coming out to your children what age and whats a good way to go about it?
2006-09-21 17:50:50 · 22 answers · asked by brandy t 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
First of all, there is no age. One doesn't wait until a child is 7 or 9 or 13.
Your child will let you know when it is time. The minute they ask you a sexual question, no matter the age, you should give an answer that they can understand. It is not necessary to give them more information than they ask for.
My daughter was five years old when she asked me if I loved Robert.
I said, "Yes, honey. I do."
She said, "Oh."
I asked her, "Roberta, where does love come from?" She replied, "From God."
I said, "That's right honey."
That was all she wanted to know at that time and she was satisfied with the answer she received.
Above all, be true to yourself and honor your child as a human being who deserves dignity.
Don't worry, baby sister. Your child will lead you!
2006-09-21 20:06:24 · answer #1 · answered by Temple 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I struggled with this question myself and decided not to "come out" to my kids in the normal sence of the words ...
What I decided was that Straight folks dont "come out" as straight to their kids they just live life and act like nothing is rong in their life everything is normal.
So what I did was Live my life just like straight people do with my partner as a family and a couple and hide nothing from our children, we have an open door policy in our home if you have something to talk about you need do nothing more than talk and ask. Our children live in a lesbian home and they know that and their friends and teachers and everyone in their lives know this, and they are ok about this. The children learn what they live, and they realize that there is nothing rong with it, that doesnt mean we are teaching them to be gay but we are teaching them that we are no different than anyone else in the world. We laugh, we cry, we provide for them, we pay taxes, we go on vacations, we own our home, we feed our dogs and take them on walks, we mow our grass, and yes we hold hands in public and sometimes we even kiss, but above all we are the same the only thing different is we are same sex not opposite.
2006-09-22 08:59:31 · answer #2 · answered by RiahWillow 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I told my son at age eight. I personally call that age the age of sencience. The suddenly become aware that there's actually a world that doesn't necessarily revolve around them. It's kind of an age of enlightenment for kids.
I didn't feel it was necessary to tell him before that age because I had only recently accepted myself and "come out" to the rest of my family.
I had just started a committed relationship and wanted him to be completely comfortable with it.
My partner and I had been dating for about a year by that time.
I only told my son when my partner and I had decided to actually move in together.
2006-09-22 01:08:39 · answer #3 · answered by DEATH 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess there's no such thing as good age or right age to tell them about your sexuality. Any age can understand it if you really explain it to their level. It depends on how you are going to explain, the words that you are going to use and others. Its better to let them know early because once they learned it from other people, the effect will be different. and it would be hard for you to repair the damage. Don't be ashamed to tell them what you really are. Be honest, it will set you free from your predicament. Goodluck!
2006-09-22 02:07:37 · answer #4 · answered by Bartypurple lass 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would say NOT to tell them. I dont mean to keep them in the dark, just dont hide it either. They will figure it out on their own. If you pull them aside and try to discuss it with them and you place emphasis on it, they may draw the conclusion that its a 'bad' thing. Let it be natural. Heterosexuals dont tell their children they are straight, I dont think gay parents should have to either.
2006-09-22 09:34:26 · answer #5 · answered by canada_phoenix 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Around 9-12.At this age we can consider a kid is mature enough to think about sex..Sex Education is the best way to teach a kid about sex..You could get a book or find useful information in internet aboout sex education..Good luck!
2006-09-22 01:03:52 · answer #6 · answered by Ashita Tomorrow Iwasaki 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Be yourself and when your kids start asking questions about you, your relationship if you're with someone, where babies come from, etc. then answer their questions honestly in a way they can understand. I don't believe it's a particularly big deal to kids, you're their family after all, you and your partner are who they know and love.
2006-09-22 01:16:49 · answer #7 · answered by Alex62 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
when their old enough to understand...i think every child should know the truth...that you should tell your child everything that is good for them to know...you should never hold back....because what happens when they grow up and have something to tell you but are scared...good communication is always the best answer to everything....just tell them...you love this women or man and they make you happy...
2006-09-22 00:59:43 · answer #8 · answered by chew 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
from the beginning of their life.
if they grow up with it they will understand it, if they go to school for a few years they will get outside influence and if they choose to believe that what you are is wrong they will be angry and feel lied to when you do tell them..just be honest from the start.
2006-09-22 00:54:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
when you think the child is old enough to fully understand and starts to ask questions
2006-09-22 08:18:37 · answer #10 · answered by jldjldjldjldjldjldjldjldjldjldjl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋