to carry out the work, he is popular and there do not seem to be any obvious reasons for him not to be there. He goes out for school at 7.30 (more than ample travel time) and arrives home at the correct time, he never goes to registration but goes to a couple of lessons throughout the day. He is driving me mad at the moment and does not seem to respect me or my wishes, I've tried taking him into class but this was not a long term solution and he didn't go when i stopped taking him.
There has been rumours that he has been smoking cannabis but I have spoken to him about this and gone through the pro's and cons etc but he obviously denies it.
He has a brother in yr 8 at the same school and there are no problems with him (despite his poor role model), I'm beside myself with him and don't know what to do - I am currently facing a fine of £50 because of him (if I get it he won't be getting pocket money for a long time) but even him knowing this has not made him revise his ways. advice pls
2006-09-19 10:22:51 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
1. He could be bored and needs work to be harder.
2. Reiterate the importance of doing well and how this is a stage towards getting to something he finds more interesting.
3. Ask the school to place him on attendance report, Is there a member of staff who can be used to escort him around.
4. Is there any withdrawl of privilege you can withdraw or a series of bonuses that be implemented (carrot and stick) more pocket money/ allowance if he attends all the lessons.
2006-09-19 10:37:25 · answer #1 · answered by bobobob 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like what i went through with my daughter , she convinced me she wasn`t being bullied etc , she never went to registration , she would come home after a lesson or two , i was at my witts end like u ,as her guidance teacher would phone me constantly to ask what was happening and if there was any major family problems that would be affecting my daughter ie , separation or divorce etc , i said things are normal at home , we are all happy nothing that i can think off that would be bothering my girl , anyway to cut a long story short one day when she was late yet again her guidance teacher took her into her office originally to give her a rollicking but my poor lass broke down and revealed all , she was indeed being bullied but too embarrassed to speak up about it , the school were very helpful i have to admit but my daughter just couldn`t deal with it anymore , shes in work experience now as she`s not quite able to leave yet ,shes 16 in December . I also know she has found a friend in alcohol and this is what we are dealing with now , but it did all stem from things going on at school .She was a normal happy child but now shes as deep as the ocean , very quiet and suffers paranoia .
Just please make sure your son isn`t being harrassed at school and if he is get the police involved , i did and got 2 girls charged .
2006-09-20 03:41:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well firstly I would stop his pocket money even iif you are getting the fine as why should he be getting money when he is not attending school
I would also go into school and ask for a meeting with his Head of Year and ask about his work and were he is up to with everything, also ask what the problem in registration is and would it help if he moved classes.
To not face the £50.00 fine I would drop him off at school and sign him in at the front desk with your name at the side to show the school that you are taking him - you could ask for a community police officer to pop round and explain the seriousness of not attending school - this may help - GOOD LUCK
2006-09-19 10:46:40 · answer #3 · answered by Katrina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it could be the group of friends he is hanging around with leading him astray, if you have heard he is smoking canabis that could not help the situation. have you sat him down and asked him why he feels he has to skip school? i cant give you any answers, but i remember when i was at school (i was hardly ever there as school was boring, i didnt seem to have time as i would sooner be working) i was earning my own money so mum didnt give me pocket money, if you stop his money and say if he completes a full week at school he will get it, it may shock him into going. Grounding was another thing my mum used on me, she'd send me to my room and take away my tv, music, mobile etc so i was bored stiff. You say he is 11, is it his first year in secondary school? he could see what the older kids are doing and copying to look cool.
regarding the canabis...tell him you have made a appointment at the doctors for him to have a drugs test (it could shock him) tell him if he tells the truth you can sort it out between yourself and not get the doc involved, then pretend to cancel the appointment if he tells the truth. i hope it all works out for you (i have all this to come with my child so ill be keeping my eye on some of the answers)
2006-09-19 10:34:25 · answer #4 · answered by zeldieuk2002 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I truanted a lot in my last 2 years of school. It was just boring being there.
I dont know what to suggest, my parents drove me to school but I left as soon as they had gone. They took me to social services to see a social worker which didnt help at all, I ended up getting poor results in nearly all my GCSEs.
I`m a parent myself now and I know you have to keep trying with him and the school to avoid any jail sentence.
Stop his pocket money,or take away his mobile and tell him he can have it back after a whole week at school, or even 2 days at school. Negotiate with him.
I found it harder to go to school in the end the more time I had been off, as I felt left out and a bit like the new girl.
2006-09-19 10:38:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that if he keeps ditching school that he will have to pay the fines that the school and courts will give YOU for him not attending school. They CAN and WILL do this. It happened to a friend of mine. The only reason she didn't have to do jail time was because she is disabled. Tell him if you get a notice from the school that you will be fined that he will have to go to a Military school. They will NOT put up with that kind of behavior.
2006-09-19 10:27:17 · answer #6 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to talk to his school. I am in Utah usa. (noticed your money symbol) but here they have trackers, and they also have boot camps. I know that it sounds cruel, but if you are thinking he is smoking, then he needs to grow up. You have another boy to take care of that has not messed up yet. Don't let there be a bad path to follow. Talk to his school and see what they recomend and how they can help. If you still have problems then try talking to the court system. sometimes they can help also.
2006-09-19 10:30:16 · answer #7 · answered by sr22racing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I bet you if as you say he has the ability and he attends some lessons that he is bored, poor thing.... Teacher are responsible for making classes interesting and I bet you son is above average. Speak to his head of year and see
if they can get him something more challenging to keep his active mind occupied
2006-09-19 21:39:16 · answer #8 · answered by bty53404242 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in year 10 and 14 years old and mostly everyone in my year bunks of school. To me, once you get to year 9 everything starts changing. About two thirds of my year smoke as well.
I have never bunked of school or smoked but some of my friends have.
Its just aging.
2006-09-23 10:05:17 · answer #9 · answered by lisapizza1992 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I was you, I would take him to the doctors and have a Wee Sample done for any traces of drugs. If it comes back positive, ground him indefinitely until his attitude changes, threaten him with home tutoring, all things like that. He won't like that one bit and might pull his socks up.
I wish you all the best.
2006-09-20 10:17:06 · answer #10 · answered by bizzybee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋