my bf had a huge porn collection when we met and when we finally got together he got rid of it all, but he has payperviewd a few movies and it seems he waits for me to fall asleep so he can watch whatever he can on tv involving naked women. ive told him that this makes me feel like crap and he still does it. it almost seeems to me like he cant control himself but when i confront him he says thats how he is and i cant make him stop. he doesnt seem to care how i feel about it or he wouldnt do it riight? what should i do?
2006-09-20 03:58:48 · 15 answers · asked by drgn0016 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
hrm.. i know it may make you feel bad.. but hes a guy and some guys just seem to have to look at porn all the time..
there isn't much you can really do to change him.. he's obviously not going to stop ..
what you need to do is try and remind yourself how wonderful you are.. :) and that he loves you enough to get rid of his huge collection in the first place :)
2006-09-20 04:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hon, you could be perfect in every way cook like Betty Crocker clean like Martha Stewart, and be an absolute Hell-raiser in the Bedroom...and I guarantee your Mate will STILL watch porn...Let it go.... what is it about Pornography that has you so uncomfortable?? That is the question you should be asking yourself....I know all women are different some are more modest than others but Let's face it even If I had Johnny Depp in my Bed every night I would still watch romance movies or read a silly trashy novel in the Bubble bath...Why??? Because it doesn't reflect on our mates it is a natural curiosity......At least he respects your wishes enough to wait until after you go to bed so you aren't exposed to it.....You need to realize It may not make MUCH sense why Men watch Porn 24-7 but the fact is they do....It doesn't make them perves or weirdos, just ..Men....and Hon as long as he loves you and he makes you happy and is being open, honest and faithful too you ...why take that away from him....Just think about what I said I'm not trying to change your mind just open it a little...Here is something to ponder ....If you take the wedding ring off and look thru it you can still SEE members of the opposite sex.......
2006-09-20 11:16:15 · answer #2 · answered by Erin O. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While his insatiable porn habit can be rather inoccuous and harmless, it can also be some subconscious outlet for deep seeded unhappiness with the relationship. Guys like looking at naked women and porn; its like our shopping. However, his refusal to give it up despite your uncomfortable stand on it is reason for pause. It could be that he just misses his bachelor days and is living vicariously through the porn. Has he ever suggested watching it together? If that's the case, he may just be trying to spice up the love life. But, if he's purposely waiting until your asleep, its almost like he's hiding it ... and he's picking the porn over you. It sounds like you need round 2 of that talk. If he still is stubborn about his late night nudie flicks, then maybe you guys need some separation or to move on, if it really that bothersome to you.
2006-09-20 11:07:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hi-
Well being a male I think I can say that most men are pigs. I mean that in the nice way(lol)-----You see his viewing porn as something that competes with you-ie "why does he need that when he has me" etc.
Men look at it and say-wow nice jugs-----It doesnt cross his mind that this really really upsets you-
The bottom line is if you tell him to stop and he doesnt, then what?
whatever that "what" is you must stick to It. I looked also-not movies and my wife and I would argue or more often the silent treatment--i never saw it as a threat to her-but what i did finally see was that I was not going to risk a marriage over boobs.....so i stopped-perhaps he will to
2006-09-20 11:10:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There's really nothing you can do but ask him to control it to a respectable level. Men do not nurture memories the way woman do so most men revitalize their memories of sex with porn. Because females are more emotionally minded they preserve memories longer and always have these to fall back on in clarity. So when females think of sex, their minds have easily accessable veiws of sex to light their flame--as one might say. Jimmy_paxson at yahoo
2006-09-20 11:10:56 · answer #5 · answered by jimmy_paxson at yahoo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him b , whats wrong about it , the only thing that can b wrong in this situ is if u r not getting any, if that is the case move on, if not let it go he is just a normal guy that likes porn so normal. Y dont u try and watch it together, cool stuff.
2006-09-20 11:04:57 · answer #6 · answered by leed 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i did go through that and it made me so upset and feel like a peace of **** who is not good enough to be looked at.. so u can eather watch this stuff with him and it might even make your sex life a little more interesting,or u just do the same thing like he does...if he has no problem with that something is wrong..
2006-09-20 11:13:14 · answer #7 · answered by starlight 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If this is important to you then tell him how important. If he still shows no improvement then dump him. There are men who will care enough about you and what you feel is important to at least respect something like that.
2006-09-20 11:04:13 · answer #8 · answered by Crossroads Keeper 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Some ppl like watchin porn... its nothing to do with you... u can atleast be happy that he aint sleepin with some other woman... u can join him in watchin porn might improve ur sex life too..
2006-09-20 11:03:40 · answer #9 · answered by UK GUY 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If that's the worst he does, you are lucky. Lighten up a little and be glad he isn't cheating on you.
2006-09-20 11:03:21 · answer #10 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋