Custody question for Fathers....................................?

Question

This is to all the fathers who ex's have physical custody of there children (primary guardian)

Since the mother has physical custody how does you're visitation work, how many days out of the week or month do u have youre kids?

I have mediation tomorrow with my ex, and I was going to go for Joint Legal Custody (so we both have a say in the childs well being) and was going to give my ex physical custody. But after doing some reading, when it comes to visitation with a mother who has physical custody, I may not get to see my kids much. So I was thinking maybe I should go with Joint Legal and Joint Physcial....even though I know we wont see them 50/50 but I know I would most likely see them more then 2 days every 2 weeks...Anyway, to any divorced or single fathers, tell me your custody arrangments and visitation, I'd like to get some insight before tomorrow, thanks!

Answer 1

Well I'm not a father but I do know what you're going through. When my ex and I divorced I gave him legal and physical custody of our 2 children because it was in their best interest. What I can tell you is this; if you have a good relationship with your ex you can write out your own visitation agreement, if not you will go by the standard order of visitation (In most cases that is every other weekend AND one day 6-9 pm every week).
If you two are still on speaking terms and able to consider what is better for the kids it will be so much easier for the both of you to sit down and write out your own. I now have physical custody of my 2 kids because circumstances changed but my ex is allowed to see them whenever he wants to...he just has to call me and let me know.

Answer 2

My son just went trough this. He lives in Michigan so I'm not sure where you are and if the laws are the same. He has joint custody with the mom having the physical custody. He has his daughter from 6pm Thursdays till 6pm Sundays. They alternate holidays, and he gets her for 5 weeks in the summer. These 5 weeks are broken up - 2 week, 2 week, 1 week. He has to let the mother know in writing by May 1st of each year as to when he wants his weeks in the summer. If he doesn't do this then it is up to the mother which 5 weeks he gets his daughter. One of the parent's has to pick the child up, the other drop the child off. Each of the parent's has to provide for the child (food, clothing, etc.) while she is at their house. Medical, school activities, and other things the child may want to be involved in such as: music lessons, sports, etc. has to be discussed between the parent's and agreed upon then they split the cost. If they can't agree on a particular thing (one parent wants, the other doesn't) then the parent that wants the child to do the activity has to pay the whole cost. Instead of having to pay child support, my son requested that the mom be allowed to claim the child on her income taxes each year. This has worked out very well for my son so far and it's been 8 years now. I truly hope this helps you in someway. Best wishes!

Answer 3

You are getting into legal jargon, which I think is incorrect. If you want to be able to see them half the time, then ask for half the time. Joint Legal custody is a lot different than Joint Physical Custody. There are certain laws that apply to both which you need to consult on before tomorrow. Plus, mediation is usually just that, its usually NOT binding, so be careful before agreeing to anything.

Answer 4

what did you think was going to happen when you got a divorce.some ne got to see the children less then the other does.i have no idea whos the best parent but the courts well figuer that one out.just be there when your suppose to be there.get a private phone number and tell your children that any time they need you your only a call away. let them know no one elis has that number and you well always answer no matter what . they may call you every few minutes at first but when they relize you always answer they wont feel the need to call so much. kids just want to know your still there for them.MOST OF ALL DO NOT BAD MOUTH THERE MOTHER OR LET ANY OF YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS TALK BAD ABOUT HER. DONT ALLOW THE CHILDREN TO DO IT EITHER WHEN THERE MAD AT MOM AND WITH YOU. you and your children will be fine,good luck to you.......

Answer 5

My husband has joint custody with his ex as primary guardian and we have his son every other weekend and four weeks out of the summer and one year she has him for a holiday and the next year he has him for the same holiday. GOOD LUCK

Answer 6

I am not a father in this situation but most common is the other parent gets visitation on each and every weekend. And then they share Holidays. Good luck and your kids are lucky to have a dad who cares!!!!!

Answer 7

You're in for hell my friend. Your ex, being the mother, has all the say. Go for as much as you can but tread cautiously for when a woman cries help the law, in regards to children, will jump to her. Remember never get mad and cherish every moment with your children. Good luck!

Answer 8

man if you love your kids take her to court and get joint physical and legal custody of them. i got joint legal and she got physical i hardly get to see my kids now. its only when it is convienent for her. idont even get to see them on the holidays. we started out as friends then a family and then friends then she dont even know me now. becareful for your kids dont let her take them from you they are the most wonderful things in life.

Answer 9

Instead of asking for custody of just kids, ask for ex too.

Answer 10

I AM NOT A FATHER, BUT I BELIEVE THAT A FATHER SHOULD BE ABLE TO SEE HIS CHILDREN ANY TIME HE WANTS. HE HAS BEEN INVOLVED IN THEIR LIVES FROM DAY ONE, HIS RIGHTS SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN AWAY.