Why do so many gay men talk in an effeminate/lispy type of voice?

Question

I still don't get what being attracted to men has to do with someone's voice.

And yes I know not ALL gay men talk like that, but it seems like a lot of them do.

Wow you guys are a bunch of hypersensitive PC cry babies. My question wasn't racist, and I even made a disclaimer acknowledging that all gay men DON'T talk like that. Don't answer unless you're willing to read the whole question. And what do you mean "baby daddy"? I'm CHASTE damnit. Chaste and proud. Don't take it out on me cause your daddy never hugged you.

Culture? What do mean culture? Black-American is a culture. Irish is a culture. Gay is a sexual orientation.

Answer 1

Maybe it is because most people will act out on their sexual impulses whether consciously or unconsciously. Gay men will act effimenine and lesbian women will act masculine. All are a sexual display. We humans are a unique animal. This has helped us to adapt and survive social conditions.

Answer 2

I'm pretty sure that at some subconscious level it's a way of identification. Gay men kind of do it as an " I belong" to the group. You notice that it's the men that feel more okay with their sexual and obvious in more than just that aspect of their speech. They are also more likely to let people know they are gay and okay with it. The men that are more likely to keep it private, or try to seperate from the gay culture try their hardest to sound as ungay as possible; as normal as can be. It IS the reason why people talk like their friends, because it shows their status in a group and a membership. That's what it's all about even on the sub levels we can not control...

Answer 3

I can't fully comprehend why some gay men talk with that syle.

I don't come across as being effeminate, but when I (used to) smoke cigarettes, my friends would comment that I hold the cigarette like a girl would. I didn't have any conscious decision in this mannerism...and I didn't want project myself that way.

I wonder if it's because the most elaborate female stars of the past (who are copied by most all drag queens) were full of style and grace - and respected!

Sod it. I have no idea why!!! I've been typing and backspacing for the past 10 minutes.

Answer 4

Perhaps it has to do with comfort. Perhaps it has to do with the fact that the role models out there speak and act in the way they do. Who knows.

As for culture: gay is just as much a culture as it is an orientation. African American is as much a culture as it is a color. Sports guys are as much a culture as it is a hobby. Southerners are as much a culture as they are a geograpic locations. Please understand what a culture is before you say one does not exist.

My question to you though is: what does it matter? Also: Why do so many straight guys speak with an overly macho and forced bravado voice? Why do oriental people insist on taking pictures of every little thing when outside their own town? I know these examples are fair to everyone in that group, but they apply to many of them. The answer, really when it comes down to it, is because they do.

Answer 5

Some gay men play the "social role" of the woman -- the belief that gender is not biological but rather socialized. They most likely do it in order to attract a non-feminine gay male.

Answer 6

Think about it...when you move from the north to somewhere like Mississippi or Tennessee, it doesn't take long until you start getting a little bit of a twang. And it happens all the more quickly if all you hang out with is people from there. Now all of a sudden when you go back north to visit, somehow you are able to leave the accent you've picked up behind (for the most part) and talk northern again but maybe with just a little bit of a twang. The longer you stay in the South though, the more you get converted to our way of speaking.

Same with gays...at first they hang out with other guys who talk that way and begin to pick it up but then they can still talk like the rest of the guys at work and stuff. After a while though, the line gets fuzzier and the guys at work can start to pick up on it. After a time, they too get "converted" and talk that way, whether consciously or not, all the time.

Bottom line, you end up talking like most of the people you hang out with. I know a white Irish girl who talks like she's from Mexico because that's all the people she hangs with. Sounds kind of cool though but I don't think she can turn it off at this point.

Answer 7

I think -- and I have no sources, only personal observation and experience -- I believe it has to do with trying to turn down the crass loudmouth jock/fratboy factor (for want of a better name) in verbal communication and project a more quite, deliberate and thoughtful tone.

In other words, I don't think the group you are talking about tries to sound like women. I think it's a by-product of trying not to seem so boorishly loud and overbearing.

Answer 8

Because some gays feel more feminine than masculine and lisping/femme voices are a way to do that...

Answer 9

It's kind of like Ebonics. Black culture has it's own way of speaking. Not ALL black people talk in this manner, but allot do.

I think it's the same with gay men...it's part of the culture...most I believe don't even know they do it....it's just one of those things.

Answer 10

It's just the way things are. It's a way for them to identify with their culture.

There is nothing wrong with being gay. There is such a nasty stigma attached to them.