Trouble is we live in a reasonable house and I will have to split it and downsize to something awful. Married for 30 years and after working my socks off will end up with very little. Also I really love my home and will be heartbroken to leave it.
2006-09-21 11:28:32 · 30 answers · asked by linda b 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I loved my house also..we lived on the water before Hurricane Katrina. My husband is an alcoholic and has been for many years. I hated what was happening, but didn't want to give up my home. The storm made the decision for me by destroying everything. I am now separated from my husband. I miss my home, but its not the end of the world.
You will find that, with a bit of mourning for what was lost and perserverance, your life will not end without your home. Peace of mind and peace at home is so much more important than living with an alcoholic who refuses to change.
2006-09-21 11:41:09 · answer #1 · answered by watergirl54 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think quality of life. Its not 'stuff' that matters its your everyday experiences and how you feel that matters. Having left an unloving relationship and giving up my home I have some understanding. It was a difficult decision but I felt truly liberated for making the break and I have never looked back. I know its hard especially when you have invested love and attention to a home, but it is just an object and it doesn't love you back. Friends and family are far more important as is what you do in your daily life including work and free time. I hope that you can find the strength to let go and liberate yourself.
2006-09-21 18:36:42 · answer #2 · answered by gbiaki 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You cant take it with you, life is not a rehearsal you only have one chance at it, you will survive and be happy again at least. I was with my ex for 25years and had to give up a very good home etc., but have made a life for myself and love it especially my freedom and have a good home all mine but not materialistic any more value what money cant buy as have learnt you ant take it with you - have lost so many close friends to death in the last few years, this taught me a very big lesson in life make the most of it and people also tell me I look better and younger since being single again.
2006-09-21 22:27:49 · answer #3 · answered by flowerpower 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When everything is said and done, your reasonable house and all the trimmings that go with it are just things. Possessions, replaceable and not worth putting up with second or third best.
You only get one life. I was devastated when I split with my husband of ten years.....I had to leave my lovely home...but now......I met the most wonderful man and now have a fantastic 7 year old son and a beautiful 4 year old daughter.
Don't waste your time, we never know when it will be up.
2006-09-21 18:38:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A house will not make you happy but living with him will certainly continue to make you unhappy.Its a simple choice,your overall level of happiness is much more important than any house;try getting him to leave,that way you stay in the house a few more years until things get settled !
Good luck !
2006-09-21 18:51:18 · answer #5 · answered by any 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can get a mortgage on your own and buy him out if you really want to stay in same house. I think you are wise to end your marriage. Alcoholics only have one love and obsession and that is the next drink. Be tough. Unless he hits rock botom he'll never get back to sobriety, the more you live in co-dependence the more he'll feel it's ok to drink. Good luck.
2006-09-21 18:37:46 · answer #6 · answered by feathergentle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like you have had enough if you are willing to stay because you love your house. When you really have had enough, you wouldn't care about anything especially a material thing like a house. The decision is yours. Only YOU can make it. Good luck!
2006-09-21 18:45:21 · answer #7 · answered by cee cee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happiness is fleeting my dear. You obviously are concerned with the material side of life. Then stay with the drunk man and quit complaining, or go on to live a life YOU choose to have control of and not deal with his disease - maybe without the big house, but with your sanity and peace of mind in tact.
2006-09-21 18:42:34 · answer #8 · answered by Cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From the time i could remember my dad has been a drunk. me my brother, my mom and dad all lived in this really big and nice house. my mom and dad would fight every night. my mother wasn't happy at all. i told her that if she wants to work all her life and come home to this every night. then she can stay. If she wanted a better life for herself then she would leave him no matter how hard it is. You must live a life that you are happy with. not because you are stuck in it. you have to decide for yourself weather you want to be happy of work for that house. i hope that you find your happiness
2006-09-21 18:36:56 · answer #9 · answered by moanakeala808 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sad to say, but if he's an alcoholic and has been for a long time, all you need to do is wait until nature takes its course. Then you'll have the house all to yourself!
2006-09-21 18:48:57 · answer #10 · answered by karen W 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋