I'm pretty much a loner, That's is not the problem because, I am satisfied with that.. I have two friends, which they both mean the world to me.... although one of them lately has been acting different she has met this other girl, her and the other girls husband works together, so I can understand how they might get along considering they're both married and they can relate, in which I'm not married so I can't about that or have nothing in common in that certain aspect although my best friend and I use to hang out quite a bit, she'd always call me, I'd call her, etc, but since this girl has came into the picture she has not called me or anything really it seems, I call her and all she talks about is this other girl, about how their going to do this, or how their going to do that together, or how they hung out and did something... the other girl lives closer to her then I do (I live on the other side of town, its a pretty big town) so I can't really get over there because I can't drive, and this girl can.. so I know maybe thats why she hangs out with her alot is because she is "available" or w/e you want to call it, but still she never wants to hang out with me anymore it seems...and she hasn't called me that much since she's met that girl so... thats not really a good sign is it? I know some people are going to say "Don't be jealous" but I can't help it I guess because this girl is stealing one of my two best/only friends away from me.. What should I do? please any advice/suggestions from anyone.. be nice please!
2006-09-19 19:57:59 · 10 answers · asked by ♥Butterfly Kisses♥ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
hey i've been through that before, and it really sucks.
try and suggest doing something. or suggest that all of you do something, including the other girl. cuz then maybe you will realize why she likes her soo much.
in the meantime try and branch out to find other friends. hang out w/ different people. find a new interesting hobby. maybe even a boyfriend. whatever your interested in. hope this helps. :)
2006-09-19 20:03:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i have faced this problem a lot. I am very very shy so it is hard for me to make friends in the first place. hear is what i did.
1.) i just started writing notes to her/him and told them how i felt. then i would ask(in the note) if their is anything that is bothering them about me and if so to please let me know so that i can fix the problem. because i believe that any misunderstanding or mistake should be cleared up right away so that you don't loose a good friend over a little misunderstanding.
2.)i would send it to her in the mail so that it would capture her attention a lot better. also i do it that way so that she/he could read it when she has time. because maybe when you talk to her, her other friend is around so then she wont want to talk to you about your (her/his and your) friendship out of fear of loosing that friend.
3.) i would ask myself these questions:
what do you miss the most about being with this person?
is this person really a friend or just a person who is fun to hang out with?
has this "friend" been here for me when i needed them?
do we have the same or very close to the same line of thinking? does she/he need a little "break" from me? i know after a while of always being together it gets me frustrated and i feel like I've had enough for a while. and i tell them that i need a break for a day or two and i explain why.
last i would look back to our friendship promise.
our friendship promise is a note book that the both of us have and we put our meaning of friend in it. then we both sign it and date it. ITS VERY FUN AND CAN MAKE OTHERS JEALOUS. when we do stuff together that we both enjoyed we right it down so that we will always have something to look back on and talk about for years to come.
our definition of FRIEND is:
F=forever friends
R=ready to talk to if something should come up.
I=in case of emergency always their to help.
E=enthusiastic and energetic.
N=never puts you down or make rude comments about you.
D=does not run away to someone else when their is a problem in your relationship.
good luck and i hope this works for you it has for me.
and here's a big hug for you in hopes all goes well.
2006-09-20 04:06:20 · answer #2 · answered by malinda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The dynamics of your relationship are changing, and most of us don't like change! It makes us uncomfortable, mainly because it requires us to do something! Not all friendships last forever, we can outgrow people or sometimes their needs change. Try to use it as an opportunity to get out and find something else that you would be interested in doing. Your relationship with this friend has already changed, you are just still going through the stages of accepting that. If it's not nurtured by both of you, it won't survive this. I know all of this sounds like so many cliches, but...when one door closes, another one opens
2006-09-20 03:16:25 · answer #3 · answered by bamagirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I too do not make friends quickly or easily and sometimes through life my best friend will start to hang a little more with someone else. It hurts because it makes a big change in your routine. Sometimes its the other way around too and you don't even notice it. Anyway just know that friends and relationships change and it is the change that hurts most if you think about it. We get addicted to our routines and its hard to adapt.
Hugs
2006-09-20 03:08:18 · answer #4 · answered by geomoto 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest that you maybe start looking for someone to, not replace her, but fill in the gap that is left.
Humans are well known for moving on when they find something new. it is just how it is. You could always just ask her what is going on with the friendship. tell her how you feel and that you want to stay friends.
2006-09-20 03:10:57 · answer #5 · answered by navymt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok here you go.. Well the both of us more or less are in the same shoes... I'm having dat kinda problems too last 3 years ago.. Coz I only hang out either wit my cousin or my best fren.. Hmm but after the both of them has been taken away (with their frens) .. I was left all alone.. Du u know how it feel? But I have to be strong.. really strong to be all alone by myself... I have no one to turn to.. But God noes I'm alone and has brought dis guy to my life.. We become buddy soon after.. And he always spend tyms wit me.. N try to b there always.. (but we're not a couple) sincerely only frens.. How much I appreciate his existance.. So now u!! U have to b prepare dat both of them will lve u too one day.. N b ready to accept a new frens into ur life.. Sumtym beside the two frens, there other hu's more understanding and appreciate us out there... Regardless of sex(es)... I noe now how u feel.. but u shld let her go "atleast u noe she happy now wit her new fren" Believe me one day she will look for you, she will feel lonely without you.. Coz atlast my dis 2 frens came back to me.. But remember we shld accept them with open arms..
2006-09-20 03:58:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are several types of friends, there are friends in need and friends indeed. Maybe there is something you don't know about these two women. Maybe they are more then friends, maybe lesbians, and that is why they hang out so much.
2006-09-20 03:16:48 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand Wat your going through its really hard when you lose your best-friend it hurts all you can do is tell her how you feel and than maybe she will realise that she's lost her bes friend just hang in there she'll come round so hold your head high GOOD LUCK.
2006-09-20 03:07:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk with your bestfriend and let her know how you feel. Then go silent and give her a break for her to think about what ever you'll say.
2006-09-20 03:59:45 · answer #9 · answered by Rebecca 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
aw that actually made me kinda sad to read that. uhm... i guess get your license and get a bf thats hotter then both their husbands combined? that would put u back on top.
2006-09-20 03:00:38 · answer #10 · answered by Oh, Natey-O! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋