i dont want to offend her or anything. we have been chatting, we both go to different universities. i asked her if she wants to maybe go out, she said ya. i mostly dont want my parents to find out shes ts. I dunno if it makes me gay or not, but i know how my parents will feel. currently i live with them still til done with college, but either way last people i'd wanna lose is them. I know they wont accept her, because i once dated a girl that was black and my dad was pissed, but he didnt know we were dating i some how played it off that we were just "friends"
i'm not gay or anything, i just like this girl
2006-09-20 08:29:10 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
shes passable but i'm not saying for her to mention her past, just my parents are the kind of people that notice every detail, its disturbing at times.
2006-09-20 09:24:15 · update #1
Tell her, she'll understand. If it gets serious however, you'll have to be honest.
2006-09-20 08:31:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does she fully pass? You want to bring her around your parents and you don't want her mentioning it?
Most TS's want to blend in without being suspected. It'd be very strange for her to just blurt out she's TS.
I don't think it's unreasonable to ask her to keep it on the down low when you're visiting your folks. If you married her, your parents will find out sooner or later. There's always someone who knows her before and after. The only way to keep it 100% stealth is to move out of state and transition while you're still young and there's no public records on you other than name change.
Btw, it's not gay to be attracted to a TS who presents as female and lives as female. If you're into her because she still has male plumbing, you're what's called a TS chaser. I guess it's in between gay and hetero.
2006-09-20 08:35:16 · answer #2 · answered by it 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you're not gay just because you like her. She's a transsexual-that means she's no longer a he, and is fully a she. And if you're so ashamed of your parents finding out, don't date her. It's true, most transsexuals I have met, DO want to blend in, but at the same time, secrets have a way of getting out. I think she may be offended if you asked her not to say anything.
Why would you even have to say you weren't gay if she's a female?
Strange.
2006-09-20 08:55:53 · answer #3 · answered by Agent Double EL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the best policy. If you are ashamed to be dating her then dont date her. If she doesnt want to tell people and I can't imagine she wears a sign on her back then what would be the issue. I can't imagine the contents of her underwear or what used to be there is any of your Dad's business.
Just dont mention it I doubt she wants others to think of her as a guy either.
2006-09-20 08:37:40 · answer #4 · answered by ♂ Randy W. ♂ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations on finding a girl that you like!!!
You should go out with her and find out how serious it is. If you find that you really like her, then you can talk about it. Your parents certainly dont have know if you dont want them to.
I do warn you to be careful when you mention it to her. She might think that you are embarrased by her.
2006-09-21 05:07:13 · answer #5 · answered by andyjudge1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try doing stuff for yourself and not for your parents.
If you want to her shut up when you go out, why bother going out together. It doesn't make you gay at all. Though admit that you are curious. But do it for yourself. And try being honest about your feelings.
2006-09-20 09:01:51 · answer #6 · answered by Augusta B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I called being stealth in the Trans community.
2006-09-20 10:33:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you think your parents wouldn't understand and you think it would be wise not to mention it. It's probably not something she wants to bring up in casual conversation anyway.
2006-09-20 09:09:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain yourself I'm sure she'll understand but as the relationship progresses if it does you may want to be more open.
Luck
2006-09-20 08:49:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her your problem.If she does not understand then she is not worth dating.
2006-09-20 08:33:27 · answer #10 · answered by eva b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋