How will i get over this. I met and fell in love with a man - the first one since my husband passed away, I never thought i would fall in love again but i fell head over heels & we were supposed to get married. In feb i found out he had gone to visit is ex & he slept with her. It broke my heart but i forgive him on the basis anyone can be forgiven for one mistake. Just over a month ago he wasn't acting himself so i foolishly checked his mobile (which is not like me) and found he had text her to say he is missing her. I confronted him & all he could say was that i should not have checked his phone & placed all the blame on me. Now a month on he still doesn't want to be with me saying that he can't get close to anyone & this has left me feeling utterly destroyed - we were so good together and nobody will ever love him like i do - all our children got on so well together & we could have been one big happy family. I just want it to get back to how it was - it's tearing me apart!!!
2006-09-21 01:39:00 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You know what is good for you and what is not, you grown you don't need help you just need someone to listen. He's a cheater that's why you were concerned enough to check his phone, he has unfinished business with his not so ex and you getting caught in the middle is unfortunate especially since you in such a sensitive state. Be grateful that you can move on, after being married and with someone it's hard for some people to even think about find someone else. You are putting too much stock in this guy, there will be others like him be careful hun and be mindful, it hurts now but it will pass this you know.
2006-09-21 01:53:51 · answer #1 · answered by Solitary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-17 09:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want to get back with a man who makes you feel as though his cheating on you with his ex is your fault. True, you should not nose in other peoples business but if he is to be your husband there should have been no secrets there fore he should not have been hiding anything from you. Don't go back to him, if you think he will stop, you are wrong. He is just not sleeping with her, by the sound of the text, he is obsessed. Do you want to live your life with a man you love knowing you are not the only woman he thinks about? And don't say "no one will ever love him like I do" that is such a cliche. Get on with your own life, you don't need that kind of drama do you?
2006-09-21 01:48:01 · answer #3 · answered by Val 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a shame guys do this , but been there done that. It's not going to go back to the way it was or anywhere close. Honestly the best way to get over it is to get some righteous anger. Don't concentrate on the loss, concentrate on the lying. Remember these are only the things you know of there are probably more. When you're stronger emotionally then you can begin to heal.
2006-09-21 01:47:05 · answer #4 · answered by karen k 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm so sorry. That hurts so badly. It's better you found out now, then if you had married him and then he cheated on you.
I know that's not much comfort. Just remember you're a good person and you have your family and other friends to get you through this.
again, I'm very sorry you got hurt. I think you should let him go. He cheated and he will be the same after marriage.
2006-09-21 01:44:39 · answer #5 · answered by wayouthere 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i believe there's an expiry date in every relationship (whether it's friendship, kinship, love..etc). in ur case, u have already done whatever u can and he's still so hard on u...just let go and get on with ur life. u will probably be better off without him. he's affecting u too much that u even felt destroyed.
remember nonbody's indispensible in this world. lastly, happiness is a choice u made and not a charity from others.
cheers.
2006-09-21 01:47:50 · answer #6 · answered by phy19050 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,its clear by his actions and deeds that he is not interested in being with you,its a little harsh but then is the fact and you cannot afford to ignore it,the sooner you accept it the better for you.why do you want to be with someone who is not even trust worthy,if u forgive him once he'll repeat it again and again,hoping to be forgiven n accepted by you...maintain some dignity and self respect for yourself in this relationship,i suggest just leave him alone,don't show your desperation of being to be with him,that'll take him away even further.....just give it some time and see where time leads you!!good luck!!
2006-09-21 01:46:28 · answer #7 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to deal with his feelings for his ex before he commits fully to you! I know that you want it to get back to how it was but if he is in love with someone else its not going to work!
2006-09-21 02:18:42 · answer #8 · answered by trini_rocker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move on. A man that cheats on you isn't good for you or your children no matter how good you believe it was. It wasn't good enough for him or he wouldn't have been texting his ex with "I miss yous".
2006-09-21 01:42:57 · answer #9 · answered by C K Platypus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't go back. He's trying to go back and that's NG. He buried the two of you with the ex. Sadly, you must move on.
2006-09-21 01:57:46 · answer #10 · answered by needsumthin2002 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋