What should I do when everybody around me seems to have a plan laid out for my entire life? And they tell me about it every chance they get. Please don't get all "it's all in your head" or "you can control what goes on inside of you." I want to know something physical I can do, even if nobody but me knows about it, to help me feel more in control. (?)
2006-09-19 05:53:17 · 13 answers · asked by gwenhwyfar2008 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
write about how you feel in a journal or tell the people that you want to plan your own life and you don't want everyone planning it for you. It's your life and in the end your gonna do what you want to anyway, so give them aheads up and tell them that you already know what they want for you but you want to make the final decisions.
2006-09-19 05:59:47 · answer #1 · answered by Charmed 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want to do something physical to feel more in control--right? Why don't you take some self-defence classes. Take boxing or take Karate.
You worry me with "even if nobody but me knows about it" because it sounds as if you would like to do something to yourself.
Lots of teenagers who feel out-of-control feel they gain control by maintaining a specific food intake (or lack of food intake), or by resorting to actions such as cutting, which seems to release some of the interior pain.
I mentioned some physical things you can do--now for your mental health you should seek out a good therapist to help you work out your feelings of inferiority and being out-of-control.
Good luck. You are not alone!
2006-09-19 14:10:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all find something you like to do and work towards doing it. Show them all you can do it! Sounds like you are not being heard by others so explain to them that in the end the decision will be yours. If it is your parents or teachers at school just listen to them as well. Could be that they see the potential in you and want you to make the best effort you can. Find what you want to do and get going!
2006-09-19 13:03:55 · answer #3 · answered by The_answer_person 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your life. Everyone can tell you what they want you do with it, but ultimately it's YOUR choice. They're not the ones who have to live with the decisions you make. My aunt wants me to be a nurse but I want to be a TV/Film director/producer/editor. I, simply, told her what I wanted and she backed off. Everyonce in a while she would ask me about nursing and I would tell her about what I wanted to do.
Maybe, the next time it comes up or the next time U feel is suitable, you should tell everyone who has that plan for your life that it's not what U want to do. If you don't know what you want to do just say something like, "Thank you for your suggestions, but right now I want to see what's right for me."
I hope this helps.
2006-09-19 13:17:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what, just mind your own business and get into a good college - once there you will have more direction & control over what happens - everyone wants their child's life to be better than their own - and i hate to say this but grown up adult people have had more experiences than you have had and it is hard to realize but they went through the same thing you are going through right now - maybe they know it will work out good for you - not just for them
2006-09-19 13:03:15 · answer #5 · answered by AnaMay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your parents for more trush and to be able to help in choices for your life. Let them know they are concerned. That letting you help make choices, and make some on your own, will allow you to have a better understanding of how these choices influence your life. It may take time.
2006-09-19 14:16:27 · answer #6 · answered by erinjl123456 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well. i have found that a polite, but firm, "im still thinking about what I WANT to do. thanks though!" does something to disuade their constant 'feedback.' it also kinda says "shut it!" without saying "shut it!"
if its some one who consistently bugs you (and not just a casual aquaintance) id explain it like this: "i have a list of things that im looking into regarding MY life. they are far to personal to share at this time, but when i am ready to tell the world my plans, i will. when im ready to tell YOU my plans, i will."
once you get them off your back, then you can focus on seeing what you want to do. like what do you like doing? what can you see yourself doing? also- id ask friends who you trust and who know you their opinions. sometimes they can see stuff you cant first-hand. other than that, id just get out and DO stuff and see what entertains you/holds your interest.
2006-09-19 13:02:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anya D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Participate in sports. Lift weights. Take a yoga class. Learn a martial art (I recommend Aikido). Your mind and body will work better together and you will be in control.
2006-09-19 12:56:08 · answer #8 · answered by Bors 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am graduating high school and I have no idea what I want to do. No plan about where I'm going just what I want.
2006-09-19 13:22:22 · answer #9 · answered by reba s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just smack them, and say "This is my life! And I will do with it what I got damn well please" *smack* *smack* Is that physical enough for you? But whatever you do, don't rebel and make **** out of your life. That would be the worst thing, just do what you want.
2006-09-19 12:56:52 · answer #10 · answered by vrangel0668 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋