From a Christian Viewpoint
If the Bible (God) says that a Divorced woman should NOT re - marry, c`se she`ll be called an adulteress (whore), howcome they still try to justify their cases...
After all - On the very first day of the first marriage, they have promised in front of many a people (and God) "untill death ...."
What type of "Love" was the first relationship based upon, if the second relationship is also based on "love" ?
I`m divorced too (10 yrs now) and still keep my promise to my ex (and God) regardless of her whoring life ...
A divorced man or woman has infact still a living parter out there, which means that they are THEMSELVES just living adulteress lifes with their second partners ...it`s just common sence if you consider your first vow made infront of winesses ...
We talk about commitment to God ...
2006-09-20 01:47:09 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
People should not divorce at all,They should not commit to a promise if they can not keep it.In good and bad times It is a team and if you never give up on your self, you should not give up on your spouse either. If we where not materialistic will a love for $ and possessions we would be happy for every in marriage just like poorer country's.
2006-09-20 01:57:14 · answer #1 · answered by Andrea M 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you completly read your Bible, then you already know that the only acceptable biblical divorce is for adultery. If this was the basis behind your divorce, it is biblically acceptable and you are no longer tied to your original commitment.
You have obviously put a lot of time and thought into this matter. But have you talked to your minister about this? It is common in today's fractured religious communities to take part of the Bible but not the whole. Make sure you are not doing this to yourself.
The Bible is not to be taken as we see fit -- in bits and pieces, but rather as a whole. If you look, the "marriage ceremony" is not in the Bible at all, just precepts for that union.
If you go back to the original Greek and Hebrew, you will find either 4 or 5 different words which are translated in the English as "love". Do some more checking on this for yourself.
Since you have been divorced for 10 years, and are still keeping your promise, you are doing what you feel you must to keep the vows you made. However, you commit an error as a Christian with the statement "her whoring life". You are judging. "Judge not, lest ye be judged". Goes along with taking the whole Bible.
It is wrong to make the vow in the first place if your ideal is "well, if this doesn't work, I can always get a divorce." Marriage vows, or any promises, should be taken very seriously before they are taken, as well as after. It is obvious you took your vows seriously, your ex-wife did not.
Remember, God will judge each on his own merits, not by the actions of others. You will not be held accountable for your ex-wife's actions. Neither will she be held accountable for yours.
Talk to your minister (pastor, elders, deacons). Do not let this consume you in misery. God's designs (as put forth in the Bible) are for his children to be content and blessed in all things. Allow yourself to enjoy your life as God has given it to you. "It rains on the just and the unjust". But talk to your pastor. Pray with him. Pray yourself. The answers are there -- take your bitterness away and find them so you too can move past your divorce. I'm not saying you should rush out and remarry. If that goes against all you believe, then don't do it. But do not allow all your bitter feelings to color your enjoyment of the blessing of being allowed to wake every morning, and allow yourself to savor all the good things God has blessed you with.
But the breaking of vows is always wrong - it makes the vow a lie, which is also wrong.
2006-09-20 10:14:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your desire to adhere to such a strong standard is commendable, especially after such a long time.
The thing is, the "divorce and remarriage" issue is not as clear-cut as you've made it out to be, and I think you've put yourself in a hard position not only for your own life but in dealing emotionally with the betrayal of your ex-spouse.
Divorce is not God's intention, and he hates the damage it causes to relationships. On the other hand, even Jesus specifically permitted divorce in the case of infidelity on the part of one of the spouses, as per the old Mosaic law -- because "men's hearts were hard."
[i.e., people did not want to repent, and continual infidelity on the part of one spouse was a violation of the marriage contract.]
Regardless of whether or not it is permissible for your wife to remarry (as she was responsible morally for the divorce), according to Jesus, remarriage has always been an option for you as the "innocent" party.
[Reasoning: If divorce is permissible in God's eyes under certain circumstances, then the marriage no longer exists -- which means you are eligible for remarriage. If this was not the case, divorce would not have been legal in God's eyes at all. You are acting as if your divorce never happened, although legally and morally you have been divorced.]
Since you seem to have a very strong opinion on this issue, and because this issue has consumed so much of your life, I would recommend exploring the scriptural basis for divorce and marriage in more detail just to make sure you are not causing yourself unnecessary pain and frustration.
Divorce is very hard, especially when the spouse is the one who committed infidelity; but the tone of your post suggests that you've had a difficult time moving past the terrible thing your ex did to you. Your life does not have to be driven by the pain of your divorce; you are free to live anew. God wants to work forgiveness in your heart and free you from the anger you've felt for such a long time.
The best book I've read so far on it has been "Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible" by David Instone-Brewer (link below).
Don't let your spouse's betrayal continue to destroy your life and spiritual/emotional well-being a whole decade after the marriage ended. God wants more for you than that.
2006-09-20 09:08:28 · answer #3 · answered by Jennywocky 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
People should not break they're vows, but if the other person has broken theirs than its not the innocent ones fault. Therefore if the innocent one is able to move on in there life and they meet another special someone than it should be ok to re-marry...even in gods eyes because the previous cheater is dead in the "Love" part of their marriage anyways. So why should the innocent suffer? Besides haven't you heard? A divorce is the death of a marriage.
2006-09-20 08:59:09 · answer #4 · answered by Charmed 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
To me it sounds like you have the case of jelousy and disdain towards your ex for divorcing you.
That divorcement scripture is not very well understood/explained.
But I am against divorce, regardless where it came from, it causes more pain and suffering than just a fighting marriage. Especially when there's kids involved.
But, any relationship can be founded on love. Love is something that you have to work for and then work to keep it going. You keep it strong by serving, forgiving, compassion, loyalty, and more. That love can die when you choose to starve it. Then you can find another love if you nurture that one.
And it is possible to love more than one person (romantically and any other way).
Good luck, and hope your pain and anger subsides soon!
2006-09-20 08:51:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
In order for what you are saying to be true then both partners need to be devoted Christians. Even then they get caught up in the I know what God wants for me they forget to stop and ask God. How do you know what God wants all the time if you don't ask him. As for love you are forgetting that there is different kinds of love and the thing is to find out what kind of love you have before you get married. What could be true love for you could be puppy love for the other person.
2006-09-20 08:56:47 · answer #6 · answered by sscott12414 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You sir are an absolute idiot! and quite frankly, I am tired of morons like you stating your opinions as fact because they are not. Why don't you just admit what a dependant and needy person you are an choose to take no responsibility for your actions. There is no god, people are people, flawed at best. You have no right to judge anyone.
2006-09-20 09:31:13 · answer #7 · answered by ready4it45 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For Buddhism point of view, once you are officially divorced or ditched by your husband, you can remarry to a man. The most important is you have to be faithful to your current husband. Adulteress is a women who is not faithful to her husband.
Vows are to keep but be flexible with situation.
2006-09-20 08:56:19 · answer #8 · answered by AAA 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Read the complete words in the bible concerning divorce. If a man puts a woman away by divorcement, then he is allowing her to remarry.
2006-09-20 08:53:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its wrong to break the marriage vows yes-however,don't go believing all that you read...from what ever book it is-most books contain equal parts of fiction and truth...and the bible is no exception.(and yes before you think of having a go at me....i HAVE read the bible.)
2006-09-20 08:59:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋