and you should be alright, but don't ever put a full pledge attack like that on paper. Also try being constructive with it and don't attack.
2006-09-22 21:03:12 · answer #7 · answered by johnny d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wel, were her tears more for the not bad things you wrote or were they of the bad??
You two should of agreed first to write your little lists on each others faults.
Now, wouldn't you just love to see hers????
Yes it was mean......and stupid!
You should of sat down and talked to her face to face.
2006-09-22 17:31:23 · answer #8 · answered by peggin_beast 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes that was STUPID of you!
Are you going to let us know when she gives you YOUR list?
I would love to hear what horrible things she has to say about you!
2006-09-22 17:26:41 · answer #9 · answered by red.cancer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the perfect letter to me, tell her that she should be happy that you even took the time to write her a letter... lol
2006-09-22 17:31:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋