I dated him before I met the man I am with now. I havent been cheating or anyhting so I dont know why he would ask me to marry him. He realy looks seriouse but I have 2 kids one of them belongs to my current boyfriend. Me and my boyfriend get along good but I hate having sex with him I just get disgusted I mean he has realy bad breath and he doesnt want to shave yes he takes showers and he will brush his teeth when I tell him to but his breath still stinks. He likes cars wich is fine but he will go spend all our money on a 67 chevelle instead of paying our house payment. I hate living like this. I feel obligated to him because I have his child but I am realy not happy being his girlfriend anymore. Why should I have to worry about weather or not he is going to pay the house payment or buy another car we dont need. I have a 2 car garrage that has 3 cars in it and that isnt all the cars he has either. I have a barn and a cement slab all loaded with cars.
2006-09-22 03:52:10 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Realy I just wanna know what I should do. I love them both but I would rather be just friends with my current boyfriend and this other guy well we dated before and I am scarred to try again. well we never realy broke up he just left one day and I didnt see him again untill recently. He says he is realy sorry for what he did in his past and that he loves me and I realy believe him but I am scarred. I dont think my current boyfriend will ever marry me and realy I dont want to marry him anymore. I am tired of waiting and all his excuses why we cant do it now. He told me he couldnt afford to take the day off of work. What kind of bull is that. I guess I just feel bad because I dont want to hurt either of them but I know someone will get hurt. I love them both but I feel obligated to my boyfriend I dont know what to do.
2006-09-22 03:58:15 · update #1
I am not gonna have a dozen kids by a bunch of different guys I do know about condoms and birth controll. I am on the shot so I am pretty sure I cant get pregnant besides I havent even slept with this other guy anyway. But I guess if I married him instead of my boyfriend then I would be married and I wouldnt have a bunch of different baby daddies.
2006-09-22 04:08:35 · update #2
dont marry your current boyfriend, youre obviously not happy with him and it wouuld be worse for the child in the long run if you are miserable or always fighting with your boyfriend. dont jump right into the other relationship either though. this is probably something you need to be thinking about yourself and not asking people on yahoo questions. no offense or anything, but you really need to look at what you just wrote and realize you clearly do not want to be with your current boyfriend.
2006-09-22 03:56:45 · answer #1 · answered by LivExLaugHxLovE 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've heard that whether or not you want to marry someone is supposed to be the easiest decision in your life. Whether that is true or not in most cases I don't really know.. but that's what they say. If you are having doubts it could just be cold feet - or it could not be. Talk to someone close to you that you trust - a family member - close friend - some type of relationship counselor might be good, then you could get a more objective opinion, but in that case try to be as honest as possible about how both you and your fiancee might be viewing the situation and not just how you feel about it.
Depending on the advice that they give you, one option would be to have a heart to heart with your fiancee - after all if you do say "I do" he is the one you are promising to be with for the rest of your life and if you break up with him ahead of time, it would be really nice of you to be honest with him about what wasn't working for you and why you can't go through with it. From experience, not having closure is very very difficult on a person.
If you love him, talking to him might help the two of you work it out. However if you don't, I would suggest NOT marrying him out of obligation. It won't do you, him, or the child any favors. You will be unhappy in your life and marriage, he will sense this, the child will sense this and a home without love and commitment is no home at all. You have some serious things to think about.
On the other hand, even if you decide to not go through with marrying your fiancee, I wouldn't rush to go back to your ex. After all, there is a reason he became an ex. It might be important to look back on that and remember why. I don't think it's generally a good idea to jump into a new relationship after just getting out of one. You are possibly seeing the other man through rose colored glasses because you are currently unhappy with your current situation. As they say - and I hate to admit that they are generally right... "The grass is always greener..." My suggestion... take a short vacation - by yourself...Maybe just a weekend if you can get it and think about what you really want in life - how you can get it and still take care of your children (because their lives are very important too - and you are now responsible for their wellbeing and ensuring the best future you can provide for them)
Think about how you can both be a good Mom and yourself.
Best wishes.. I hope it all works out for the best.
2006-09-22 11:10:08 · answer #2 · answered by River 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Clearly you are not happy with your BF now, so I would suggest leaving him. You are not obligated to stay with him just because of a kid together. It's better to leave him now, then make the kid suffer seeing you two really don't want to be together. As far as the other guy, you are obviously scared about him, so I wouldn't risk it if i were you. Something in your gut is telling you not to go with him. Just be single for awhile, give yourself the space, you really sound like you need some "ME" time!
2006-09-22 11:09:04 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Amanda♥ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for u rite now is to stay away from both of them cuzz u really dont know who or what u want in life. If u continue to be this way u will end up a dozen kids and all have their own fathers.
Think abt ur kids and wots best for them rite now.
2006-09-22 11:04:43 · answer #4 · answered by Miss-Kenya 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You seem to be making quite a few excuses for what you are wanting to do....I think you are too immature to handle marriage to anybody at this point. You need to get a job and pay the bills yourself, not rely on a man to do it (or in this case not do it). Your children are your FIRST RESPOSIBILITY! Do right by them!
2006-09-22 11:21:27 · answer #5 · answered by ladysteelersince1976 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like you are just try to make excuses, just get out of the relationship, go with what your heart says, you can still have a good relationship with the father even if you are not together,
2006-09-22 11:12:30 · answer #6 · answered by lala 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all you have answered your question. i wouldnt stay with anyone with bad hygiene. if you noticed it, it means you ARE CLEAN. clean and dirt DONT MATCH! NOW this is funny but my ex was like this and i left him (oh my) same ****. you sound very miserable! PLEASE GO AND FIND HAPPINESS! REALLY. LIFE IS SHORT! you are not obligated to stay with a funky dog breath man because of a child! THERE ISN'T ANY MORAL LAW THAT STATES THIS! PLEASE LEAVE OLE DOG BREATH AND LET HIM LAY DOWN WITH A BUM!
2006-09-22 10:56:51 · answer #7 · answered by nomorepblm 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should not marry either one. It will be hard to make a life for you and your kids, but right now, they should be your main concern.
2006-09-22 11:13:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to find yourself before you marry anyone. You sound confused to me
2006-09-22 11:36:46 · answer #9 · answered by cowboy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get rid of both of them hun.The one you are with will get worse after the wedding. The other ,well,if he just got up and went out of the blue he will get up and go again.You and your child deserve better.
2006-09-22 11:10:10 · answer #10 · answered by abncgirl 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋