my friend baby die he was alive for a couple of hours only
this was a surprice to them it just happend they are home now no baby
what can i do when i go to see her
2006-09-21 05:06:17 · 21 answers · asked by conejote_99 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
can i take a baby gif or bad idea
2006-09-21 05:10:59 · update #1
i know them after trying for almost 10 years to have a baby they will keep all the memories
2006-09-21 05:35:05 · update #2
I too lost my baby. She was alive for 5 weeks and died when she come out of her open heart surgery. So i know how they feel. I never got to bring her home. She was in the hospital the entire time. As for what to say just let them know you are sorry to hear what happened and ask if they need anything. What ever you do do not i repeat do not tell them you know how they feel because you don't unless the same happened to you. Let them know that the baby is in a better place and god will take care of him/her now. It will be a long time before things seem normal if they ever do. Just be there to listen and understand what they feel or are saying. There is really nothing else you can say to them. Check in on them at least twice a week make sure they doing ok. If they need company stop by. Offer to do a few chores if it would help them.
I lost my baby a year ago and i am still lost at times and just emotional.
I am sorry to hear of there loss and i wish the best for them. God bless.
It is ok to cry with them. But you also need to be strong for them and be there for them.
2006-09-21 05:15:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
When a baby dies many parents feel isolated friends and family may not know what to say or might stay away. Unfortuantly we live in a death denying society that doesnt allow enough time and support for grieving. No one should grieve alone. When you go to her do not say"you can always have another one " do not say at least yoou did not have time to get close to the baby" do not say"it was gods will" do tell her that "I am sorry" How can I help"I have been thinking of you so much" Ask if she wants to describe the birth ""say I cant begin to imagine what you are going through, but I want to let you to know how much i care" also refer to the baby by his or her name. Just be there for her and let her know she is loved and she has support. Yes you need to give her the gift because she will be keeping keep sakes for memories..
2006-09-21 05:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
My sincere sympathy to you and your friends at this time.Just be there for your friends.I'm not sure if a gift would be appropriate to take however you could take a card and flowers.You can get memorial Bibles so that may be something they could keep and read to help them through this difficult time.You will comfort them by just being there for them, sometimes a hug says more than a lot of words.
2006-09-21 06:32:55 · answer #3 · answered by gussie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO baby gift, very bad idea. That will only stir up all the emotions they are going through even more. Give them some space to grieve before you go visit them unless they request your visit or you call before hand. Its hard enough dealing with the loss of a baby, they dont need all the extra ppl onhand consoling them unless they want it.
Call before you go over to see if they are up for any visitors.
2006-09-21 05:16:51 · answer #4 · answered by feel_n_learn 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you really, really want to give her a gift, look for a baby keepsake box. When a friend of mine delivered a stillborn daughter she kept all her pictures and pregnancy mementos in this box under her bed. It made her feel better to have it near her but not on display, just a reassurance to her that the baby was not forgotten.
She may want to put the baby's onesie (or whatever) it was wearing in the box and a few other things.
2006-09-21 05:17:46 · answer #5 · answered by lindsay74 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just listen to them. Hold her when she cries and tell her how sorry you are. Do NOT offer up cliches such as "everything happens for a reason" or "you'll have another baby". They need to mourn THIS baby. Ask about the baby. Ask the name, what he/she looked like..........parents NEED to talk about their child--to know their child was important and people will not forget their baby.
Please check out : http://www.missfoundation.org/
http://www.mend.org/home_index.asp
http://www.pregnancyandinfantloss.com/
editing to add--yes it is Okay to cry with them. They may find it comforting to know that others feel their grief as well.
2006-09-21 05:15:15 · answer #6 · answered by Cherie 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
that's tough. Especially if it was unexpected. There is not really anything you can do. She will be going threw alot the next little while. Just ask if there is anything you can do, and try to help out where you can. Mabey offer to bring dinner over.(just call make sure dinner has not been made already) Sorry for her loss.
http://www.babylosskit.com/
here is some stuff that might help.
2006-09-21 05:10:35 · answer #7 · answered by sr22racing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this happened to me... I would want some time with my family... I know people think visitors is good when ur in misory but I would want some time.
So give them time alone a day or week... Then slowly I would send some gifts NOT baby gifts but just loving things... call them say I am here if you want to talk or go out or whatever u need. go at it slow is important
2006-09-21 05:16:24 · answer #8 · answered by Christal 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One of the best gifts I received (when I had a miscarriage and was devastated) was that my step-dad brought me a little plant with a ribbon around the pot. If you think about it, it doesn't die like cut flowers, it's a living thing to care for.
2006-09-21 21:34:01 · answer #9 · answered by eddweeness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When people died in my family I didn't like it when they felt sorry for me. Telling my I'm so sorry got really old after awhile. I really wanted someone just to be there with me and help me during that time. I know of people who have lost children and can't really tell you how to handle it, but just be there for them. Make them meals and help them. They will probably never get over this. Just like me, you learn that you have to keep going.
2006-09-21 05:15:38 · answer #10 · answered by Rosey55 D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋