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I AM NOT SURE WHERE YOU ARE TRYING TO MAKE FRIENDS AT. MAYBE JOIN A MOTHER BABY GROUP IN YOUR TOWN TO MEET OTHER MOM'S PLAN A PLAYDATE FOR YOUR BABY. CHURCH IS ANOTHER GOOD PLACE TO MEET FRIENDS.

2006-09-20 00:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by baptism_by_fire_2000 6 · 0 0

I not sure. Heck, I am a guy and I meet women with babies everyday. I not see why you should not find some other mother's around. Some Church's have a Mother's Day Out program. Now this more for a woman to do whatever, but, it may open the opportunity for a friend.

2006-09-20 00:24:57 · answer #2 · answered by Snaglefritz 7 · 0 0

Have you thought of going to one of those play schools with your baby, all the moms there get on great with each other and a lot of them were feeling out of it friend wise before they went along, most towns, villages and cities have them, either the Citizens Advice will be able to tell you your nearest one or the local education service will, OK it might only be the odd morning each week but you could take the initiative and invite them to a coffee morning at your house to get to know them better and make friends, good luck.

2006-09-20 00:54:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

yes it can be but i joined a mother and baby group and you will make friends there because they are all in the same boat as u. as a mum u do need do get out alot and these groups can be great for just that.

2006-09-20 00:22:06 · answer #4 · answered by joanne h 1 · 0 0

try joining a college class on an evening or something.

there must be some kind of mums and toddlers group somewhere?

2006-09-20 00:18:35 · answer #5 · answered by Senorita 3 · 0 0

it is easy to make friends while you are a baby
but there is difficulity to make friend as a lover.

2006-09-20 00:32:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Maybe you are a shy person, or struggling to come to terms with your new role as a parent, and are therefore feeling less confident that normal. People generally find it hard to approach less confident people, even shy people. One of my best friends was painfully shy when I first new her. To the point that I was rather wary of her, because she would look at people but never speak to them, if I spoke to her, she would answer in one word. I thought she hated me and gave up, it was only when she had a problem and came to me that I got to know her, and realised how painfully shy she is.

I am not shy, and find it easy to meet people, so it is hard for me to understand, however, I have noticed that often shy people feel they are being watched, and ultimately judged because of their behaviour, views and opinions and even how they dress, whereas some of my more confident friends and myself, dont care what others are thinking and tend to feel that if they cant be bothered to get to know the real me, then they arent worth investing in.

It comes down to the way you see yourself. You have plenty to give a friendship, you have a right to have friends and to be valued for who you are as an individual. You also have a basic human need for friendships and associations with a wide variety of people. You need to come to terms with what you think is holding you back before really being able to move on and change it. You need to believe in yourself. List all the qualities you would look for in a friendship. Very often we look for things in others that either mirror who we are or what we want to become. So make the list on paper and then look at it and underneath write down the positive qualities you think you have that people would like in a friend. Maybe the two lists will be the same, maybe they will differ slightly. Underneath that, write down qualities that you feel you would like to have, this will give you something to work towards. Remember, the more open and honest you are with both yourself and others, the easier it is for people to open up to you, to share with you and to develop emotional intimacy, the key ingredient for true friendship.

About meeting friends if you have a baby. Babies need to socialise too, so do you and it is pretty easy to combine the two. If you like swimming, most public pools run mums and babies sessions. They are usually cheap and an excellent way of bonding with your baby, giving it a valuable skill and of being sure to make friends with other mothers. quite often in the changing rooms and mums are trying to get ready, if their baby is crying or unsettled, another mother will offer to help out. Dont say "no its okay" or mutter thanks, engage the mother in conversation "say thank you, that would be great, I wont be a second" if the mother doesnt respond with much follow up with questions about their child, we all like to talk about our children, keep the conversation going by saying things like "yes mine does that, I thought it was just me!" you dont need to be false about it, but that way you are asking about that person and her life without directly prying into it, and sharing your own experiences and showing that you have nothing to hide.

If a conversation goes well, dont be embarrassed to ask the person if they will be at the next weeks session. If they say yes, then say that you'll see them then. If they say they wont, for whatever reason, dont see it as a personal rejection, but tell them it was nice meeting them and their baby. Even better if you can use the baby's name and engage with the child. You never know when you will see that person again and they will remember you and then be more likely to strike up another conversation. They may also decide to come to the next session, or the one after that because of the interraction you shared.

Try to have as many social outlets as you can, sooner or later you are bound to get to know people. Try baby massage classes, or better yet, mother and baby groups. There will be plenty of mothers in the same situation as you and they are there purely to socialise during what might otherwise be a very isolated time in their lives. Plenty of places run them, including your local council, but the best ones are often run through churches. They are usually free (occasionally a small charge for tea and biscuits, depending how much money the church has) and the people running it are not out to convert you, but because it is their Christian duty to extend the hand of friendship to people, they will be more likely to strike up friendship with you, they will also know the other group members and may well think you and a particular person would get on, and can introduce you and start the conversation off, thus taking the pressure off you. Also, plenty of mothers use church run groups, even if they are not church goers themselves or even if they have no faith or belief.

Just remember not to be afraid to talk to people, that you are worthy of friendship and deserve it. I wish you luck, God bless.

2006-09-20 00:38:19 · answer #7 · answered by Tefi 6 · 0 0

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