How can My husband and I manage our busy lives, before I burn out?!?

Question

Between my 50 hour a week job, my home, my finances, and my calling in my church, how can I manage them better so I am not running around in circles. I try to do a schedule of cleaning, it is very good, but I can not seem to stick to anything. I am procrastinate (sorry spelling) very bad! I can organice well, and everything I just cant follow through. My husband also works at the same place I do, I am an accountant. We both do house work and I take care of the finances. We want to have children but I really need to get my life organized. Any Ideas?? Oh and we are trying to have children with no luck so far, so I am not waiting for the perfect time because I know there is no perfect time! Thanks

Answer 1

At some point you need to decide what is really important in your life and what can be sacrificed. For instance you say you work 50 hours per week, that is 10 hours over what you should be working. You need to figure out why are you working that extra 10 hours and is it worth it compared to the things your not getting done in your life or not getting to do in your life. You say you have a calling to your church, and while that is admirable, it is time that takes you away from other parts of your life. Is it really worth it at this point in your life to dedicate so much time and energy to the church or could you cut back on that commitment. Doing those extra things is wonderful but not doing them doesn't make you any less of a person or any less committed to god. Finally you talk about not following through with things even though you organize well. The key to follow through is two fold...one we all need a bit more time, if everything in life is scheduled out and there is no time to relax and just do things on the spur of the moment then ultimately things don't get done. The second is if something is important then you have to create a penalty of some sort for yourself that encourages you to not procrastinate.

Answer 2

I'm reading your question and I don't see how you could possibly be running in circles...it's not that bad, toss in the idea that you don't have any children yet and this should be a breeze honey. I'm a mother of five children. I have one grown daughter and four boys who are all in different activities. I work part time, volunteer at the school, take care of all the household duties, the errands, the shopping and the chores as well as five pets and a husband who also plays football three nights a week, plus we attend church. My house is spotless, nobody misses appointments and a time/date schedule is crucial to make things work. Being that it's just you and your husband, I'm wondering why the long hours? Why not 40 hrs a week instead of 50? Schedule cleaning days for Saturday or Sundays only, and have the hubby help out to get it done quicker. With nobody to mess anything up, daily maintenance (dishes, laundry, wiping things down) should suffice between cleaning days. Then once a week, designate one night for the finances, where you both sit down for a few hours and take care of business. If you have no further activities that are straining you, donate the left over time to the church. As far as children....honey, those will come in time. God's probably waiting for you to get this ironed out before he hands you more things to juggle. Relax a little, this is nothing to get worked up over. Stress has a way of delaying things for us. If you are feeling over whelmed, just take a deep breath and ask yourself if what you need to do is life or death? If it's not, put it on the back burner until you get around to it. Life is a series of choices honey, and you can either choose to stress over those choices, or you can actually make some decisions, and take action, so you remove the stress. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 3

If you have the money, try hiring a concierge/personal assistant. This person can do all of your errands and any other tasks you may need completed, giving you and your husband some down time to relax. At least call a couple to get some quotes and ideas. Most of them go for about $20/hour and could get a lot done within that time frame. I would consider getting some outside help at least for cleaning if nothing else. This is not extravagant, as no woman is a superwoman but you can look like one with a little help.

Answer 4

Slow down, and take a deep breath... You mentioned somthing about your calling at church, so I take it that you are a religious person? Did you ever see the bumper sticker that reads "Jesus at the Wheel" ? This is what you need to do in your life.. Stand back and take a look WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT! Do you need to be working 50 hours a week? If you are never home , how dirty could the house be..Now this is what happened to me... I was a workaholic, that made every decision in my life.. I burned the candle at both ends and was strong as an ox.. I paid off 17 grand in debt, plus put 11 grand down on a new house and was getting ready for baby number two.. The house was a big fixer upper and I was begining to strech the credit again. I worked constantly outside the house to make money to work more constantly in the house.. I kissed the kids in the morning when they were asleep and again at night wqhen they were asleep. Sharing morning coffee with my wife was rare... Then I broke my back....Long story-- I became suicidal and thought i was going to loose it all.. This is when I woke up one morning and asked what I was going to do.. Kill My self or let someone else take over...I got down on my knees and prayed.. I prayed for the wisdom to see His will, not mine.. Today I am a stay at home dad. I still have my home and we are all fed and the bills get paid sooner or later.. All I needed was God and willingness to change myself.. You can do this and I will pray for you...

Answer 5

Write down all of your daily/weekly tasks on a piece of paper. Then rank them from absolutely necessary to not so much. Schedule your time to make sure you get the necessary done with spare time after this going to the not so necessary items. A common mistake people make is to schedule everything so tightly they always are in a rush and leave some parts unfinished which leads to more and more to do each day. By scheduling items by rank of importance rather than time, you get tasks complete and can move the unimportant to the next day/week/etc.

Answer 6

I am curious, how much time do you spend on your church? If you want to have a family, cutting back on this isnt gonna send you to Hell. There is only so much time during the day. You need to prioritize. As a procrastinator (I am too), you can plan all you want, but following through can be hard. But if/when you do have a child, that would obviously be your first priority. Everything else is secondary.

Answer 7

You sound to busy, make things simpler, cut extra stuff out. Leave work at the office, hire a person to help clean your house once a week. If you want kids where would they fit, kids do not make your life less stressful. And with the hrs you keep who would raise your kids, these are very serious questions. Slow down and remember less is more.

Answer 8

Maybe you need to cut down hours at work. Spend less time at church and more time with family. Just because you are religious, doesn't mean to have to spend every spare second at church. Set smaller goals, time tables, and stick to it for a week. Only you can make yourself do something. Good Luck.

Answer 9

You just do the best you can. It won't get any easier when you start having your children, it just adds more work for you. You are on the right track in trying to schedule your time. Try to set one goal each day and accomplish that one thing before you go to bed.

Answer 10

Drop some of your activities and reduce time loads