Please help! I have been in a relationship for 5 years now and have been hurt numerous times by my girlfriend. She breaks promises left and right. She hasn't in the past 6 months. When she gets mad at me for instance she will say very hurtful things like she don't want to be here with me anymore or crazy stuff like that. I believe she really loves me and like I said she hasn't done anything in a while. I am 30 years old and can't play mind games, but I am very very in love with her and can't see myself without her EVER! She said that she sees how she has hurt me and swears to never do it again and hasn't since she promised that. She now does very sweet things for me all the time and tells me how she feels about me (good) all the time. I think she has realized it now and really doesn't want to do it anymore. But my problem is that I think did she really mean that stuff that she said or do people really say stuff they don't mean when they are mad? HELP!
2006-09-19 14:31:01 · 9 answers · asked by Please help 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
People say stuff that they don't mean when they're mad.
If she meant the things she said then she wouldn't be with you at this very moment.
One time my fiancee was so mad at me for ignoring him that he called me a whore. I knew he said it out of anger but it hurt me. I said to him, "If I am such a whore then why are you going out with me?" (this was before we became engaged),he felt guilty afterwards and promised not to do it again, and he hasn't since. I know he didn't mean it because I am anything but a whore. He knew those words effected me in a bad way and would get me mad and that's why he said them.
Don't worry, she loves you. Good Luck!
2006-09-19 14:47:09 · answer #1 · answered by ♪Msz. Nena♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People say all sorts of things they don't mean when they're mad. Some people don't realize that when they say it, we keep it in our minds and replay it over and over again. For that person, it's probably said and forgotten. It's hard to get over things like that but if she has truly changed, give her a chance. I've been on the receiving end of the mean words and I just let it go. I don't like to hold grudges. You should do the same but I'd keep your guard up a little. I mean, you don't want to be her punching bag anytime she feels like it. Good Luck w/ everything.
2006-09-19 14:40:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person can say bad & hurtful words when angry, sometimes they just say it but didn't mean it. Anyway, I think that is the human instinct.
With regards to letting go of your hurts, unless you do it, you will continue to suffer. All I can say is, do not dwell in the past for it will only stop you from moving on. Just remember, past is a history and future is just one day away from your present. If you wont let go, then you wont be able to find the way to the future.
2006-09-19 14:42:45 · answer #3 · answered by dtmc542006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people say really hurtful things that they don't mean when they are angry. It is not right but it happens. If she really loves you she will treat you kind and not just when she is trying to make up. If her verbal abuse continues you are better off alone than living with that.
2006-09-19 14:35:59 · answer #4 · answered by Robin N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a girl for 9 yrs and im 31. it's hard , i know. i have clinical depression and for her it's hard, but i can be very mean sometimes with my bipolar, but in this session, i think a really good talk needs to happen. she needs to tell you the truth of how she feels and if she really does not want to be with you then so be it, and if your that unhappy, it's time to move on, as hurtful as it is. sorry babe.
2006-09-19 16:26:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People say things in anger that they don't necessarily mean.
I would suggest that you both go to counseling. Then you can sort out your problems and you will know for sure if she is in this for life or for games. Good Luck!
2006-09-19 14:35:36 · answer #6 · answered by Va Party Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put it this way: take her for what she is doing now. Try to forgive her for the past and see a counselor so that you can talk over the situation. The fact is that she is now trying to make up for the past so who knows she May be trying to change.
2006-09-19 14:53:07 · answer #7 · answered by sexonsight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
at the start, this isn't EPIC!! I were by an epic lesbian love triangle, or maybe with the reality that it really is dramatic (hey, it truly is what lesbians are) this isn't that loopy! and enable me quote you "i'm more advantageous vulnerable to trust the different female as hostile to my female friend b/c she has a bent to be more advantageous basic...." it is your answer proper there. in case you've faith some different person over your gf, you're probable more advantageous acceptable off with out your gf.
2016-11-28 03:04:42 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people really do say stuff they don't mean when mad
2006-09-19 14:37:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋