Cheating over the internet?

Question

Would you call it cheating if you found a your husband talking to
someone on yahoo 360, she shows him her breast. Then he responds that he would like to see those again and suck on them!
He ask her for her phone number.

I am heart broken he said he would never do this again but it doesn't fix anything. Im not chopped liver, I can't understand why
he has to look at her breast. Im hurt.

Answer 1

I would call it cheating, and I too would be hurt. It's in the heart of every loving man and woman to want to be the only one in their spouse's eyes. He has hurt you, and he needs to understand that. Just because it is over the internet doesn't mean that he wasn't lusting after another woman. Let him know that. Yes, he may have never met her, but he still started a relationship with her, with or without seeing each other in person. That is wrong to you, to the other woman, and to himself.

Answer 2

I have to say, while I totally agree that what your husband did (by not only looking at the woman's breasts, but by leaving those types of responses to them..) is absolutely a betrayal against you and what your marriage stands for.. That's not even the part that stands out as a cause for some major concern. You say that he asked for her phone number.. and that just screams "red flag" .. in my opinion. I mean, sure.. maybe he was just trying to have, what he thought was "innocent fun". But if that were the case, why would he even be interested in talking to her on the phone?

Sweetie, I'm not going to tell you that you should leave your husband over this. Other than what you wrote on here, I know nothing about you, or your situation. I will say though, that it is my personal opinion, and belief.. that if at all possible, when a couple is married and having some difficult times, they should do all they can to work it out. Of course, I don't feel quite the same when it involves instances of abuse, or affairs. But if all he has done is make some out of line comments, to another woman on the internet.. then I would really see if you could work through it together. However, I really think you two need to discuss the whole phone number thing.. That's going wayyyy too far.

So, my advice to you is to just tell him how you feel. Try not to yell at him, as that will only cause him to get defensive, and feel like he has every right to do it.. just to prove you otherwise. So, do your best to have a calm (but lengthy) conversation, and be as open as you can, also encourage him to be open with you as well. Communication is so important, and I think that you both need to be as honest (both with yourselves and each other) not only about this issue.. but whatever else life may throw your way.

If you love each other, and you want to make it work.. I'm sure everything will be just fine. :)

Take care, and God bless you!

Answer 3

Is it really cheating if everything goes on over the internet? Is it cheating if he was looking at some stranger's breast in a magazine or film?

I will allow that the personal corespondence with this woman makes it more, well, personal. I can't blame you for being upset, and no one should blame you for asking him to stop. HE, at least, should be able to see your point and respect your wishes on that account.

In the mean time, remember, he has not had sex with anyone else. He is neither bringing in diseases to the household, nor replaced you with another woman.

This is the kind of behaviour you SHOULD be able to get over. Don't listen to anyone who gives you some kind of schedule as to how soon that should be. But, again I ask, is this really cheating? Is it worth breaking up a marriage over?

If he doesn't stop, then HE may have other issues. If so, you can either decide to help him through it, or you can leave him when he needs the help.

YOU decide.

Answer 4

Technically it isn't cheating, but what it is .. is called 'alienation of affection'... if he said he wont do it again, wait and see, in the meantime put a program on the computer akin to what parents use to monitor their children (webguardian i think is one)... and that way you can monitor him and see exactly what he's doing on there when you arent even at home...at the same time, you get proof if he continues... you need to know for sure that you can trust him at this point- and I will tell u and u may not like this.. but once a man gets into that type of behaviour on here.. it's not likely to change, it only goes onto the next level and ur hubby was well on his way by asking for a phone number.. i hate to be the bearer of bad news, but he's probably already cheated and you just now are finding out... and another good idea i think.. go to your doctor and get tested for std's... just to be on the safe side! if it turns out he's infected you.. heck that is all the proof you need... God Bless you and Good Luck with this situation!

Answer 5

Cheating is what YOU think it is. NOT what people on the internet say it is. Each person has their own definition now days. If you are hurt and he said he's sorry you have to accept that. If he does it again kick his butt out!
....or you can go on to the 360-thing and do it back. Maybe you will find out that he was just having some fun. People say stupid sh*t on the internet that they wouldn't normally say. I think they do it because the person they are talking to can't really do anything anyway.

Answer 6

For sure I would call it cheating...for one he is doing more than just LOOKING he is actually getting involved in the act....though not physically, he is doing it mentally--which may just be worse. I dont understand either why he would do this..I mean you're a woman, you have breasts...whats the big deal about breasts anyway?

I dont know about you but this would damage the relationship for me. I would sit down and let him know exactly how you feel....it's like he does it cause he doesnt think he will get caught..so not only is he mentally cheating, he is lying--which is worse!!!

Good luck

Answer 7

That was very disrespectful of him and if hes on yahoo 360 hes probably going to other places you know like married but looking and yes to me thats a form of cheating and him saying he wont do it again he would have to prove this to me before I would believe him because if he did it the one time you caught him then has he done this at other times when you werent home?also you can try spyware to track what he does when hes online if you are unable to trust him.

Answer 8

Don't listen to those nasty remarks, it's cheating if it hurts you. Personally I have been married for 5 years and if I saw that my husband was "chatting" with another woman like that I would considerate it a betrayal. If you did it what would he think? I would think seriously about what this means he would do if the two of them had called each other, then met, then who knows....The point is if he is willing to say it, he is probably willing to do it. Keep your head up and keep tabs on him if you have to.

Answer 9

He's cheating on you. The only breasts he should be interested are your very pretty ones. If he has a chance to, he will meet this other woman and get poontang from her. He knows you love and trust him, but I'd rethink that if I were you.
Isn't it interesting? you catch him and he say he'll never do it again. Do you really believe him????? look at the other questions on this site, same story women catch husbands and boyfriends they deny it, say say they're sorry then they does it again.
He will NOT stop, he doesn't care if he hurts you. Love you? I don't think he does, Why would he be "shopping" on the Internet?

Answer 10

He has cheated on you, get a key logger, or hire someone like myself to make sure he does not do it again. If you plan on staying with him then I would definitely advise you to get a free key logger, try download.com. Free, discrete and 100% effective. You can see his IM's, Internet history and everything he downloads or emails. Even if he manages to delete all of this from the computer. It will take some time for you to trust him again, just be sure it will be worth it to you...and be sure to check up on him, ask him for all of his passwords and give him no privacy when you are around, slowly you will want to leave him alone even for the sake of your own privacy..but at least the key logger will be babysitting him..Good luck!