Every day, my mother asks me stuff about school, yet she doesn't really listen to my answer, or pay attention to what I say in reply. Is she doing it of out courtesy, 'cause it's so rude when she doesn't listen. How often does this sort of thing happen to you?
2006-09-22 09:38:11 · 9 answers · asked by Nicole 4 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
First of all, do not take this personally. It is the result of a conflict within another person having to chose between what that person's MIND wants to do... which is continue what he/she was doing, and to let go of that train of thought, and attend to what you are saying... which may involve having to become emotionally involved in something that the person's MIND may or may not want to be involved in... and all of this happens automatically, and at a level of which the other is not aware.
So, if there is something you need to say that requires the full attention of a parent, then specifically get that by saying "Mom, I need to share something with you that is really important, and when can I do that?"
This will provide a demand upon the others MIND that the others MIND cannot simply brush aside by feeding selective thoughts to the others brain.
Make sense? Hope so. Peace.
2006-09-22 09:58:46 · answer #1 · answered by docjp 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
C'mon! this not only happens with parents! You could be doing this to others. Just be conscious and sincere with yourself and think how many times you have done the same to somebody, maybe to another relative or to a friend because you think it is nice to show interests in you relative / friend, although you are sure that what you're gonna hear is not of your interest. And so you hear only "blah, blah" and you answer "yeah, sure" and at the end the other person tells ya "thanks for listening to me" and you say "You're welcome! That's what friends are for!" Don't be so hard onto others. Next time your parents ask you about your day at school, make short stories and then ask politely "what do you think Mom / Dad?" So you make them interact with you, you'll make them pay a little more attention to what you're saying.
Good Luck!
2006-09-22 10:53:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would love for parent to Listen to there kids! sometimes they just do it to be nice!
but start getting on them quiz them to ensure they listen before you react!
ask them so what did you think about my idea i had about the school board... lets say your joining it
and they say how that's a good idea!
then ask them so how do you think i should go about it!
if they get stumped or ask you go about what
say about the idea i had that i told you about when i got home from school weren't you listening to me?
that is an slightly mature way of pointing it out even to them!
and don't get mad and storm off when they say no or make up an excuse just calmly say why would you ask ifyour not listing i love you mom or dad but if you really don't care to listen to what happend then don't be rude and ask! that will make them feel bad!
then when they do ask you! the next day put everything behind you don't hold a grudge and test them once in a while to ensure they are listening! nothing like keeping your parents on there toes!!!
:)
Mad luv
2006-09-22 09:44:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My parents do the same sometimes. Honestly I don't really know, but I'm guessing that by asking questions it's a way for them to get involved in your life. If you're a teenager, parents are probably feeling that you're drifting away from their protection as you seek greater independence, which may be why they ask you these kinds of things and not respond to your reply.
2006-09-22 09:48:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know me too!
This happens with my dad every once in while, and it's like why even ask me if your'e not going to listen in the first place?
2006-09-22 10:08:57 · answer #5 · answered by Dasja L 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
SHE IS LISTENING.
SHE IS LISTENING TO WHAT YOU'RE NOT SAYING, AS WELL AS WHAT YOU'RE SAYING WITHOUT REALIZING IT.
MOMS ARE SMART LIKE THAT.
SHE IS LISTENING FOR SUBTLE CUES LIKE 'I AM A VICTIM', I AM CONFIDENT IN MY ABILITIES', 'I AM HIGHLY MOTIVATED,' 'I AM DISCOURAGED,' 'I NEED TO IMPROVE,' 'I NEED MORE CHALLENGE,' 'I FEEL OVERWHELMED'....ETC.
SHE CAN'T KEEP UP WITH YOUR CHANGING TRENDS AND WHAT'S COOL, OR WHO-SAID-WHAT-ABOUT-WHO, AND WHATEVER ELSE THAT DOESN'T REALLY AFFECT HER.
SHE IS MORE AWARE THAN YOU THINK. SHE IS YOUR MOTHER AND SHE ASKS BECAUSE SHE CARES ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCE AND HOW YOU ARE HANDLING THINGS.
TRY TO BE MORE EMPATHETIC AND UNDERSTAND HOW MANY ADULT REASONSIBILITIES, OBLIGATIONS, CHALLENGES, AND PRESSURES SHE DEALS WITH. ASK HER ABOUT HER DAY.
2006-09-22 13:07:48 · answer #6 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They ask you the question and if they dont hear anything about something bad happening like fights or problems with the teacher then they dont care.
2006-09-22 10:15:54 · answer #7 · answered by lovely 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
they are just trying to be rude. its like when i say "whats going on" i dont expect a reply, its just a nice gesture your noticing them.
2006-09-22 09:40:25 · answer #8 · answered by Henry_Tee 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
its what crappy parents do, just ask them to stop, and tell them your not wasting your time, if they dont really care.. show them this question...
you guys suck, take an interest in your daughter, i know you might miss a tv show... but shes worth it...
2006-09-22 09:43:01 · answer #9 · answered by yeah well 5 · 0⤊ 4⤋