Recently I left a relationship of 6 years where I grew apart of a group of friends/couples. While deciding I was going to leave him because of his lies, unfaithfulness and how I became his fool. They seemed to all support the fact that I deserved better and he was a jerk. These are the females, on the other hand the guys have been his friends for @ least 10 yrs. See where I'm coming from? The couple we were closest to are the godparents of my child. slowly I have not been on their part and am somewhat ok with it , but whenI needed my best friend she was not there and all Ishe could say was was to keep coming around and stop feeling sorry for myself. My ex has spilled his guts claiming he was really the good guy , now he is the source of our life and I feel betrayed and feel as if I need to just cut all ties ... Sometimes it's as if the gossip was more important than the relationship.. I lost my best friend when I left my ex and I seem to be the only one bothered by it
2006-09-19 09:25:05 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
cut them all of and move on. and if they happen to call you keep in tact to some degree. you dont need friends. you need yourself.
2006-09-19 09:27:52 · answer #1 · answered by sexy c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well of course you would be the only one bothered by it because you were the diplomat and also not the vilain. he was. i again am going through the same thing except that married for 11 years, divorced about 8months ago, got beating up, and my family (cousins and all) all have kids and all supports him. Now i do not know if this is not worst than anything, but the only one that i have with me are my mother and sister and brother all younger in age. my kids do not see their cousins as often as they would like as well as the parents are my children godparents and family member. but guess what, break it off. move on. the whole point of a break up is to make you feel better and be a better person and parent, so why you are so hung up by them. do not worry, you are probably a start among them since half of them would give gold to leave the person they have and be alone. you know what i am talking about. you absolutely do not need them except when you are feeling down and you want a critic to pick you back up, then you call one of them once every 2-3months and they will give you the dosage that you are looking for. i am not trying to be insensitive there, but have a little bit of faith and patience and you will see who will come forward to you and who will not. you have to remember, you also is a human being, you have a house, a patio(that they can sit in) a kid that their kid can play with, and you also have conversation, so my dear they can also come over and talk and if they do not, DO NOT WAIST YOUR TIME... THEY ARE NOT WORTH IT... HOW MUCH DOES YOUR TIME COST? these are the questions and statement that you need to live by. it is unfortunate to have to let go of so much when you divorce or leave someone but it is only then that you can ever know who is there with you, and for you...enjoy your new life, new interest, your kid and yourself and you will see, people do not like to see others happy because jealousy and envy and greed always creeps in...
2006-09-19 09:50:08 · answer #2 · answered by mysterious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not give up the friends that you have established over the years during your relationship. You should however refrain from discussing your breakup or your ex with mutal friends. It is not fair to your friends and puts them in the middle of the two of you. I'm sure you have other friends or family members you can vent to. Of course your ex is going to claim he is the good guy! Do you think he is going to go around saying that I'm a liar and a cheat? Stop complaining to your mutual friends and ask them to introduce you to someone new! Even if you aren't ready for a new relationship, new friends couldn't hurt.
2006-09-19 09:37:30 · answer #3 · answered by kandekizzez 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put yourself in thier shoes,.... you would have done something different right? Why would u want to be freinds with people that dont do things like you? This is an emotional time for you and its only natural to want to have some one there for YOU. But Life goes on, and this is just a passing phase. Sooner than later you will have TRUE freinds. Weather it's today or tomorrow. Keep your head up.
2006-09-19 09:30:50 · answer #4 · answered by Photographer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, if she were truly your best friend she would have been there, so take the hint and cut off the relationships. If they want you to still be involved, do so sparingly, but it is time to move on.
I guess in short, you need to do what's best for you but the best thing would probably be to just go your separate way.
2006-09-19 09:44:28 · answer #5 · answered by Survivors Ready? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So don't be bothered by it. Cut off all ties with them. It's the right way.
2006-09-19 20:01:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this happens to lots of marred people after a divorce,you just move on there are many better friends out there just waiting to meet you!!
2006-09-19 09:34:30 · answer #7 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋