Why we expect that someone is responsible & should look after us in ourold age, Whether willing or unwilling ?

Question

Man & Woman are responsible to give birth to a child & the child as per his natural capabilities of mind behave in his life, but if he is not looking after or is incapable to look after his parent in their old ages why the society blame him & give bad name. He might be expected by his parents as bounded labour due to their personal interest out of a humanity.

Answer 1

in the older days people do give birth to have a child to look after them when old but now i don't think so anymore

Answer 2

This happens in some cultures more than others. In some cultures both parents on both sides of the family live with the adult children and are taken care of until their death. In the US the
aged are usually placed in a nursing home until death mainly because both husband and wife work outside the home. It may be looked down on in other countries but is excepted in the US.
It really is a personal preference as to whether you want to or are capable of taking care of your parents in their old age. As adults we can hardly judge anyone for their choices. It is particularly hard if you are an only child as it is all on your shoulders. I have many sisters and brothers and we were able to be with and take care of our parents in their home . They both wanted to die at home in their own beds and that's what they did with all of us around them. If I had been alone then things may have been different. Please be at peace with whatever you decide you can do and don't let the opinions of other people bother you. God bless

Answer 3

My parents raised my brother and I to be independent. They also made it clear to us , that , even if they protested as they aged, they wanted to go to an old folks home, especially if they were impaired in any way.

My mum was diagnosed with MS while I was in my teens. My father died unexpectedly in my early thirties and up to that time she was doing pretty well. After that she became bedridden and I gave up my teaching career to tend to her needs. She was upset about that , but I said it was MY choice to do that. It was one of the most enlightening experiences of my life , I got to know my mum as a woman and not just a mum.

I think this is a discussion parents and children should start having when kids start noticing the decline of grandparents etc. If parents raise their children with empathy as well as responsibility and compassion , then as they age they won't have to worry who will take care them, they'll have planned it with their kids, so no one is in the dark. And it will always end usually on a daughter or daughter in law who will be the principle care giver.

Answer 4

Good question. Good thinking. I will say that this kind of problem arises because we live in a divided world. We human beings are not connected to each other. The world should not be a place where the son looks after his parents. But the world should be a place where the young and active people look after older people, whether they are related or not.
This kind of living is happening in OSHO COMMUNE where large number of people live under one tree. for more information, you can log on to http://oshoworld.com or http://osho.com

Answer 5

It's something you should be willing to do in "return" for the love and nuturing you're parents gave you growing up! Sometimes it causes "sacrafices" in your life but I'm sure many "parents" at one time in their lives had to give up something for their children! I did it for my dad before he passsed and I'm doing it for my mom now! I would never "expect" my children to care for me if I became unable to 'care" for myself but I would like to know that they "loved" me enough as a parent to want to be able to help care for me if I needed them! Society doesn't want the "burden" of taking care of a elder person who can't be taken care of because it's "costly" to do so, when a child is capable of caring but won't or can't! With the population of elderly people today , the money available to care for those who wouldn't be taken care of would run out! Our nursing homes would be understaffed, our care services more limited than they are already, and the quality of "life" greatly diminished! I don't think "society" should be responsible to do a job that is rightfully the childs, only in the case where there is "no" surving siblings! Then we all become burdened! Then "everything" suffers, I think everyone has to do their part and be "responsible"! From one who is there!

Answer 6

Hi Bharat, read about more traditional family values. The shradha parva is one such program Vishwa Jagriti Mission of Sudhanshu Ji Maharaj promotes.

Answer 7

I have cerebral Palsy and come from to different cultures one is saying that we should value our Parents and one calture doesn't agree with looking after your parents and chucking them into the rest home. In my indian culture its ok to have you sick Reletives @ home but the kiwi's are saying that we put them into the rest homes. and people generally follow what everyone is doing all cause they wan't to have a good Reputation but they don't always value the parents wishes. for me I know that i may get hated from my kiwi culture but don't want to offend both of the cultures people are insulting to Me and say who's going to look after you when your mum and dad die . I don't know I would wan't to die with someone by my bedside If I had kids I would wan't them to look after me because I have a disability people ask me how am I going to look after someone if I can't look after myself.

Answer 8

I don't expect anyone to take care of me when I get old. Dr Kevorkian here I come !!

Answer 9

expectations r disappointing