I'm 19, have been with my boyfriend for a couple years, and we've been talking a lot about marriage lately. If he does pop the question I'd want a fairly long engagement period, waiting a while to actually get married. Is a long engagment good for a relationship?
2006-09-19 17:57:38 · 10 answers · asked by andy_pann 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Unless a child is coming, it takes 6 - 9 months to plan a formal wedding. After a year, an engagement becomes long. Given your ages, I'd say it would be advisable. You ask a mature, intelligent question suggesting you would be able to do some significant work on mutually interpreting what you want from the marriage.
2006-09-19 18:02:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good job asking questions before you make a large leap.
Long engagments work if both people want them. They really give you a chance to plan your wedding, and get to know eachother really well.
you can go over all issues:
who will stay at home or not with children
do you want children
how many children
will you have pets
do you like to move alot or stay in the same house
who will scrubb the bath or toilets
what day is laundry day and who is responsible
if someone does stay home from work they are not work 24 hours a day while the other works only eight, (taking care of children is an all day thing)
who will pay the bills and what will the bills be
how much will you have to buy new clothes a month
so on so forth...most people forget that marriage is a lifetime, its best to know what your doing
2006-09-20 01:05:57 · answer #2 · answered by rebeccalynn_dj 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not always. Long engagement does not always mean that you'll gonna have a very good married life together. It does not always mean that when you settle down, you already know 100% of your partner. Sometimes, long engagement makes you fall out of love or outgrown your love for each other. It sometimes, tires you out. It always depends to both of you. Communication is really important to every relationship but long engagement is not always a guarantee of a good and lasting, more fulfilling life together. I heard so many lovestories that fell apart due to a very long waiting time. One partner met another, one partner discovered that he fell out of love, and so on and so forth. Have a really serious and deep conversation of what you really feel and what you want to be with your relationship right now. Goodluck! Hope you'll have a happy life together!
2006-09-20 01:06:21 · answer #3 · answered by Bartypurple lass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I were engaged for 2 years before marriage
2006-09-20 01:00:05 · answer #4 · answered by yager19 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is. I plan to ask my gf to marry me in December, and we won't get married until May 2008. This would give us a 1 year 5 month engagement period. Obviously we have discussed getting married, and she knows a proposal is coming she just doesn't know when.
2006-09-20 01:35:01 · answer #5 · answered by Jason 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on the individual. You have been together for 2 years. You should know what he is like by now. People change once they live together, so a long engagement wouldn't prove a thing.
2006-09-20 01:08:49 · answer #6 · answered by FL Girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The longer the better. Let all the demons surface. All the wolves pop out of the sheep's clothing. All the chickens come home to roost. If it's love it will last. If not, whew!
Seriously, you both need time to grow up and learn who you are. Give it lots of time.
2006-09-20 01:01:56 · answer #7 · answered by Chris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me, long engagemnets give the opportunity to cheat on your spouse and still have the bond. It will make you realise why you got engaged in the first place and learn to appreciate your fiancee. Also long engagements give opportunity to learn more about his family, and whether it's worth marrying him.
Good luck.
2006-09-20 01:05:40 · answer #8 · answered by Mr. Pleased to Please 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it all depends are you both out of college and working? in college still ? are you ripe for the picking if so i would not wait another yr . but enough time to plan a super wedding which will take a long time anyway
2006-09-20 01:03:05 · answer #9 · answered by terri e 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hell yea. cause when ur engaged its like u r married but not quiet there. a long onee is d only one dat makes sense. its like a trial period to see if ur really gettin wut u wany. dats wut im doin now.
2006-09-20 01:01:51 · answer #10 · answered by jp_todd@swbell.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋