we broke up 3 months ago after a 2 year relationship, and a couple days after we break up, she has sex twice with my now ex-best friend after he conned her into sleeping with him, saying he'd be there for her forever then left a week later. she almost killed herself with regret (not made up she was sent to the hospital for over-dosing), and three months later we just got back together, and she wants to emotionally and physically cleanse herself. we lost our virginity to eachother after a year and a day of being together and she's the only one i've been with. she wants to cleanse herself of my ex-best friend so it's almost as if i've been the only one she's been with also. is there anyway she can possibly do so? also, i broke up with her so it's not like she cheated on me, she just needed someone to be there for her and that's how she felt would be the best idea to do so. boy did she learn..
2006-09-20 05:02:09 · 39 answers · asked by ddrfreak51 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sorry for the situation. I understand what you are saying, but I don't know what your question is. Are you asking if you should get back together with her?
2006-09-20 05:06:19 · answer #1 · answered by Mariko 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Once you sleep with someone you cant take it back. No matter how bad you feel after wards. This is why you shouldn't sleep with any and everyone! If she was feeling sad, down, and depressed there were a lot of things she could have done to make herself feel better. She crossed the line when she slept with your best friend. I wouldn't give her a second chance! But hey, its your life! She cant take back the fact that someone else has slept with her! She just feels bad, because you didn't sleep with another girl. If you did, then it would have been like y'all were even. But since you didn't she now realizes how much you love her, and she knows she messed up! But like I said, the fact is she slept with your best friend, and the action ruined a friendship! If you can take back the sl**, then you can forgive your friend. And your friend didn't make her do anything she didn't want to. She wanted the d**k and he gave it to her. So stop believing everything the tramp tells you. Right now she will tell you anything to get back on your good side. She slept with another man! And she cant take it back. She needs to get over it and accept the fact that her p*ssy isn't pure anymore! Her sh** is tainted and nasty! I have no sympathy for sl**s who use friends against each other! Leave the b**ch, or continue to accept the fact that when y'all have a fight, she will sleep with anyone! Then blame them for it. She doesn't deserve another chance!
2006-09-20 05:21:05 · answer #2 · answered by Ty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As far as I am concerned, what is done is done, you cannot take it back. You can always forgive and forget. No matter what, she still had sex with your best friend, and you cannot pretend it didn't happen or that is it is cleansed away, some how. She can repent and ask for forgiveness for her sins with her God, maybe that will make her feel better. Although you are not married so there is another sin. Hopefully it was a hard lesson learned and she will think twice before acting on emotions without thinking about the inevitable consequences.
2006-09-20 05:10:00 · answer #3 · answered by amalia372005 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive and Forget???
Forgive her but don't forget. She should have know that the best friend was off limits and he was your buddy he should have been the last person she went to for comfort. Twice, he didn't con her she wanted to. I'm sorry but it's a lame excuse for the con unless your girlfriend thinks so little of herself that she would believe something like that.... Your best friend should have known better too.
She has serious emotional issues she needs to deal with first. Life is tough, what is she going to overdose every time she makes a bad decision!!
I can see why you are so attached to her and it's nice that you two want to work it out but it's going to take time lots and lots of time!!!
If she truly regrets it then she needs to forgive herself and then you need to forgive her!!
Good luck in your relationship!
2006-09-20 05:22:18 · answer #4 · answered by Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're being a great boyfriend. I wish all were so supportive and understanding as you.
She obviously needs stability and support. I'd only caution you to be careful not to enable any bad behavior. There's a fine line sometimes between "enabling" and helping. That being said, just continue to be there for her. Help her through this difficult period. Be understanding and let her know you love her - no matter what.
Time will heal all things. She will never forget the experience, but the immediacy of it will diminish over time. This will, I think, help her to feel "cleansed" of the experience.
2006-09-20 05:07:46 · answer #5 · answered by HelpfulHanna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only thing you can do is to be there for her and make her feel like things won't change between you two.
I recently slept with my boyfriends best friend. I felt the same way i regretted it with all my heart and wished it never happened. Now don't think I'm a cheater. Me and my bf were just friends w/benefits at the moment. What happened between me and his friend made me realize how much my bf means to me and i wanted to try and make more of it then just F*** buddies.
What happened is in the passed and she needs to understand that things like that happen all the time. Weather it was a weak moment or something you wanted to experiment with. She feels more guilt because she realized how much you mean to her and she let herself (she had a weak moment). Keep re-surging her and let her know how much she means to you.
2006-09-20 05:20:37 · answer #6 · answered by dodgergirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To quote Professor Harold Hill from the musical "The Music Man":
"The sadder but wiser girl for me!"
You are LUCKY. Now she knows that your ex-best friend is a jerk and YOU are STILL AROUND. You might want to schedule a session with a counselor if you think it would be helpful, but from what you wrote it sounds like you are both already on the right track now. Good luck to you both! :)
2006-09-20 05:07:04 · answer #7 · answered by Paul H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you and she had broken up, you're right, she didn't cheat on you. But as far as cleansing herself of your ex-best friend, then unless she has a Delorean with a flux capacitor built into the firewall, it isn't going to happen. Everyone we interact with physically, we take a part of them with us and it stays with us forever. Its something she's going to have to deal with. I hope she can come to terms with it. But she fell for the same line that many women fall for. "I'll be here with you forever" is a line that men use on women who are either in a unsatisfying relationship or fresh out of a relationship.
2006-09-20 05:08:55 · answer #8 · answered by maccleod1074 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think this girl needs some time to get emotionally healthy. Start by being her friend and see what happens. And unfortunately, you can't cleanse yourself of the people you have slept with
2006-09-20 05:04:32 · answer #9 · answered by flashypsw 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She can't cleanse herself! Thats the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. Jesus Christ, what does she think this is? Warm and Fuzzy Cupcakeland? Tell her to suck it up and deal with what she did. She cannot make it go away. If she did'nt want it on her conscience she should'nt have done it. People really just can't take any responsibility for anything they've done can they? She feels bad becasue she thinks she should. Just tell her to put it in the past and deal with it.
2006-09-20 05:06:03 · answer #10 · answered by kmankman4321 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can't "cleanse" yourself of being with someone, especially if no protection was used. If you guys still love each other then deal with it and move on, broken hearted people do some very stupid things. Just count this as a learning experience and move on to better times with each other.
CT
2006-09-20 05:05:36 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋