i say i am bisexual but i am not sure about that. ok i am physicaly attracted to guys but no man has yet to come close to actually getting me off with penatration. oraly yes. i am way more physicaly/sexually attracted to females. but guys dont turn me off just not on i guess. i am just really confused. am i bi but leaning more twards females? does anyone else have this same problem that can tell me how they are dealing with it. my boyfriend is getting upset that he cant well please me and i am not to sure what i should tell him. ok i am rambling any comments sugestions would be helpful... thank you
2006-09-19 19:18:57 · 15 answers · asked by cyntha 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
i have been with females in the past..
2006-09-19 19:22:34 · update #1
You can make both of you happy...by simply inviting women into the love nest. He will go absolutely wild and you will be happy as well. What a lucky guy. This is a win/win solution. By the way...I wish I was in his shoes.
Good luck.
2006-09-19 19:22:35 · answer #1 · answered by An Unhappy Yahoo User 4 · 3⤊ 4⤋
Well, a lot of straight women could say that they don't get off with intercourse, either. It's just much easier to hit the sweet spot with fingers or a tongue, and I had a hard time with it myself, no pun intended, when I first started having sex with a guy.
I know it's funny to give this kind of advice in this section, but orientation is much more between the mind than between the legs, and I'd hate to see someone use an imperfect sexual experience as the basis for their self-label.
2006-09-19 19:59:26 · answer #2 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look, your sexual PREFERANCE has more to do with body image, positioning and "turn ons" than sexuality.
An example would be; dark haired partners, big butts, latex, leather...etc.
That's sexual PREFERANCE.
If you're confused about your ORIENTATION that's different, and I believe you may have the two confused.
Only you can define your sexuality, and honestly, I don't see why it should matter. If it gets you off and it's with another concenting adult human being, fine!
It's only those who are insecure about their being a sexual being that need to define sexuality in such narrow perameters.
I'm bisexual but lean more towards being a lesbian. Most men don't turn me on, but that's not to say I'm totally against ever having any sexual relations with men. I'm in a committed relationship with another woman, one that has lasted ten years. I'm not about to go and cheet on her just to test the waters. I love her and that's all that matters.
2006-09-20 03:43:39 · answer #3 · answered by DEATH 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm straight, so I don't share the same dilemma, but I'll try to help anyway.
You said that you are physically attracted to guys and you are physically/sexually attracted to females. This means you are bisexual, but seem to lean towards the female end of the gender spectrum.
Keep in mind that perhaps the men you've been sleeping with just aren't very good in bed, which is why they haven't satisfied you sexually. Meaning that, your problem may lie with specific individuals rather than men as a whole.
I'm guessing the reason why females are able to satisfy you sexually is that females (in general) are more focused on their partner's needs and intuitively know what their partner wants. Men, however, are usually inept when it comes to other's needs, so you need to let your boyfriend know what satisfies you sexually. Each woman has different turn-ons, so your boyfriend isn't going to know what you like unless you let him know. Yes, this isn't very romantic but sometimes it's the only way.
Also, just tell your boyfriend that you're bisexual. Most guys find it a turn-on anyway, so I doubt he'd break up with you. Just be direct and honest.
2006-09-19 19:28:01 · answer #4 · answered by Natasha 4 · 3⤊ 3⤋
Heh I'm a bi and I can say that although I lean in more towards guys, for your situation, I think that the boys you've sexually interacted with were just bad at what they did or not that great to your standards. Girls tend to be better at giving other girls pleasure because they know what they want and what they don't like. Guys normally do what they want to do.
Go with whom you like more, physically, and personality-wise. You have a boyfriend, aren't you somewhat attracted to him by his personality? I love mine, and I'd experiment with a girl, but I wouldn't date, a lot of girls I know I'm just better off being friends with.
If your boyfriend doesn't seem to be pleasing you, you be on top (I think you know what I mean), you just may find a whole 'nother world at the top =P.
2006-09-19 22:05:58 · answer #5 · answered by cyn1c4l 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
well I can ramble as well...I think you are definitely bisexual but I think you already know that...penetration by a male doesn't seem to do it for you..but oral does...well if you want to go to basics it's really all friction...but of course there's a lot more to sex than that....you say that you are more attracted physically and sexually to females...doesn't that give you an answer? I don't know what you should tell your boyfriend..only you can guess at that because you have all the information...reread your question..I think the answers are all pretty apparent...good luck:)
2006-09-19 19:27:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
You might be bisexual, but it sounds more like you're just confused. You may have a fear of pregnancy. (Attraction to women is safer than attraction to men where pregnancy is concerned.)
You may also be so preoccupied with the idea that you are unable to concentrate on enjoying sex.
With sex you need to simply relax and have a little fun. Let him seduce you. Let him find ways to turn you on. Even if you were lesbian there would be ways to turn you on, and they could be done by women or men.
You might need some counseling.
You don't give your age, but if you are young and relatively inexperienced you probably haven't totally formed your sexual preferences yet.
My advice would be to take a more relaxed and less worried approach to the entire issue. It's absolutely okay to be a virgin, by the way. Maybe you should not even push sex at this time in your life.
There are many factors that could bear. If you had a very religious upbringing this could bear on your attitude toward heterosexual sex and it could also bear on your attitude toward homosexuality.
You can be heterosexual if you want to be. You don't come across to me as a committed lesbian.
Take your time. Don't worry about it so much. Life is full of many good things, and sex is just one of them. I think you will love it when the time comes.
The time may be a while.
2006-09-19 19:29:31 · answer #7 · answered by Warren D 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
YOU DO NOT NEED A LABEL, YOU JUST DO WHAT YOU FEEL LIKE DOING IN THE MOMENT YOU FEEL LIKE DOING IT!
It's like being worried all the time about "who do I love more, mom or dad, Am I a Mamma person or a Daddy person?" or "What do I like better chocolate or strawberry, Am I an ice cream pervert?"
2006-09-20 00:27:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Its easy. Your sexual preference is ME. Unfortunately, we can't always get what we want, even once we know it.
Sorry. THe best you can hope for is to shake your attitude that it is the guys responsibility to get you off. Take control of your own sexual experience when you are getting boned. Put some effort into it, be responsible for your own pleasure.
2006-09-19 19:24:24 · answer #9 · answered by cyphercube 3 · 2⤊ 4⤋
you can be a lesbian and still find a man attractive. just because you find someone attractive doesn't necessarily mean you want to bed them. and contrary to popular belief not all lesbians are man haters
2006-09-19 19:59:00 · answer #10 · answered by not_nekked 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋