I have been with my boyfriend for a month and i thought he was perfect, until now. He wants to have anal sex but i really dont want to, he says i dont want to because i dont love him. i feel pressured and have told him this. he also says if i let him he,ll ruin me....i,m really scared
2006-09-21 02:33:44 · 24 answers · asked by ruski_55 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
First of all, you don't love him after only a month. You may have feelings for him, but sort that out before you go making a decision like this. You care deeply for him would be much better phrasing. If you don't want to do this, regardless of how you feel for him, he should take your no with the amount of respect that you deserve as a woman. Period. There is no " you don't love me, you don't care about my feelings, I have needs and you aren't meeting them" in between. No one is perfect, man or women. If you feel pressured, then he is taking advantage of you honey, and I am thinking that you are really young and don't have the experience, or that you have been in bad relationships are are naieve enough to think that if you do this, he will love you more. It is painful, you will bleed, and the only reason he wants it is because men loving talking about "virgin asshole" like it is the patron saint of sex. If he continues to berate you and not respect you after you have already told him no, you should tell him that if HE loved YOU he wouldn't keep pestering you to do something that was totally taboo for you. And, if he can't take no for an answer, for GOD"S SAKE make him walk out that door and never come back . You are a woman, and you have that right to be treated with kindness, love, and tenderness. Don't give it up just because you think you are in love with this pig and that he will love you more if you do it. He is worthless, but you aren't. Be strong. Good luck , and God bless.
2006-09-21 02:51:56 · answer #1 · answered by pamalamadingdong_1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dump the idiot now.
Also tell him that u dont like your **** pushed in.
And if he wants to dig in the **** pit maybe he should find a skanky gay guy or a girl thats easy enough.
There is nothing wrong with anal, just some ppl like it others dont. If your bf is threatening u and pressuring u to do things u dont want to do then he is not a good guy to be with.
What does he mean he will ruin u? What can he actually do?
Youve only known this guy for a month...u should b having sex anyway..dont u have like at least a 2 or 3 month rule? C if he is really interested or just there for one thing.
2006-09-21 02:46:07 · answer #2 · answered by chanD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get stuffed. Not to judge but how can you love someone if youve only known them for a month. And if he loved you he wouldnt be pressuring you and would try to see it from your point of view. You deserve better. If he is threatening you dont let him get away with it you must have some dirt n him too. Take the chance leave this loser. What else would he pressure you into doing. Dont let him walk all over you.
2006-09-21 02:41:33 · answer #3 · answered by butterfly_angelmarie321 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you like he says he does, he shouldn't pressure you to do anything that you don't want to.
The pressure that he is giving is disrespectful, and very manipulative. Don't give in. Just think of all of the other stuff that he will pressure you to do, and you have only been together for a month. It sounds like he has a male control issue, not fair to you.
Break up with the controlling jerk!
2006-09-21 02:38:35 · answer #4 · answered by Dre 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off tell him to go shove something up his as* and then come back and see if he still wants to. But girl this guy doesn't respect you and you deserve better. If a guy doesn't take no for an answer move on. You haven't been with him long enough to be deeply in love so get out now.
2006-09-21 02:41:55 · answer #5 · answered by bfm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not that you need another answer like this but....
Dump Him.
You shouldnt have to deal with this kinda bullcrap. Besides one month into a relationship, you DONT love him. You dont even KNOW him yet, except that hes a nasty pressuring bully, not the kind of person you'd want to fall in love with.
2006-09-23 03:38:16 · answer #6 · answered by SillyQuestion 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you have there is a anal fedish.....I have had one of those.I do not want anal sex,it hurts like crap.....I have tried believe me.That crap about "you don,t love me" is just that CRAP....it has nothing to do with love...If he loved you ,and knows you don,t want too,then he would not expect you to do it If he loved you.....Tell him to go find him someone who is into anal sex.....You should not feel pressured ina relationship., and should not be scared either...Don,t let a man dictate to you ,be your own woman.There are plenty of men out there that does not expect or desire anal sex,life is way to short to make yourself miserable.....stand your ground.good luck slickcut
2006-09-21 02:44:39 · answer #7 · answered by slickcut 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't allow anyone ever to force you into something you don't want to do. It sounds to me that he is challenging your dignity and respect and that is something you never want to lose, its yours so keep it in tact. If he is so hung up on anal sex tell him he can do that with his male friends "so just "BUGGER" of! Pun intended! If you feel threatened by him which to me sounds like he thrives on intimidation I would get away as fast as possible with your dignity still in tact. Find a nice guy preferably bigger and stronger than he is and be happy!
2006-09-21 02:58:35 · answer #8 · answered by r g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are way too young to start having sex or even doing hand stuff, if he is pressuring you to have sex you need to tell him you aren't ready. If he doesn't understand you should break up with him
2016-03-17 23:34:27 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, get out of this relationship...first of all he is NO Friend,
second you have only been with each other a month and you are having sex?
Get out and go to your parents or school counselors...
A relationship is suppose to be good for you, not frighten you
2006-09-21 02:39:28 · answer #10 · answered by Annie R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋