2006-09-20 13:32:17 · 20 answers · asked by paco 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I also have joint custody of my five-year-old daughter.
I completely understand what you are feeling. After four years of waking her up for day-care and coming home to her every night it's tough to be limited to two or three days a week.
The pain and heart ache will never go away. I cherish every second I have with my daughter; even if she is being bratty or just wants to watch TV I marvel that she is mine. When her Mom picks her up on Sunday night I spend the next hour or so just sitting and wishing I was with her.
Love your children. Let them know how much you care. Remember, you will always be their Daddy.
Good luck to you.
D
2006-09-20 14:15:40 · answer #1 · answered by Bugsy Groucho 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does not go away completely. I am in the same situation as you - my husband and I recently separated and divorced. We share custody of our son. When he is with his Dad I miss him all the time. It is a situation that we have to learn to deal with. You have to keep busy. Do things that make you happy or things that you never had time to do before - workout, take long baths, watch movies, go out with friends. It is tough but if your ex is taking good care of your kids you can rest a little easier. Call them every night - let them know you are there for them. The pain will lessen - give it some time. Maybe you could talk to your ex about a mid-week visit (if you share custody week for week) - something to break up their time away from you.
2006-09-20 20:58:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to hear this and my sympathy goes out to you and your kids. I do not think there will ever be a time while they are away that you will not miss them. On the other hand the times you do have them you can spend encouraging them and building up their confidence in themselves. A lot of kids have both parents around them and never get the communication they deserve so make sure they always know that though you and your spouse are separated you both love them lots. I know that most times in a divorce there are bitter feelings but never let your children hear you saying bad things about the other parent, In the end they will love you even more. Write the kids every chance you get and call them. At least this way they know you are constantly thinking of them. When they do come to visit take full advantage of being a parent and just let them tickle your heart as you tickle theirs. Good luck with this and my prayers are for you and your children..
2006-09-20 20:45:30 · answer #3 · answered by The_answer_person 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would not be much of a parent if you did not miss your children when not with them. Will the pain go away doubtful but it will become more tolerable. You did say "joint custody" so you must See them some of the time. I realize that's not everyday but its still something treasure those moments rather than dwell on missing them when not there.
2006-09-20 20:36:26 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The pain does not go away. It will make it easier to accept the situation, even though it will be very hard to get use to them not being in your life everyday. Just cherish all the moments with them and try your very best to make things easy between you and your ex. Hopefully you can be friends. That is guaranteed to take some of the pain away. Good luck. You sound like a good parent. Enjoy!
2006-09-20 20:34:57 · answer #5 · answered by applecheeks 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That pain will never go away. Try making it a little easier on yourself. When your children are with the other parent, try writing to them. I would suggest that you do not overdo your cards and letterwriting as that could be overload for your kids, and agravating for the other parent. But just sending them each cards now and then, just to say "Hello!"... or "Thinking of you." ... or "I really enjoyed our trip to the Zoo last week." and so on, should be acceptable. Keep your writing clear and simple and stay mindfull of their ages. If you took pictures, you could include one or two. You could even include a self-address and stamped envelope, and you might get a note in return.
2006-09-20 20:45:58 · answer #6 · answered by Valerie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as a parent u love Ur children and want 2 be with them and know that their safe if Ur a mother then that defiantly runs high 4 u. but be lucky that u have joint custody rather than no custody of them at all. but don't worry just know that if their with some1 safe and u trust that everything will be okay and that Iyou'll see them again.
2006-09-20 20:36:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's better than having the state take them from you. My brother is going through the same thing. He really misses the kids. But at least they are not growing up seeing mom and dad yell at each other all the time anymore. Just make sure she is taking real good care of them!
2006-09-20 20:36:04 · answer #8 · answered by 123456789girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The pain never goes away, but you adjust to the situation and it does get easier to deal with. As with all hurtful things, healing takes time. Just be thankful for the time you do have and make the most of it.
2006-09-20 20:36:22 · answer #9 · answered by tammie b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have kids, so I can't tell you from experience. But this is my assumption..it's not going to go away. But before you get upset, let me tell you that it's a good thing!! You must really love your kids!!! I don't know how old your kids are, but as I got older, I loved my parents more and more each day b/c I realized how much they love me! Its the best thing in the world!! So, please, don't try to "not" to miss them. It's wonderful that you do!
2006-09-20 20:35:51 · answer #10 · answered by Trish 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋