I am Hindu and i love my distance relative girl from child for past 20 years just i came to know she is ?

Question

I am Hindu and i love my distance relative girl from child for past 20 years just i came to know she is coming under sister relation
acording to calaculation of hindu religion. but at same time if i'm missing her in my life that i cannt dream also.anyhow i want to marry her can anybody give me suggestion to marry her.one of my friend ask both of us to convert into Muslim so that by legal we can marry according to muslim law.Is that correct suggest me.Help me

Answer 1

Respect your customs, Think of both your families situation in the society, Imagine your Siblings future, First of all in a country like India & Esp S.India ( i think you are) This is highly impossible.

Above all you both will have no social security.As two way relationship is so prevalent in your place just ask the grand olds in your house whether she comes in any other relationship with you, if so go ahead or else just drop the idea .

Answer 2

"Goodguy" has made the most important point: how much does she love u? I would add: HOW? Is her love for u sisterly or does she see u as her future husband?

Converting to another religion except to save one"s life or out of conviction I consider a reprehensible act. Since u r willing to give up Hinduism, why don't u just become an agnostic or even better, an atheist?

I am not an expert on Hinduism, but I know from experience that in Kerala "Murappennu" system exists whereby first cousins not only marry each other, but they are destined/expected to do so.
So instead of converting to any other religion I suggest u take up residence in "God's Own Country", marry ur "distant" relative and live happily ever after!

Answer 3

Its after all nonsence to think of a religion for a short-cut to get married! You love that girl u cant without her. That is the fact. Now very close relatives get married among Hindus (like cusins). If its distant relation go on. Its your will that matters here- India is such a beutiful country with laws that caters everyones individual endividual need. So i dont think there will be any leagal problem as well

But Genetics warns to keep away from marriages between relatives.

Answer 4

You can not have a happy a happy life living in India while marrying a muslim girl.... please do not listen to these other people who are trying to tell to convert into christianity. It's your belief. You should never give up what you believe in because of somebody else. Haven't you watched the movie called "Bombay".... I say that you both flee in some country like maybe malaysia or sri lanka or somewhere where a muslim girl and hindu man are not looked upon with a questionable eye.... You don't have to change into Muslim to be with her.... Doesn't she respect your religion because if she doesn;'t then you don't need to be with her. If she truly loves you, she will never ask you to convert into any other religion and if you truly love her then same goes for you..... Just whatever you do, DON'T GIVE UP WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 5

It is necessary for you to understand the rationale behind the Hindu dictum that marriage between a girl who could be of a relationship of sister and a boy is prohibited. Medical theories and studies suggest that such marriages amidst near relatives give forth to offsprings with birth defects. However, if the girl is posited in the relationship in the third circle, you need not much both about it, but even then, you may please note that Hindu law prohibits such a marriage and declares such a marriage void. So, the way out will be, to allow either yourself or your relative girl to get adopted by someone not belonging to your gotra or sa-gotra, as you both will be allowed to marry, even by tradition and conventions prevalent now. For such a legal adoption for the purpose of subsequent marriage, please consult a legal practitioner of Hindu Law and marriages. Good luck. God bless you both.

Answer 6

You are not clear in expressing your thoughts. As I understand this girl is a distant relative. How 'distant' ? Converting to Islam is a loop hole. Morally it will be wrong as she is a sister. Some people in Hinduism allow for distant relatives to get married but then you have to consider your children from this marriage. On the other hand, who cares? If she loves you as much as you do her then go for it!!!!

Answer 7

You said that you love this girl but you didn't mention whether she loves you equally? if you share a strong love speak to each other an d call one common person (may be your sister or someone who is good to both of you and understands you preferably of your age... don't involve elders they will never understand love now since the feeling has died for them now) don't ever think of converting yourself in muslim this won't provide solution. I think if she loves you equally both of you must get married without the notice of the objecting people coz after marrying they will agree (which is true but if you think they won't accept the relationship after that then make sure you are financially stable to support each other coz when two people in love cut themselves from society it brings other problems watch Qayamat se qayamat tak.
but first make sure how much she loves you.

Answer 8

Personally I'd avoid conversion for such a matter, find a country where the laws permit marraige in whatever degree of consanguinity are required. Religious conversion should be a matter of belief not who you want to marry. The first question you should be asking is how does she feel about you.

Answer 9

I am not hindu or muslim. I do not understand how anyone would deny thier faith, their religion over getting married to anyone. I could never deny my Lord for any reason. Why should you? If you decide to change religions why not change to Christianity? If your love is not close relation, that is not your mother, aunt, grandmother, cousin, first cousin or second cousin, neice etc. you can marry in the USA no matter what religion you are. The second most important thing is if you do marry what will it do to your relationship to your family and hers? Can you live with it? Could you live with her pain because of it?

Answer 10

Converting is not the answer for ur question.Below is a research that done by scholar in Genetic Education Department in USA:-

Some relationships between blood relatives will be closer than others and they have therefore been classified by genetic specialists according to the degree of closeness, based on the proportion of their genes that they share:
•Brothers and sisters, non-identical (dizygotic) twins, parents and children are first-degree relatives. They have half (1/2) of their genes in common.
•Uncles and aunts, nephews and nieces, grandparents and half brothers and half sisters are second-degree relatives. They have a quarter (1/4) of their genes in common.
•First cousins, half-uncles and aunts and half-nephews and nieces are third degree relatives. They have an eighth (1/8) of their genes in common.

So if parents are close relatives, or there are a number of generations where the parents have been closely related, they are more likely to share the same faulty gene containing a recessive mutation than if they are unrelated.

The risk that those marrying a relative are more likely to have offspring with birth defects or a disabling condition is nearly always exaggerated and perceived as being higher than it actually is.

All parents who are unrelated carry a risk of between 3 and 4% (3 to 4 out of every 100 births) of having a child with a birth defect or disability.

Where parents are first cousins and there is no family history of a specific condition, or where there is no other history of parents being related in previous generations, the risk is approximately double that for unrelated parents. So the total risk of having a child with a genetic condition where parents are first cousins is around 5-6%. Looked at another way, there is approximately a 95% chance of having an unaffected baby.

However, in societies with a tradition of first cousin marriage, and where marriages are usually contracted within the community, many couples are often more closely related than first cousins and consequently their risk may be significantly higher.

Responding to your Friend’s suggustion, Dr. Muzammil H. Siddiqi, former President of the Islamic Society of North America, states:

“This list of preferences in marriage is not mentioned in the Qur’an or Sunnah. It is simply people’s own preference. It is up to you to follow it or not. Generally people prefer to marry people of their own kind. Marriages among people who are compatible to each other in family background, age, education, looks and habits are more successful. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman; (otherwise) you will be a loser." (Reported by Al-Bukhari)

It is permissible to marry within your own family or relatives, and most people like that. However, as Muslims we must keep in mind that there are some relatives who are ***** for marriage. These are mentioned in surat an-Nisa’: 23. Almighty Allah says: “Prohibited to you (for marriage) are: your mothers, daughters, sisters; father’s sisters, mother’s sisters; brother’s daughters, sister’s daughters; foster-mothers (who gave you suck), foster-sisters; your wives’ mothers; your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives to whom you have gone in, no prohibition if you have not gone in; (those who have been) wives of your sons proceeding from your loins; and two sisters in wedlock at one and the same time, except for what is past; for Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.”

So, always think wisely before making any decitions especialy for ur future. All the best!