I have a friend,she was only 23 yrs old,she had a japanese bf,and I introduced her to my japanese boss.Days passed,my boss and my friend goes out for a date,and i never had the idea what was going on between the two of them,one day my friend told me that she was pregnant,and it was my boss who got her pregnant.When I mentioned the problem to my boss,he did not say even a single word,the truth is,he doesn't like the baby,he only wants to give 50,000.00 yen a month until she deliver the baby.Now that she delivered the baby,i could say that it was my boss child coz he really looks like him,but the problem is,my boss doesn't want to recognize the child.I really pitty my friend and specially the baby.Is it my fault that this thing happens to my friend?Please help me,I really felt guilty.
2006-09-20 20:23:11 · 21 answers · asked by carmi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It is not your fault. Your friend and your boss are adults and chose to do this. Do not feel guilty! But try and be there for your friend.
2006-09-20 20:25:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO!!! Please, please just realize that you did NOT make those people's decisions for them! You didn't even know what was what with them so how could it be your fault? Don't believe all those idiots trying to be funny who answered telling you it's your fault because it's no way, no how your fault!
I know that it doesn't appear to be this way these days because everyone always blames someone or something else for THEIR actions, but ultimately, we all make our own decisions and choices in life and it's not anyone else's fault for what happens to them.
The only thing you did was introduce your friend and your boss. That's the only part you played, the only decision you made (maybe just to be nice because your friend was there & your boss was, too? So what else can you do but introduce them? However it cam about, that is ALL you did!)
I understand how & why you feel guilty, and as I stated these days no one will take responsibility for their own actions, but you didn't pull her pants off or his or make any of the decisions that led to your friend and her baby. And she made the decision to have the baby, she can also make the choice to go to court, file a paternity suit, and whether or not your boss wants to recognize the baby or even if he doesn't like it, who cares about that ***? Take him to court so that he'll be ordered to pay child support which will help her and if he doesn't pay, he's out of business, more ways than one, too!!!
So stop worrying and feeling guilty & so bad, ok? Her choices, her mistakes, let her live with them so now YOU can get on with having a great life for yourself! You sound very caring & concerned, just be sure it's about the right things and the right people-YOU!!!
Good luck!!
2006-09-21 03:35:48 · answer #2 · answered by raquelha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO it is not your fault it is your FRIEND for getting involved with your boss. I feel bad for you and your friend. You have a SORRY boss. Tell your friend that she made a bad choice and all she can do is take the money and make the best life that she can for her and her baby, and I don't know the laws where you are from, but a man is suppose to help pay for the care of his child until the child turns 18 or finishes school, she needs to tell him that he needs to help support his child and she will leave him alone . You are not responsible and this is between her and him, you need to let them work out their own problem.
2006-09-21 03:29:45 · answer #3 · answered by whattheheck 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How on earth could it be your fault, you just introduced them, you didn't take them to the bedroom, undress them and hold a gun to their head and make them have sex did you? no of course you didn't, so its not your fault. Its not your fault that your friend and your boss didn't use contraception either. Get it out of your head, yes you feel sorry for your friend, but that's as far as it should go, there are choices in this world and if your friend chose to have unprotected sex, then its her fault not yours.
2006-09-21 03:28:07 · answer #4 · answered by Migz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it's not your fault. Your friend is an adult and had many chances to avoid this from happening such as:
1. Not having sex
2. birth control pills/condom
3. Abortion (not a good choice, but is a choice)
4. Adoption (not a good choice, but is a choice)
If u had introduced her to any other guy, the same thing probably would have happened. If anyone else introduced her to any other guy, the same thing probably would happen. It is not ur fault. It is sad, but not ur fault at all.
2006-09-21 03:26:45 · answer #5 · answered by bebeeangeldust 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No u r not guilty at all.
But how can u say that it is ur boss's child??its a new born baby as u said
2006-09-21 03:26:08 · answer #6 · answered by miss_rimi1989 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not your fault. They're grown-ups. Your boss is a dweeb, but so is everyone else's.
Take photos into work, show co-workers and watch him squirm!
Support your friend, but it's not your fault at all.
2006-09-21 06:00:50 · answer #7 · answered by mithril 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are the biggest sinner ever to appear on the face of earth since universe began!!!
Count Dracula
2006-09-21 03:26:28 · answer #8 · answered by The False Prophet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nope.. its the fault of ur friend for being too naive to open up her legs to a man she doenst even know. true?
come on, they are consenting adults.. whatever they did, they should take responsiblity. and stop acting liek ur guilty.. bec its absolutely not ur fault at all.
2006-09-21 03:50:04 · answer #9 · answered by The Punisher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no it is not Ur fault Ur friend and ur boss decided to go out together u din"t say they could go out and u din't say they should have a baby they did that on their own
2006-09-21 03:48:06 · answer #10 · answered by A.K.A SASA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋