today my husband and i had a fight and he charged toward me and shoved me into a wall.this has hapened about 3times during our marriage,i feel really hurt emotionally because i was once in a violent relationship and my husband knows how sensitive i am to this behaviuor but he tells me i'm over exaggerating.is it abuse to shove me?
2006-09-20 22:43:02 · 30 answers · asked by poptrash 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes it is abuse to show you. Please discuss with your husband in his good mood and then decide both wants to live together or not.
2006-09-20 22:48:58 · answer #1 · answered by rcs4242 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Something must have irritated him most ! I'm not taking anybodies side, But things accumulate to send somebody of composed nature to go to that level. Frequent denials for sex, not responding to his emotional needs, Non romantic stale relations, & stress at work can precipitate into such behaviour. Women are also working, they also need some emotional intimacy but when husbands are in mood for Romance, usually females withdraw on some pretext or other & they dont get romantic that often! You must be around 35-40, so there are chances that your behaviour is result of Hormonal imbalance if you are in mid life crisis & he also is going thru' the same phase. In this time you need to understand that any further quarrels are going to cause mental depression in him, as he may feel dejected. So let the turmoil be a tea pot turmoil!
2006-09-21 06:43:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is abuse. Any form of physical (or emotional) violence is abusive. The question for you is what to do about it. If he knows how you feel about it, then it is happening because the level of anger between you is rising. There are reasons for that stress and you need to do something about them immediately if you want to stay in this marriage. Insist that you both go to a qualified marriage counselor. If he says no, then you get into counseling and start making a plan for your future. Abuse never stops on its own. Never. It only lingers until the next opportunity and it tends to get worse. Get up and get going. Its not too late, but it is time to act.
2006-09-21 05:49:55 · answer #3 · answered by Isis 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes its abuse, not just physcial but mental abuse too. And both abuses put together are not good. Oh Hun, Like one response said, "Try to get a counselor". Thats all I can say. I've been in a physical relationship and a mental. And both are just as bad..... Do try counseling if your husband will.
2006-09-21 06:43:06 · answer #4 · answered by AngWings 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quarrel between wife and husband is quite common. How u r living with that type of husband. I think u r self sufficient. First u think that about protecting ur individuality against ur husband. Don't think like a old, traditional women. First u recognise ur priorities if ur argument is right try explain it with cool sense. Take a better decision.
2006-09-21 05:49:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. That's %100 abuse. Granted this is the 3rd time in 13 years but why wait for a 4th time? Even better, call the cops and tell them what happened. I guarantee you they will see it as abuse also.
2006-09-21 09:16:07 · answer #6 · answered by questionsfilm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I don't know if it's abuse. It depends on how hard he shoved you and if it left a bruise or not. I mean it's wrong, but I don't think he wants to hurt you intentionally or that he enjoys hurting you since it happened 3 times. I'd say next time he does it, you should get a bat and beat his leg. haha Then it becomes mutual and there's no question of abuse anymore. Good luck, and take my advice. Kick his ass next time.
2006-09-21 07:11:26 · answer #7 · answered by Indubitably 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes. It's an abusive behavior and violent too. What you refer to as "i was once in a violent relationship" is not clear. In any case, you are being abused mentally and physically.
2006-09-21 06:00:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes it is, it is abuse, and you shouldn't have to accept it. You are not over exaggerating in any way. He needs to know how much he has hurt you emotionally. Would he go with you to see a counselor? does he drink and then get violent? try the counselor and see what he says
2006-09-21 05:48:11 · answer #9 · answered by jaynemynx 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It would takes some guy to blow his fuse to shove someone. Have you did something that causes him to react that way? Marriage has to go thru lots of challenges and tolls. Tolerance, endurance, understanding and forgiving are key to happy marriages. Look at it that he just lost his temper and he didn't mean to shove you.... that is why he said you are over exagerating. He didn't mean to hurt you but just a show of his anger.. unfortunately lack of tolerance sometimes. Patch things up with him if possible immediately and he will slimmer down. Remember marriages are built from Love, not anger.
2006-09-21 05:51:35 · answer #10 · answered by Nice Guy 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you've been in a violent relationship before, means that you ended it because you didn't like it. Then think about how you felt then when you knew that IT WAS SOMETHING THAT YOU DIDN'T DESERVE AND YOU HAD TO END.. so does if feel the same with your situation now?
2006-09-21 05:47:30 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋