hi. i have to write a college application essay.. the topic is WHO AM I?

Question

is there any one who can help me write just the introduction of the essay. i really dont know how to start it off. please reply fast if u can help.
i thought of the first sentence .. mayb it can help
" I am no one special. Like every other teenager, I have responsibilities, goals to reach, and decisions to make. "
can anyone add on to that .. or find something else to say??
please help
thanks

Answer 1

wow thats the opposite of wut u want to say... if ur just like everyone else, why should they pick u?? they wont, u have to stick out and say somethin controversial, a good thing to do is SHOCK THEM, theyll remember u and it might get u into the college

Answer 2

Please don't start with a negative statement! Your letter is to try and get you in to college, not to get you pitied into college (which won't work). If you start with just "I am (name) and I am working towards..." and then state something important that you want to do with your life, or "I am (name) and I believe by working hard and always looking towards my goals, I will succeed in what I set out to do" it will be a more powerful introduction.

A good rule of thumb is to imagine writing for 4 people: one is impatient for you to get to the point, one is interested in all the little details, one is only looking for reasons why he/she should consider you and one is looking for why you are good for them.

Start by stating what the goal of your essay (to be a successful candidate for this college), then state 2 or 3 big reasons WHY you are a good candidate, then you can elaborate into details or demonstrate what you can do for the college (like you want to be involved in activities). The last two are interchangeable but not the first two. Always satisfy the impatient one first! Structure your whole essay around these four ppl and you should have an attentive audience!

Answer 3

Here's a way to get yourself into writing the essay - start with an anecdote, a story that really tells something about you...the kind you would tell as an example of the person you are.


"I was tired, my feet were dragging, but I was determined to sell every box of Girl Scout Cookies..." - and go into a story about how focused you are on your goals.

"Every other kid wanted to be Luke Skywalker for Halloween. I wanted to be Chewbacca. Little did I know this would mean walking around in a piece of fur that smelled like wet sog, wearing a mask that I couldn't even see out of..." - and talk about how you always needed to be different

Or whatever it is that's happened to you.

Answer 4

NO! Colleges are looking for something special. Don't start off with telling them that you're nothing special! they don't even have to read the rest of the essay to know that you're not what they're looking for. Think about what makes you stand out. What makes you different from the rest of the applicants?

Best of luck.

Answer 5

It sounds like you are starting off with a negative. You could ultimately make it work in your favor but it seems very risky to me. I am talking about the, "I am no one special" part.

I would maybe even start out with; Who am I? Like every other teenager, I have...etc.

I would build upon that. They gave you your opening sentence! Good Luck. I hope you get to go to the college of your choice. :)

Answer 6

no, no, no, no, NO!!

if you're like everyone else and not at all special, then why should they let you attend their school over people who are exceptional?

you don't need to tell them that you're god's gift to the world, either. let them know who you WANT to be (we're all a work in progress) and how attending that university will help you get there, as well as how you're being there will get that school to where IT wants to be.

if you don't know what you want to be, then express that. address how attending their school will help you figure that out.

and try not to be vague (i have goals.... yeah, what are they? responsibilities? like what).

get a friend to interview you asking some of these questions. you'll find them better thought out if you have to say them aloud to another person to get them to understand what you're talking about.

good luck!!!!

Answer 7

Delve into the past. Talk about what made you decide to have the goals you have now. Talk about your character, and what helped shape it into what it is now. i fyou have more questions just email me or IM me. I love writing! I always have. I write children's books and poems, and I won an Essay contest once. :)

P.S. I just read that you said College APPLICATION. I missed that part:P hehe. So, yes, listen to what the others have said. Don't present yourself negatively.

Answer 8

"Who am I" is a murderous question to answer, but don't start with a negative.

When NASA was trying to pick the first astronauts, they asked them to give 20 short answers to that question---IIRC, John Glenn said it started getting tough after the first ten or so "obvious" ones (American, military veteran, pilot, married family man, etc.)---but it could be a real eyeopener for how you see yourself, and how you want to present yourself in the essay.

Good luck!

Answer 9

hint hint make an outline and narrowed topic hint hint
ex:essay outline
Intro.Personality, Character in community (friends,ppl) ,Goals. Concl.

Answer 10

Hey, I had this question a really long time ago, when I first started high school. My English teacher wanted us to write a short essay on why we are a valued student at the school, what made us who we are. Um, I can’t pull up a final copy but I have my first paper (LOL, I don’t think that paper was returned to me or don’t know where it is).

I feel that an introduction to these self-discoveries is stronger if you shine out confidence instead of self-degradation. I started off mines with the following, so I hope it might help you with something or ideas if you’re still in need of it. So um, like… compliment yourself instead of degrading yourself. No need to over-compliment, but list out the good you. HEHE.

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“Who am I?”

One uneventful evening, when the day was close to its end, I had stopped in front of a room’s mirror and asked myself that question. My face was distorted by an unwelcome grimace as I continued to seek the answers. My mind was baffled by this taunting question, by the simple meaning it seemed to exude. Yet, as I continued to study the face I bore since birth, self-realization began to surface and that was when I got what I have been seeking. From past experiences and all the bends I were able to pass in life, it had shaped and defined who I am. I am just ‘me’, never a duplicate of another. I am creative, self and strong –willed, and fearless.

(My final draft was less wordy. HAHA.)

[Part One of my body, I used my flaws to develop and explain my creativity. Something like, instead of trying to hide or cover up my flaws, I instead bring it to surface to nourish it. I tend for it like a delicate object, to make it beautiful and sparkle and allow the world to be awed by something they have believed to have no potential.]

[Part Two, I used my habit of easily trusting others. People can manipulate me, but then, I will never weep from their betrayal. Rather, I would lift my head to its highest and return the manipulator a smile, thank him sincerely for toughening my skin and teaching me to sharpen my senses and trust. (I guess it somewhat implies strong-willed) ]

[Last, I would probably go with failures. It’s common, I think. But I described how I value a failure in my heart, because a failure is a treasure. It is the fuel to strive me further to my success. Or you use another metaphor like… each failure is a block to construct your life’s staircase higher. So you are not afraid of failures ]

Of course, I have like back-then stories to support my ideas. =P

And then I end it with something like… See, I only like have my very, very first draft so it’s hard for me to give the exact conclusion… something like…

“I am a valued student to this school because I refuse to be a victim of mental or physical handicap (or defeat, whichever one sounds right). I am creative, strong-minded, and fearless. I am not daunted by what the school or teachers have in store for me. Like a child punching toy, no matter what types of punches you deliver or how many times, I will still bounce back at you with a challenging pose.” (kind of like implying that you'll be successful and complete whatver's required... to me, that is. HEHE).

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It was something like that, I can’t remember. I think it’s a child punching toy, I’m not too sure.

But I hope that kind of helps and give some ideas or inspire something for you. My teacher recommended that you list out all your characteristics and then pick out three that you can develop and delve into. Hehe, I made like a B- for that, which I still believe I deserve at least a B+ because I sure racked my brain out for that! It was so hard! LOL, but still a passing grade, I’m happy. And you used to attend online classes at UNL? How were the tests and courses there? I’m planning to take their high school diploma program. =P I’m just looking more into it before I write out a check or enter the card digits. HEHE. If you wouldn’t mind being helpful, can you email your experiences with UNL IS at [e-mail]? I would really, really appreciate it. =]