spent at least 200 (it was on ATM) bank statements. He also took out an additional 100 somewhere else. 300 total. AND we are broke. Plus, I think strip clubs are only for single guys. I told him b4 we got married it was a dealbreaker. He also had some icky (blood? chocolate?0 substance on his shirt and it smelled like skank whore. How do I make him pay? And or beg for my forgiveness. Thanks! :)
2006-09-19 05:58:23 · 26 answers · asked by jenlovely01 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Take the lousy jerk's ATM card away.... To make him feel bad talk about all the things that you don't have, and that your friends and/or family have.
2006-09-19 06:01:39 · answer #1 · answered by akristel2003 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't agree with what your husband has done. Spending money foolishly that you do not have in the first place is down right immature and irresponsible.
You must of known that he frequented these establishments before you married him, otherwise, a deal breaker would not have been an issue.
You must figure out what bothered you more, the fact he spent money you did not have or the fact he went against an agreement you made.
You won't be able to make him "Pay" or "beg" for forgiveness, the apology would not be earnest, and the payback will end up in resentment.
Go out with a bunch of girls to a male strip club, have him pay for it, and make him go along. The humiliation alone would put a smile on the face.
2006-09-19 06:21:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree that a strip club is for single guys ONLY!!!! a married man has no business being in there . I told my husband when we where dating that he does not belong in there .. still to this day he knows I will not put up with that kind of stuff , I would divorce him over this .I am so set on this there is no way I would change my mind ! but it is up to you , that is allot of money to spend at that place , no good has come out of a place like that , before I slept with him I would make him get check out by his doctor who know what really happen . those girls will do any thing for the right price .. if you go back on your word (about the deal breaker ) he will do it again , maybe the next time you will not even know it .. if it were my husband he would be down the road .....he more or less is saying he does not care what you say or how you feel , he went there knowing you would be mad ..
2006-09-19 06:39:17 · answer #3 · answered by blueflowerscs 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time to leave - if you told him doing this sort of thing was a 'dealbreaker' and you still stay - that tells him that you are all "bark and no bite".
By staying, you are saying you are willing to tolerate this sort of behavior and who knows what he may do next time -although quite frankly, what you've described already is bad enough.
Think about how you are feeling right now and think about how you felt when you realized he had not only gone to these places, but had spent all of your money as well.
That sickening feeling you are experiencing
in the pit of your stomach right now, is what it feels like to have pieces of your self-esteem
and self-respect ripped away from you.
Mkae him pay by leaving him - and then figure out what to do afterwards. In the meantime, your leaving will send a clear message to him that your feelings are important and not to be trifled with.
2006-09-19 06:18:17 · answer #4 · answered by DG 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They say two wrongs don't make a right but if he already knew how you felt about this situation then I do believe that I would be taking the ATM card and any other cash out of his wallet, dress like one of the strippers, make sure he sees you, and then let him know that after you and the girl's leave the MALE strip club, you will be home late because you'll have to go to "work" at ....add the name of the club he went to here! Even if you just leave and go and sit at your girlfriends or your mothers house, I am sure he will not like it either. Good luck and have fun!!!
2006-09-19 06:09:01 · answer #5 · answered by kimpierce76 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He knew it was a deal breaker and he went anyway. This is the beginning of a long battle for you. The fact that he used what little expendable cash you had shows that he doesn't have the wherewithall to excercise self-control. Time to dump him. Have no fear the strippers aren't interested in long lasting relationship they only want the money. While not all hook on the side some do. Time to start divorce proceedings. I hope that you don't have children this will only compound the issue.
2006-09-19 06:35:55 · answer #6 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just as a sane man should do when he finds out that his hoochie has been prowling lovers lane for esteem you should drop this clown now that you know he liead and cavorted around at the strip club with low class strippers. Liars and cheaters nevr change they simply sink into loathsome denial or try to blame you for their sordid deeds. Find someone you can honestly relax with, can communicate with and trust not suspect and fret about you'll live a happier life and a longer one too. Jump in the shower and wash all memories of this mistake away...
2006-09-19 06:16:14 · answer #7 · answered by ralegas 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you are going to the strip club and get the money back plus some by dancing nude and giving lap dances to other guys. If you find a really hot one, go home with him and do him and have trhe guy take pictures of you so you can show your husband
2006-09-19 06:01:50 · answer #8 · answered by orygunduk1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The more you tell him "no" the more he will rebel. Just let him do his thing and when everything starts to fall apart... his manhood will soon realize he's a **** up. You can't keep telling him...he will have to see for his stuborn self. And as far as the skank whore substance on his collar...hmmm, may be fecal matter. Remember, he was getting lap dances! Just take it or leave him. It's really one or the other. You decide of your own "woman's worth"
2006-09-19 06:04:58 · answer #9 · answered by KISMET 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this was discussed before the marriage then I would say he knows he was not suppose to be there. I am not sure u should leave him just for that, depends on the marriage already, if you can not ever forgive him, then call it quits, don't torture him or yourself, forever. If u think u can forgive him, just work it out , but make him suffer a little either way.
2006-09-19 06:03:13 · answer #10 · answered by erker34 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you already told him it was deal breaker whats the problem? This situation is only gonna get worse. Why do you want him to beg for your forgiveness? Its up to you, but if you don't want him to go to the clubs don't back down now. Stay true to your word and if this was a one time thing then he will not lie to you about it. If he tells you it was no big deal THEN RUN GIRL cause he will do it again and again and again and again! I can promise you that.
2006-09-19 06:11:37 · answer #11 · answered by shugabam! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋