Hey,
I'm a girl and have a girlfriend. A year ago I cheated on her with a guy (we live two hours flying distance form each other), and i broke up with her to be with him (at a distance, seen him once). I got back with my girl cause i still loved her and she's lives close. Now I'm talking with him on msn a lot again and I'm afraid I'm falling in love with him again. He told me he misses me and would love to see me again. I don't know if I should break up with her, she sais she'll die or be lonely for ever if i do. We're arguing a lot these days..we see each other 24/7, I'm getting quite sick of it. We are about to go live together...but actually I think we're a bit too youngh for that anyhow. Main problem is that i love her, but she's difficult. Anyways, I need advise :)
P.S. i do love her...gay-haters: dont even start..
2006-09-20 05:51:49 · 28 answers · asked by so_highly_evolved 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
When was the last time you got to spend some time with just you? What are the good things about you that you can share with a partner? What are the things your partner will just have to accept? You're playing a cruel game with people who do care about you. Know who you are, don't depend on the love of others to fulfill the need to love yourself. Take the break and learn what makes you tick, what you bring to a relationship and what you need your partner to bring to the relationship. Share who you are instead of depending on someone else to define you.
2006-09-20 06:06:50 · answer #1 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ahhh.. Well I'm not bi or the other... But I think in your situation... You need to weigh it all out. What are the pros and cons in your current realationship, and the pros and cons in your ex's? Ask yourself why you cheated on her the first time and why? Then you need to find out does your ex really love you? Does he just miss you because he misses your entertainment or pleasure? Is it a game? These are the things you need to think about. You just started talking to him and he feeds you the sweet lines and you leave your girlfriend. You also need to think maybe the reason you and your girlfriend are fighting a lot because you see her all the time. 24/7 with each other is not healthy. You both are getting on each other's nerves thats why you two are fighting a lot. See who has more pro's and con's and you go from there.... Sometimes, we don't have to make that decision... Sometimes you have to let them make it for you.... If you don't understand what I meant by "Sometimes you have to let them make it for you" You will find out at the end it you don't know what to do and go with the flow... Just don't pick... Let them pick. Do you understand? I have never had a bi relationship and always have been with men but I'm looking it as a two guy situation. Last but not least, love is blind.... Our feelings play tricks with us. You may say well I'm leaving her for him because I think we might work out, but once you make that decision later you might realize you really did love her and want her back and realize you shouldn't have done that and then opps, you made another mistake. Anyways, I hope this help you. I wish you well. Take care.
2006-09-20 13:03:43 · answer #2 · answered by Azn-lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like what you need is time away from both of them to sort it out. Don't be afraid to be alone for a little while, like maybe a week to do your own thing. No calls to them, no messenger, cut yourself off completely from all communication. Within a week I am sure you'll know exactly what you want. It could be the reason you switch back and forth is because you just need something different. Don't play out a good relationship, you need to give it room to breathe and grow. If you're with your girlfriend 24/7, you need to take a break. Even people who live together and are married aren't together ALL of the time throughout the day.
2006-09-20 12:57:53 · answer #3 · answered by Robin R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Difficult one. If your relationship with your girlfriend is getting hard and you are arguing a lot, it may be better to end it. You can always love her, no matter what, for love really doesn't end. Seeing someone 24/7 can be VERY hard. My husband just had two weeks of of work and spent the whole time on his computer. So I can understand how you can get tired of seeing her sometimes. If the guy treats you well, give it another shot. Try to just get to know him a bit, spend some time with him as friends, if you still feel like being with him after you get to know him, end it with your girl. Good luck.
2006-09-20 12:58:29 · answer #4 · answered by gin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok to b honest, it doesn't sound like u really love her. sounds like she's just available and u haven't found anything better. She took u back after u cheated with a guy the first time, and now you are thinking of doing the same thing to her. that's bull! If u r so sick of her, tell her. BE HONEST. she deserves at least that from you. if she is so difficult then quit playing with her and move on.
If she is trying to manipulate you with that 'I'll die w/o u' crap, then let her know that is not what you want for her, and you both deserve to be with people who will make you happy. however you do say it, say it before you start or resume something with someone else. you obviously do not honestly love her.
2006-09-20 13:00:59 · answer #5 · answered by bluest storms 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your thinking about breaking up with her this much, then you should do it. Not because of the other guy, but because you don't know what you want. I would suggest not being with anyone for a while until you know exactly what it is that you want in a relationship and who you want. Maybe you have "grass is greener on the other side" syndrom, (which it's not.) and need time to think. Either way, you owe it to her and yourself to be honest with her and think it out before more people get hurt. Best Wishes.
2006-09-20 12:57:21 · answer #6 · answered by Nicki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are very confused right now. The best thing would be to listen to your heart. What do you think is the right thing to do? Maybe you should tell your girlfriend that as much as you love her, you should try doing some thing apart. Like the old saying goes "if you let it go and it comes back to you it was ment to be, but if it does not come back to you, then let it go". Sometimes if you take time out to figure things on your own, the answer will come to you.
2006-09-20 12:56:30 · answer #7 · answered by lpogue2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really need to make up your mind here. Being together for 24/7 is hard. It can make you think again about your relationship of course.
You need to think this over, do you really think that this guy who you have only seen a few times will be the one for you?
If you do, then be honest with your girlfriend.
If he is not the one, still you need to talk to your girlfriend.
You are bout to go live together, but with doubts like these, i'd think again. Please be honest with her, or you willruin anything nice that may still ly ahead of you in either one of these relationships.
2006-09-20 12:56:49 · answer #8 · answered by Joyce R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not be with someone if you are having feelings like this, and you should never stay because she says she will die. Those are just idle threats and normally don't mean anything, she will be sad and upset but she will get over it.
You on the other hand need to quit playing games with her emotions, ether break up with her or stop trying to see other people. You cant have your cake and eat it too.
2006-09-20 12:56:39 · answer #9 · answered by Joy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey there, sounds to me like your heart is with this boy, your girlfriend (who I have no problem with you having a girlfriend) may say thay she will be lonely for the rest of her life, but chances are she wont, why dont you go and see youre ex, see if any of the old fireworks comeback, and if they do, talk it over with your girlfriend. Im sure she'll understand.
Good luck,
and god bless,
Fiona
2006-09-20 12:56:22 · answer #10 · answered by Fiona M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋