My fiance and I have been having some heated disagreements lately and he's been verbally abusive (cursing, etc.) There's a man here (younger than I am - i'm 29) who i've been helping book shows for his band. I've been thinking about him a lot lately. He walks by my desk and gives me these looks. And we email eachother a lot, 99% for business, 1% smalltalk, although when we discuss business it feels like we're old friends. Yet when we see eachother, we're both really quiet. He even emailed me the day he got a buzz cut (he had really long hair before). Now he looks sexier than ever and i'm losing it!
What do I do? I've been wanting to just kiss him lately. I feel like a skank!
2006-09-21 05:29:33 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I should mention that my fiance had a brief, secret "friendship" with a woman about six months ago. He never told me about her but I saw he'd called her a couple times. To this day, he acts like he has amnesia about the whole thing - even acting like he can't remember her name. Still, I didn't have proof of anything so I couldn't accuse him of anything. I think that's why i'm entertaining these thoughts. He's been working here for a while and I didn't used to look twice at him.
2006-09-21 05:40:54 · update #1
No, you shouldn't feel like a skank; you are human by the way. I would definitely talk with your fiance with everything that's going on between you two lately. Usually, individuals that are bothered by the slightest irritation means they have a larger issue underneath.
2006-09-21 05:47:31 · answer #1 · answered by E. Gads 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
By all means do not feel like a skank! It happens. u should fugure out if u really want to marry the guy your engaged 2. there is always gonna be temptation in a relationship. something better is always gonna come and make your head turn. Thats just LIFE. Do you think stress is causing you and your fiance' 2 argue alot? Have u 2 sat and discussed your current issues with the relationship? whatever you do don't lose the friendship between you 2 just take a break from eachother and see what happens. If you end up with the younger guy then it was meant to be!
2006-09-21 05:39:43 · answer #2 · answered by ENVY-ME 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All I can say is if you're not happy at home, you'll get it somewhere else.
Don't stay with someone or commit for the rest of your life if you're unsure for even a second whether or not it's gonna work out. Call off the engagement for a little while and tell him you need more time to think about this life long decision. If he can't respect that, then you don't need him anyway. If he's cool with it, date other people to MAKE SURE you're right for one another. You may fall head over heels for this guy at work, but then again, he could be worse than your fiance'.
All you can do is try...
Good luck!
P.S. You're not a skank. It's very natural to have these kind of feelings when things aren't perfect at home. Relationships are all about compromise...on BOTH parts. You deserve better than someone who's gonna degrade you with such words.
2006-09-21 05:45:08 · answer #3 · answered by Shining Ray of Light 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't feel like a skank! I have seen people in similar predicaments and I know how tough it is. The best thing to do is try and keep to yourself. If you're engaged, have you set a date? If so, maybe set back the date a while to see if your feelings for the co-worker are a lasting thing or if you were just looking for someone else because your partner was having a bad week (or month...). Then again, is this a lust issue? Maybe if your co-worker is on People's top 100 list, that's making your fiance look worse? If the problem (and confusion) continues, you may want to go and talk to someone about your feelings.
2006-09-21 05:37:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is very clear that if this is the situation before the wedding, then it will be hopeless afterwards. There is no point in going forward with this.
Cancel the engagement, put that relationship on "Hold," and sort it out with the other man. He could be the right one, but be open to the possibility that even he isn't. However, the present man is very likely the wrong one, it seems to me.
2006-09-21 05:37:59 · answer #5 · answered by Hermit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like an interest seeker. She has an inferiority complicated even with exuding self belief in her manners & moves. It does look as in case your fiance is immune to her "charms" so do not enable your thoughts be taken over by making use of pride. do not tell your self - "How dare she bypass close to my guy!?" yet really, be at liberty & proud that you've an excellent guy by making use of your aspect! each body has distinct thresholds at the same time as it is composed of tolerance so i will in reality inform you what i ought to do if I were interior an analogous difficulty. i ought to likely no longer confront her & also no longer gossip about her. If some different person talks about her, i ought to tell them to leave her be. She's pitiful in her efforts. playing dumb is relaxing & it truly works! (with the exception of this, she compliments me very condescendingly, yet then turns round and retains such as her cocky, rude attitude and communicate it truly is basically meant for me as well.) <--- i ought to praise her back really sweetly. i ought to attempt to wedge myself into the communique by making use of pointing out some thing completely nonsensical yet relaxing. undergo in ideas, in case you or your fiance are afflicted by making use of her & eventually resign... You lose. do not enter the fray of gossip & bitchiness or you'd be an analogous style. that's my opinion that being gracious & satisfied bypass fortunate can extremely positioned her in her position because she won't be able to do some thing to rile you. She received't change into bored & supply up yet she'll keep in mind that her antics merely makes you look more advantageous acceptable than her.
2016-11-23 13:06:15 · answer #6 · answered by yao 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
break it off with your fiancee first, you cant marry a guy if you feel like that about some other dumbass, dont be retarded you know what to do your just being stupid, you want two diks u skank. but honestly i dont think it will work with either guy, it seems like all you have in comon witht he co worker is the work, one of you leaves the job and your fuked
2006-09-21 05:32:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your not going to try to work on your relationship and run off with a co-worker that MIGHT be interested in you, then go ahead.
Welcome to Skanks-Ville....your going to be there for awhile so get comfortable.
2006-09-21 05:39:41 · answer #8 · answered by Melia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of whether anything develops with your co-worker, you should break off your engagement. If your fiance' is verbally abusive now, it won't get better on its own.
2006-09-21 05:32:27 · answer #9 · answered by hutmikttmuk 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to take time away from your relationship and find out what you really want instead of going ahead and ending up in a divorce.
2006-09-21 05:32:15 · answer #10 · answered by Just me 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋