This is my next chapter in my book. what do you think?

Question

**Frank’s point of view**
I can’t take this any longer. I lay there, curled up on my bed. My uncle had just… finished with me. I hate him, I hate feeling like this.

My arm hurts more then ever now. It’s probably a good thing I didn’t go to school today. He nearly snapped it in two. He’s going to tell Mom I was roughhousing earlier and crashed into a tree. He’s making a doctors appointment with Dr. Bates.

“Come on, Frank,” he said. He walked into my room and stopped. “You won’t tell the doctor what really happened, will you?”

I shook my head. I know better then to tell anyone. The last time I told someone, Joe’s car was crashed into. My uncle said that was him. Nothing – short of an atomic bomb in his stomach, which does sound tempting – will stop this.

But, oh man, do I hate it. The feeling of pain and uselessness. He knows where to hit me, so nobody sees the scars. There are plenty of them. Or the ones they do see, they don’t believe.

[wait for added details]

“I'm coming with you to the doctor's,” he said, putting his helmet away and sitting in the car.

So Joe cares, my brain said. That doesn't mean that he -I shook the thought out of my head; of course… he'd never listen to me.

“Come on, Frank,” my uncle said. He gave me a pointed look as I slipped into the car, wincing as I buckled my seatbelt.
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** JOE'S POINT OF VIEW **
“Frank?” I asked, unsure what was going on.

“I'm fine, Joe,” he whispered as Uncle Marty came up. Uncle Marty is really cool. How any people do you know that would … I shuddered as I thought of what Phil said.

Was he always like this? I knew I couldn't just come out and ask him. For one thing, if it was true, he'd deny it… for another, I had no proof and everyone would think I was crazy.

[one more]

I glanced at Frank. How could – he was supposed to be in school today, he wasn’t. I wondered if it had something to do with his arm, but if it did, -- did he skip school today? Was that why he was acting so strange? Did he skip school and hurt himself, or was it something with my uncle, like Phil suggested?

I had some serious investigating to do.

[finished. what do you think?]

Answer 1

pretty good -- the only thing I would fix would be the spelling

Answer 2

I´m glad i'm not Frank. That's why school's counsellors and civil helpers are needed.

Answer 3

Seems like someone needs a life. You typed all of that? I would be a fool

Answer 4

its OK but you really need to stay on one person instead of three. cause i got confused there in the end. unless its a play.

Answer 5

sounds like he is in troubble.
btw, yahoo may remove this, so you shuld post this in your blog, and leave a link in your question.
this is a very intresting story.