I've been married for 5 months now and I do love my husband very much but the problem is this:He just doesn't do it for me sexually and he never really has I just don't have the heart to tell him this..........I just don't know what to do....I don't want to fool around on him with someone else but I am starving for sexual satisfaction......any suggestions?.............
2006-09-19 16:26:03 · 34 answers · asked by vanessa b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to talk to him and tell him what you like. Men love to be successful. If you tell him what pleases you, it's almost certain that he'll do it.
If you don't know what pleases you, then google "female masturbation" and learn how to please yourself. Then, you can tell him.
2006-09-19 16:29:54 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Did you consider this issue before walking the aisle to the altar? You have been married only 5 months. What will things be like between you and your spouse in 1 year, 5 years, etc.
Eventually either you or him may seek companionship outside the marriage, or there will be a break down in the relationship. Best for you to talk with your husband now - while things have a chance of being corrected.
2006-09-19 16:42:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you guys need better communication. It's hard for some people to have good communication espically when it comes to sex. If you truly want to be satisfied you need to tell him what you like or try to guide him. Does he tell you what he likes? This is the only way a couple can understand each other is if they communicate about EVERYTHING. You can buy a book and ask him if he wants to try certain things but what I think works best is while you two are being intimate guide his hand down there and show him what you like, that way he will know for furture experiences and eventually he will learn all of your magic spots hahaha. I hope things work out and don't be afraid to tell him or show him what you like or you will only be stuck in the position that you are in now. OH! also porno videos help too cause they show men making women feel good and HOW they do it. It's kind of like an instructional video hehe. Have fun! :)
2006-09-19 16:35:47 · answer #3 · answered by dabster 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it's going downhill after 5 months it doesn't sound like it's headed for happiness ever after. It depends on why he doesn't do it for you sexually and whether you think that with some teaching or counseling that he could. One thing is for sure if you want to stay married you're going to have to make some changes between the two of you. Good luck.
2006-09-19 16:29:16 · answer #4 · answered by jljdc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a problem that so many women ask and so many live with. When making love to your husband, do you just jump right into it or do you have fore-play? Most people having sex only last three to five min. In fact I was in a chat room some time ago and a female actually referred to her husband as eight seconds man. That's something real harsh to say about any male. If your sex is finishing too quick for you then you have to find ways to get stimulation before actually engaging in the act. This might mean more fore-play, watching erotic videos before to get you in the mood and even trying to control his body speed so he doesn't go on wild like a seventeen year old. Too many times men don't look at a woman's faceal expressions to know how sex is going for them. Personnally I like to ask my wife how it was everytime after we are finished just to let me know if I hit the right spot or I need to try harder next time. You have to understand that sex is not just for him alone to get his own satisfaction. Its for both of you. And in order for him to understand this, you have to let him know where he is lacking and what you think needs to be done to improve it. Try exploring new moves, new places and spur of the moment acts that will drive you all insane. The longer you take to work it out with him the worst it will be on both of you and eventually you will cheat. I personnally think that all men should ask their girlfriend or wives how was their performance to know what they have to do next time around. Most men just can't understand that if sex is done correctly, a woman can come several times but for a man it will always be the same- just one time and no second chances right after. So try to do it right the first time round- your woman will thank you for it
2006-09-19 17:09:20 · answer #5 · answered by osito 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hai! I will not provide you an answer which will offend you & seriously i have no intention of doing so, but my sincere advice to you is to sit down and have a heart to heart talk with him. Explain everything that you have written above to him personally, gently & affectionately. Look into his eyes & give him the puppy look. Don't let this be a barrier to your life. Respect his decision and ask him to put himself in your shoes. The sooner you talk, the better because you are just married and i don't want you or your life to end in mess. Sorry! Thanks,
2006-09-19 16:56:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dabster has the right idea......the only thing I can add is to reiterate is the communication thing. Get all nice and naked and slowly start playing. Talk gently and slowly about what you like and dislike. Take him by the hand and show what you want. I had to do it with my wife and we have been together for 13 years and still going strong. Good luck.
2006-09-19 16:44:25 · answer #7 · answered by asbratcher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This kinda falls into the for better or for worse category....
You need to talk to your husband. Maybe he is trying to hard to please you and in the process isn't pleasing you. You need to tell him your likes and dislikes. Maybe you could show him how to do things to please you.
You need to find the heart to tell him. You don't have to criticize him, just in the moment, tell him what you want. He may very well find it a huge turn on that you are directing him and could be an extremely satisfying experience for you both.
2006-09-19 16:32:30 · answer #8 · answered by ktjokt 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learning to satisfy yourself is imperative for someone in your situation. Learn to masturbate and what makes you really go over the top; then TEACH YOUR HUBBY how to do it ! Just tell him it's more intense (not that he's ot doing it for you) and you want to share that intensity with him! He'll be eager to learn and interested! Make it easy for him; "Yea, I like that", "easier, very gentle", "that's not comfortable". Guys aren't born lovers ya know! Go for it and stop "starving"! Godloveya!
2006-09-19 16:29:58 · answer #9 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ask him before you get into doing it, that you want him to try some different things with your body. Moan and groan to let him know when he is getting closer to your satisfaction point. Let him know when he does something right, let him know when he does not. Good Luck!
2006-09-19 16:33:51 · answer #10 · answered by tm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the biggest part of marriage is sharing share with him just what it takes to get you to the big O lead him youll both enjoy it i have been married to my hubby for a long time 28yrs and i still take him by the hand and show him just how to do it it turns him on even more to see me so in charge im useually shy
2006-09-19 18:36:06 · answer #11 · answered by Msdeb gee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋