i was trying to protect my hubby and my mom in law started tellin me that my hubby is a liar and he has anger probelm.im living with him as r paperwork isnt completeed yet.so we r in different countries.she is always tellin me good things about her other son but not about my hubby.also she blamed me for my hubby being lazy( he was supposed to do a part time job and complete his mba).im so hurt.i am always tellin my hubby to find himslef a job.y wud i not want him to do it?i told her that wat she has said hurts and she replied that she really doesnt care.she compares me with her other son's wife.no matter wat i do its never appreciated.i m so depress.i dunno y she doesnt like her son and me.the saddest part is that she gave the proposal and she liked me for her son.y is she treating em like this?all her relative like me but she doesnt.also i asked my hubby to clear things with her but he didnt like the idea and now is upset with me?wats my fault.i was just protecting him.im hurt
2006-09-20 07:37:10 · 4 answers · asked by afriend 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Seems to me that your hubby and his mom have been having problems even before you came around. So dont take it personal if she says she doesnt like you. I am sure she does, but right now is having problems accepting her disagreements with her son. One thing you shouldnt do is tell your hubby to patch things up. Hes going to have to decide on his own time when that is going to happen. The fighting needs to stop but the only ones that can make that happen are the ones that are doing it. Shes mad because she wanted her son to be somthing that hes not and shes blaming herself for the direction hes taken. Even if the direcetion is not wrong she will see it as wrong because its not way she wanted it! So instead of showing that she failed (which she didnt sure hes a great man)shes taking it out on him, hopping he will do what she thinks is best, even if its not what he thinks is. They just have their own oppinon and seem to have a lot of stubburnest in them and thats why they are bumping heads like this. She needs to stop yelling at him and taking out on him and you because hes choseing something differernt than what she wanted, and hes got to understand that his mom loves him a lot and wants whats best for him. And he needs to listen to her , doesnt have to do what she wants but just hear her out. Good luck and i am sure they will end up realizing what they are doing is just a waste of breath and that they need to compermize and meet in the middle for this to all stop!!
2006-09-20 08:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time for your husband to put you first. When you get married your spouse needs to come before anyone else--including parents and children. If your husband is siding with his mom there's a problem. Talk to him about this (when you're both calm) and tell him how it makes you feel to be put second. Also, I'd suggest reading the book "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by John Gottman. It's got a LOT of great tips. Good luck!
2006-09-20 14:42:15 · answer #2 · answered by dcns 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your hubby is as crazy as your mother-n-law. Run before you get too deep. I know all about crazy a** families and they are nothing nice. Good luck.
2006-09-20 14:41:09 · answer #3 · answered by Xena 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
CREATE SOME DISTANCE FROM THESE PEOPLE. ALL OF THEM.
2006-09-20 15:10:01 · answer #4 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋