the sex is basically non existent he don't try it on and neither do i. What can i do (im not the instigator type). Please help
2006-09-19 23:44:37 · 29 answers · asked by Carly T 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
rent a porn...really
2006-09-19 23:45:56 · answer #1 · answered by spyderman1212 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sooooo----the thrill is gone......you might think the SEX is non-existant but I would bet you dollars and a doughnut he's getting his cookies somewhere!!!!
Be the initiator....sometimes leading the fly to the spider needs a little trickery..... Don't be what you call the instigator...just take the role and the initiative to start something that both of you can't finish!!
have fun
2006-09-20 06:49:09 · answer #2 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try talking to him about it. He probably thinks the same thing as you. Maybe together you could start again in bed, and try being the instigator for one night and see what a difference it does make!! Trust me it will do just the trick.
2006-09-20 06:48:08 · answer #3 · answered by rockin mermaid 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want a more active sex life with your husband, you need to start getting over your shyness and express what you want. If talking face to face is difficult for you, write him a little note. Put it in his briefcase, lunchbox, or mail it to his place of work with his name but no return address. You can be sweet with something like: miss you, darling, or be a little (or alot) naughty with: meet me, our bed, 10:00 p.m., to bring: chocolate syrup and whipped cream, leave your clothes and inhibitions at the door. Don't be afraid to communicate your desires or you'll not be getting any (pun intended).
2006-09-20 06:56:04 · answer #4 · answered by chafer17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have to give a little to get a little.
Go to any store that sells body oils. Offer to give him a full body massage.Start with the basics and then work your way to the front.He'll enjoy it I promise and you will enjoy getting the intimacy you've been longing for.
Old fashion lotion works as well. Good luck
2006-09-20 06:55:24 · answer #5 · answered by kandn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if your uncomfortable being the instigator....initiate a bit of a cuddle and kiss and let things lead from there.
otherwise you can talk to him....in order to have a happy and healthy relationship you need to be intimate.
Good luck
2006-09-20 06:49:06 · answer #6 · answered by askaway 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the truth is, you're probably "normal"
i don't believe in all this reant a porn crap / sex therapist bullshit
do we really need to go outside to find a solution to a problem, which probably doesn't exist in the first place?
try talking about things, approach him in bed, TAKE the first step
good luck
2006-09-20 08:16:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy some sexy underwear,and start everything slowly-kissing&snuggling,be gentle to him,and sex will come next!
It's your husband,you have to iniciate.Don't let someother woman instigate before you!!!!!
Believe me,men like that...
2006-09-20 09:06:47 · answer #8 · answered by Yasna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, u wldnt be asking this question if the lack of sex didnt bother you. So, why not try and make the first move? Or u cld try talking to him abt it. Tell him that u need it as well. I dont know how I wld survive with no sex.......
2006-09-20 09:37:32 · answer #9 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speak to a Doctor about enhancing your sex drive theres loads of stuff u could try
2006-09-20 06:48:03 · answer #10 · answered by Elektra2217 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
me and my man have been together for nearlt 10 years now n we dont do it as much as we used to talk to him and find out what kind of things hed like you to do for him and him for you every now and again wear something that makes you feel sexy he will soon get back into the habbit of it
but remember being intimate doesnt always have to be about sex you know
2006-09-20 06:51:47 · answer #11 · answered by bexieboo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋