i'm moving away to college this fall and i'm going to have to rent a flat. unfortunately, i can't live in the same place with my friends, 'cause they have other arrangements. a girl i don't know that well offered to stay with me, but i'm not sure it's a good idea. what do you think? any advices?
2006-09-21 08:31:46 · 7 answers · asked by ashley 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
i must add that i live in europe, not in america. i met here while we were preparing for exams this year.
2006-09-21 08:38:20 · update #1
Hiya
I have lived with friends and lived with strangers in houseshares and they both have advantages and disadvantages.
Friends -
You know each other fairly well, so you will feel at home quicker and you know what to expect.
However living with someone is different to being friends - i know that sometimes friends don't mix because of differences in ideas about cleaning, socialising etc - this doesn't make you bad people if you don't get on but it has put a strain on friendships.
Also sometimes you need personal space from your close friends - especially if you get a boyfriend. It can put a strain on the friend boyfriend balance.
Sometimes it is just inbred living with friends especially if you work with them or study with them. I like having different friends in different social circles.
Living with strangers.
You come together as housemates who may or may not become close friends - it is easier to negotiate how clean etc the house is and you can have more space from eachother.
Having said that i have become very good friends with lots of strangers that i moved in with. However if you don't get on it has not put any strain on the friendships.
Also sharing with strangers is a great way to bond with new people and you get to keep your existing friends as well.
I
One thing i would say is you can pretty much tell whether you are going to get on as housemates after three months whether you are friends or strangers before hand. If after 3 months it is not what you want then maybe you should move on.
Think about what you want in a house. Some house shares are not sociable - some are really sociable and are more like a family than people that exist in the same space.
Trust your gut instinct - do you have the same interest in parties, cooking, socializing and sitting in.
House sharing is an adventure - you will have good house shares and bad house shares but they will always give you lots to talk about.
Good luck
2006-09-21 08:42:25 · answer #1 · answered by Bebe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No harm in trying it out..its like making new friends.. u dont fully trust them at first.. and you arent so sure about them at first.. but if you just talk to them.. youll get the feeling if you could be friends or not.. and if they sound like an good room mate or not.. talk to the person .. on the phone and then in person to see.. if you feel it would be okay or not.. if ur not okay.. then dont get into any commits or any contracts with them.. but mm.. its been done before with strangers turn out ot be good friends after.. so get to know the person before you get the flat..or if you odnt have time too.. just go off your instincts on this one..
2006-09-21 15:35:22 · answer #2 · answered by desixraja 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure either. Why don't you spend some time with the girl before you go to college? Get to know her and ask each other about likes,dislikes,ground rules,then decide
2006-09-21 15:37:48 · answer #3 · answered by Taylor29 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What State / City are you going to be living in.
How long have you know her and where did you meet her?
2006-09-21 15:35:52 · answer #4 · answered by Shy1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You won't know unless you give her a chance. It'll help pay the bills at least.
2006-09-21 15:34:09 · answer #5 · answered by Ahwell 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would rather stay with someone i didnt know, that way it will be easier to kick them out if it doesnt work out.
2006-09-21 15:34:33 · answer #6 · answered by Dawn C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just becareful ....
2006-09-21 15:34:15 · answer #7 · answered by Tartlettes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋