How do I tell my husband that I know he's advertising himself for sex on an internet 'swingers' site?

Answer 1

First: go online and make copies of as much of his stuff as you can. Profiles, e-mails to women, e-mails to other women, etc.

Second: Contact all the women he has been e-mailing, tell them you're his wife and that he is contacting women on the internet because you refuse to have sex with him anymore because he was tested and came back positive for STDs and AIDS.

Third: go onto his profile, chance his ad to male searching for other men and provide his work phone number and his personal cell number and then change his password so he can't get back in and fix it.

Fourth: Have copies of everything you copied in step one delivered to him along with divorce papers at his work and while he's at work that day, pack up everything you want to keep and get the hell out of there. And never look back.

It was the best thing I ever did for myself 5 years ago and have never regretted it. Best of luck to you.

Answer 2

Depending on how you feel about it you could answer his add, arrange to meet and hand him the divorce papers when he shows up.

Another interesting thing. My understanding of swingers, while a bit old I know, is that it involves a couple that want to trade partner's. So who would his partner be?

And how did you find this out. Are you looking to swing?

Answer to your question.....walk up to him and ask him who....his screen name....is and why is he doing this. Be prepared for an answer you may not like. If a man is quite happy at home...most of the time....he has no need to advertise. Not always the case but it may be.

Answer 3

there clearly is something wrong with your relationship, for him to have done something like this behind your back.
you should question wether you want to be with him. he has gone and advertized himself as a sexual partner on offer to whom ever may answer his add. he did not ask you, nor has he considered your feeling. this shows he has a total lack of respect for your relationship.
how do you know that he ahsnt already answred an add from someone and slept with them. that is wrong in lots of ways. it shows he can not be trusted. it shows that he does not care for your mental and pysical health. what would happen if he had contracted an sti and passed it onto you? how do you know this hasnt already happened?
it shows that he doesnt care about hurting your feelings and that he is not botherd in the stability in your relationship. if he cared for you, loved and respected he would not have done this in the first place.
you need to consider all those things before you confront him.
deside if you want a relationship with him, considering all the factors above. if you dont, then tell him you know, then tell him to get the hell out!
if you do, you need to sit him down and tell him how you feel. if he promises to never do it again (not that a man like that could ever be trusted again, in my opinion) and start your relationship over.
if he wont retract the ad, or promise or show very deep remorse for what he did, then dump him anyway.
Good Luck.
and remember, how ever old you are, or whatever your circumstances, its never too late to start over.

Answer 4

Straight up tell him, but make sure you have yourself covered as to why and how you found out. Was he just on there to flirt or becaus he was looking to cheat? Ask him if he has cheated. Demand to see his page and check who has answered, also demand to see his e-mail otherwise he is hiding something. That's pretty screwed up of him. Also, you need to have a talk about how he feels about you / the marriage.



Oooooo.... Actually what the person "JoJo" said is a GREAT idea about testing him... Do that first and then confront him.

Answer 5

You print the site for proof, then you confront him as soon as possible. You do not want to have him bring some horrible disease home to you, and I'm sure you don't want to be the last to know. Obviously your husband is thinking strickly about sex, and sounds like he is going to act on it. Good luck with that talk.

Answer 6

Go for the "reply to his ad" approach. Meet him, kill him. Simple. Use an axe, very effective. Or just chop his coq off. Then post the piccies on the same swingers site...!

Answer 7

Don't you just love that answer, answer his add, omg!!!!what a shock he would get.... but hey its not really funny is it, you must be hurt and bewildered, because i surely would be, you need to ask him face to face. I would leave him, sorry this is probably not wont you wont to hear, and maybe i don't have any right to say this, but to me that would make me feel a fool, and there is nothing in the world worse than being made a fool of... especially by someone, you intend to share the rest of your life with and love, good luck, take care and god bless.

Answer 8

And what the hell were YOU doing on the swingers site?

Answer his ad and arrange to meet him for sex. Use a fake profile and a nice sexy pic and that should cure him. He will never know after that if someone he meets is going to end up being you. If he wants to talk to you on the phone arrange to have someone else talk to him for you.

Answer 9

Answer his ad with a fake name and set up a meet at a motel...See what kind of story you get from him to be away at the time his is supposed to meet his date... Get there before he does and give him instructions to come into the room, no lights, no talking, just get undressed. When you get him naked and all excited, grab his balls real hard and ask him what the F*&$ he thought he was doing?

Answer 10

Seeking family counseling to discuss the matter because you are too angry to confront him in a rational matter.

If you have a problem with him having sex outside the marriage then there is no sense repairing this.

It's funny how people are so blind to the obvious clues in a bad relationship.

This didn't come out of nowhere.