My partner and I are discussing and planning to have children. I plan to have our first child and my partner will adopt him/her. Our church minister asked about last name and we came up with using both of our last names hyphened with my partners last name last. Any other ideas? I thought about creating a last name using our last names, but our lawyer stated that this would pose a problem.
2006-09-20 07:24:01 · 6 answers · asked by cj 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
My girlfriend and I changed our names to a combo last name last spring, so when we have kids they will have the same names as both their parents.
I personally dislike hyphenated last names because they are so long and if the names of the parents don't mix, then it can be really horrible.
I would be curious why a lawyer would tell you that it would be bad for your child to have a last name that matched both their parents. That is the opposite of the advice we got. We were told that it is just easier when everyone has the same last name.
2006-09-20 16:49:23 · answer #1 · answered by dani_kin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son was the result of a previous relationship, there was no discussion needed. He always had his father's last name. After his father and I divorced, I retained my married name for the sake of my son and not wanting to confuse him.
My partner and I got together when my son was almost eight years old. He's known my partner as another parental figure for longer than not. She's been more of a parent than his father ever had. His father chose not to be an active part of his son's life. I do not regret that his father hasn't be all that active in his son's life because my partner has been a wonderfully positive role model for him.
We have a couple of friends who have two children from invetro, the first one born to one partner and the other born to the other partner. They share similar names in that the first child has her biological mother's name hyphenated with her adoptive mother's name. The second child, a son, has the reverse name.
The don't have a problem with it.
I have another couple of friends who created a completely new family name that both partners took on as well as the children. Yes, it was costly to do this, but they feel it was well worth it for their sence of family unity.
2006-09-20 09:28:03 · answer #2 · answered by DEATH 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the hyphenated way would be best. Maybe one of you should change your last name so you both have the same and then the baby would have the same as well. Just a thought.
2006-09-20 07:28:42 · answer #3 · answered by Squirrel 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you have the right idea wit the hyphenated last name .but how will you decide who's last name goes first ?
I personally think your partners name should go first and them yours.I mean since you are carrying him/her.
2006-09-20 07:43:51 · answer #4 · answered by I dont trust no Bush but my own. 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My partner and I had this same issue...
we took out last names...eg: Smith - Brown...and combined them....Brith
Went to the court house and leagally had our last names changed ....
Our children have our combined last name
2006-09-20 07:59:57 · answer #5 · answered by bopddbop 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your partner should adopt you technically then she will be the babys grandma but at least you will all have the same last name.
2006-09-20 07:45:08 · answer #6 · answered by ♂ Randy W. ♂ 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋