2006-09-21 09:07:46 · 26 answers · asked by ERIKA K 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Take some time; talk with your boyfriend (chances are, he may be having some doubts, or at least some feelings, as well); and, talk with a friend, counselor, or therapist, if you need it. Sometimes "falling out of love" is due to withheld anger, outgrowing the other person, changing your mind, and/or developing or acknowledging different priorities. Sometimes it has more to do with one's self than it has to do with the other person.
The point is to DO SOMETHING (rather than nothing). Take action. Change something so that you can learn from it. This is not a dress rehearsal — this is your life! Live it the way you want, and with whom, even if the company you keep is your own. By the action you take, you may discover something that may help you with your decision.
2006-09-21 09:42:03 · answer #1 · answered by alina 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Grow up for starters. What made you think marriage was a big love fest? You figure out what you want, how to get it and get it done. The kids aren't the issue here, you don't stay married for them anyway, you aren't doing them any favors by doing so. Also, if you don't want to be with your husband you honestly don't have any right to stay. You are stealing his life, robbing him of the opportunity to be with someone who does love him, kids or no kids you don't have any right to do that to someone. Time is the one thing you can't get back, you can get furniture, money, cars...whatever else, but time, once it spent, can never ever be retrieved. Thats one of the most devestating things about divorce, the lost and wasted time. You didn't finish your sentence..but 'can't' is nothing more than an excuse for won't or dont' want to do whatever it takes to get it done.
2006-09-21 09:17:15 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mami:
For 15 yrs, I was a cook, chauffeur, wash the clothes, clean the house, physical/dentist appts, go to school when the kids act up and the list goes on and on. I realized that I was Mom/Dad/Husband/Wife all in one. I also thought that I wasn't going to make it by myself with my salary. Guess what I did? I left for two weeks... didn't tell anyone where I was going and I gather all my strength and thoughts, put together my finances to see what I can do. Went back home, when my soon-to-be ex-husband went to work, I cleaned out the whole house, moved into my own apt. and I'm taking care of my children by myself. I am the happiest woman in the world and I have no regrets of what I did and how I did it. If you need to talk to someone, email me @ lalara67@yahoo.com. You don't have to sacrifice yourself and your happiness. It's not worth it. Good Luck!!!! P.S. I have been separated from him for 2 yrs. I have met this wonderful man who loves me and the kids. It feels real good to be appreciated!!!!!
2006-09-21 09:18:38 · answer #3 · answered by hope 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a similar situation and it has been this way through counseling and seperations. Nothing is changing and chances are it won't. Don't wait like I did. Let go and let him move on. Before long you will want to cheat, mine ended up there. It is no good. We have a child like you, but kids want to live in a happy and healthy situation. They can feel the problems too. Good Luck!!!
2006-09-21 09:12:32 · answer #4 · answered by jpet 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pray first for your marriage to get better.It depends on why you don't love him anymore. If you two have small arguments or disagreements, then I recommend counseling but if it is an abusive relationship, you should separate you and the children from him until he gets himself together with counseling or if you feel that even with counseling you can no longer be with him, then you owe it to yourself, your children, and your husband to move on. If counseling don't repair your marriage, you have to move on because when you are miserable, it will affect how you care for and treat everyone in the house. I hope everything works out for you.
2006-09-21 09:29:26 · answer #5 · answered by sam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
kids should not come into it, if you dont want to be there tell the poor guy and stop wasting his and your life, the kids will pick up on the vibes like a bad smell and they will suffer as a consequence,
get out if you dont want to be there,
do not use financial comforts in deciding someone elses future and this life,
life is to short to waste for all concerned and your dead a long time
thanks
2006-09-21 09:11:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well to tell you the truth just because you dont think you love him anymore doesn't mean you have to throw it all away. sometimes people fall apart because of communication barriers. you should talk to him let him know what it is that is bothering you or what is on your mind. if he doesn't respect that then you have a problem. but if he loves you he will respect your thoughts. if you aren't happy and are considering seeing other people then you mite want to get out before you hurt yourself and ohters around you.
2006-09-21 09:13:49 · answer #7 · answered by sky 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is a choice. Try to remember why you married him in the first place. If you just don't "love" him, realize that feelings change, and you have a lot of control over them. The best advice I ever I got about my marriage was from a therapist. She said, everyone feels that way sometimes. You learn to love who you serve. Children are a perfect example of this. They whine, they cry, they poop, they are demanding, and yet we love them. Why? Because you love who you serve. Try applying that to your marriage.
2006-09-21 10:53:32 · answer #8 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, a very very good friend of mine's wife just kicked him out of the house because his wife claims she wasn't in love with him anymore. It destoyed him. We all hate her now and refuse to talk to her. Grow up, you got married and had kids you don't get to be selfish anymore!
2006-09-21 09:23:14 · answer #9 · answered by ~mj~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you have 2 kids I suggest you try and see what went wrong in your marriage and see if you can fix things up.If not you can separate for awhile and see how you feel for each other.Then if feels like it is all over get a divorce.Good Luck.
2006-09-21 09:13:06 · answer #10 · answered by telis_gr1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋